Only Human
by TachyonOne
Summary: Belldandy and the others have to cope when a freak accident strips her of her powers and makes her human.
1. Circuit Breaker

Only Human  
  
An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic  
  
By Roehl Sybing  
  
Chapter One: Circuit Breaker  
  
Keiichi pressed hard against the wall of the temple as the winds fought his every step. He kept everything just under his eyes covered with his rain- soaked jacket. He was making his way to the circuit breaker, situated in an odd corner of the temple grounds, a small room attached to the larger building but only accessible from the outside. With no illumination to guide him, Keiichi depended on the shape of the temple wall to take him where he needed to go. Without a doubt, this storm was the worst anyone had seen in a long time. Keiichi thought of nothing else to do but press on and make for the circuit breaker and restore power to the residence.  
  
---  
  
Inside, the hallway was lit with candles and littered with buckets and pans, protecting the floor from a leak-filled ceiling that was doing all it could not to buckle under the forces of the storm. Skuld was doing all she could to keep the floor dry, running up and down the hall, laying more buckets here and there. Sometimes one leak would stop and another would begin again, so she, thinking it just one more problem to solve, made some quick rearranging. At last, with so many obstacles about the floor, Skuld eventually tripped on a pail, causing her and a great deal of water to spill onto the hard surface.  
  
"Waaah!" Skuld cried, "It's no use, there's just too many leaks!"  
  
Urd floated out of her room, looking over her younger sister, "What're you fretting about now?"  
  
"Hey, shouldn't you be helping out?"  
  
"It seems like so much work for nothing," Urd yawned, examining the large puddle of water on the floor, despite Skuld's best efforts, "I wouldn't have worried about it!"  
  
"Well, isn't that a lame attitude, Urd!" she pouted.  
  
"I didn't get the floor all wet, kid."  
  
"It's not my fault! It's this stupid old house! First the power outage, and now the roof!" she said, as Belldandy walked in with a mop in her hands.  
  
"Don't say that, dear," Belldandy said, taking care of the floor, "We should be thankful for all that this house has done for us. It's a good friend to all of us."  
  
"There you go with your crazy ideas again, sis," Urd retorted.  
  
"It's true!" Belldandy insisted, "It's given us a place to sleep, a place to eat...it's kept us warm at night, cool during the day. This house has always been here for us when we need it, surely we can tend to it when it needs us."  
  
Urd floated away, saying "That's right, Skuld. She's saying lay off the buckets, kid."  
  
"But the roof!" Skuld exclaimed.  
  
"It will survive this storm, I'm sure. Everything falters now and then," Belldandy said, "It is simply a test of true strength. Right now, we must-- "  
  
The goddess stopped in mid-sentence as the lights around the house lit up again. "Oh, thank Keiichi!" she said, relieved, "He must have found the circuit breaker."  
  
"Alright!" Urd said, "Now I can watch my program again!"  
  
Quickly, the three goddesses returned to what they were doing. Urd, of course, went back to her room, not lifting a finger to help Skuld clean the floor or protect against the leaky ceiling. And Belldandy returned to her own tasks, making sure dinner wouldn't be too late. The brief outage stopped cold her efforts to prepare a meal for four, so she picked up right where she left off, not minding the fierce storm outside. The thunder and the lightning did not bother her one bit, as she worked to put the finishing touches on dinner. Of course, the only thing that caught Belldandy's attention was the sliding open of the door before Keiichi walked in.  
  
Naturally, she rushed to his aid, "Were you alright out there, Keiichi?"  
  
"Yeah!" he said, mustering up what little masculine independence he had within him, "Not a problem at all."  
  
"Oh, you're all soaked! Let me take care of your coat. And your shoes, they're--"  
  
"It's OK!" Keiichi said, smiling, "Just damp, is all. How's dinner coming along?"  
  
"It's almost ready," she said, almost not paying any thought to the food, "Are you sure you don't need any help with your clothes?"  
  
Now that was not such a bad idea, Keiichi thought to himself. He would've easily dropped all of his defenses, if it weren't for Skuld in plain sight, crawling around to deal with the puddles on the floor but able to listen to their conversation.  
  
"Heh heh," he laughed, "Don't worry about it, Bell! I'll just change clothes and get ready for dinner."  
  
"Oh, alright."  
  
Of course, Keiichi thought about it as he walked to his room. He got an odd look from Skuld along the way, but he thought about it nonetheless.  
  
---  
  
Dinner was perfect, same as always. The four seated around the table almost forgot about the storm outside, but the timely lightning strike always reminded them of its presence. Still, the residence, with all of its obvious flaws at the moment, kept them safe and warm, as Belldandy suggested. Thus, they did their best to ignore the elements outside.  
  
"You are such a marvel, sister!" Skuld said, "No one can cook like you!"  
  
"Why, thank you, Skuld," Belldandy replied.  
  
"I wish I was as perfect as you, Belldandy," she said, continuing to heap praise.  
  
"Well, if you work hard, you can be whatever you want to be," Belldandy said, "But even I am not perfect, dear."  
  
"I think my younger sister's being a bit modest," Urd said jokingly.  
  
"Yeah," Keiichi added.  
  
"Oh, stop!" she exclaimed, smiling and blushing at the same time, "I've always done my best, that's all. But even I have the potential to fail, to be imperfect."  
  
"Well, perfect or not, you're still the best," Keiichi said, rising to help with the dishes, "Thank you for dinner, as always, Bell."  
  
The other two gave their gratitude as Urd shuttled Skuld out of the room, leaving the couple to mind the cleaning. On a good day, Keiichi would have noticed the opportunity that quiet solitude with Belldandy presented. But on a terrible night such as this, with water still in his ear and a slight chill in the air, he remained completely innocent as he helped Belldandy with the dishes.  
  
"Keiichi?" she asked, piling up the dishes.  
  
"Yes, dear?"  
  
"Do I...fail to meet your expectations?"  
  
Keiichi turned his head, startled by the question but not knowing its meaning.  
  
"I mean, when you said I was perfect and I said that I was not. Does that...disappoint you?"  
  
"Not at all!" he retorted, putting down everything without a second thought, "After all this time, have you ever disappointed me?"  
  
She looked at him, unsure whether or not to shake her head, though she knew the obvious answer.  
  
"Belldandy...I don't think I will ever find the words to tell you how happy I've been since I met you, but you're just gonna have to trust that I believe that I'm the luckiest guy in the world. So what if you're not perfect?" Keiichi asked, "You are mine, and I am yours, and that's all that matters."  
  
"Keiichi," Belldandy said with a faint but growing smile, "Thank you!"  
  
"No, Bell," he said, "Thank you." Somewhere in his brief monologue he came upon the fact that he was alone with Belldandy. He'd like not to take advantage of his making her happy at that moment, but such openings were open to him, if ever. Keiichi drew closer to her, hoping that he just might steal a kiss from a goddess.  
  
Suddenly, a thud gently shook the house and broke their close contact, and before Keiichi could kick himself for blowing the chance, the sound of Skuld crying from a distance drew them out of the room and into the hallway.  
  
---  
  
"Stupid puddle!" Skuld cried, obviously having slipped on a pool of water lying on the floor underneath a dripping ceiling.  
  
"Hold on, I'm coming," the two heard Urd say from her room. Belldandy and Keiichi were not far behind.  
  
"Hey, Skuld, are you OK?" Keiichi said, looking to help.  
  
"Do I look OK?" Skuld replied through the pain.  
  
Belldandy was right behind Keiichi, "Skuld, dear, do you--"  
  
Suddenly, the lights in the house flickered as the goddess pressed her hand against the wall. Keiichi turned around; Belldandy was being electrocuted.  
  
"Belldandy!" he shouted.  
  
The goddess froze, crying out in pain. A great deal of electricity coursed through the wall and into Belldandy, as the others stood helpless, instinctively pulling back at one instant in fear that the charge may very well be lethal. Yet, Keiichi couldn't just watch his Belldandy suffer like she was at that moment.  
  
"No, Keiichi!" Urd said, trying with futility to stop him. But he did what he could, pushing her away from the wall with enough force to keep her a good distance from the wall.  
  
"Oh no!" Skuld shrieked, "What happened to Belldandy!?"  
  
"I don't know!" the third goddess said, panicking. She examined the surface that Belldandy pressed against as she was electrocuted. It was damp with the rain that leaked from the ceiling. Faulty wiring inside the wall would've easily made it a very nasty trap.  
  
"Belldandy?" Keiichi said softly as he lay beside her, "Belldandy?"  
  
Skuld and Urd came to their aid, hoping that the incident was far from serious. "What's wrong? What's wrong!?"  
  
For the longest time, Belldandy lay there on the floor, motionless. They knew not whether to move her or keep her there. Frankly, the three were simply stunned. The sounds of their own breathing easily drowned out the storm outside.  
  
"Can't you do anything!?" Keiichi pleaded to Urd.  
  
"No, she has to come out of it by herself."  
  
"Well, she's not breathing, Urd! Shouldn't you--"  
  
"Our biology is different from yours, Keiichi! Human methods won't work, she has to--"  
  
Keiichi looked down, hearing Belldandy, resting in his arms, gasp a breath of air. Her eyelids moved about, much to his relief and to the relief of her sisters, and she gently opened her eyes.  
  
"Keiichi?" she said very softly.  
  
"It's alright," he replied, "You had a very bad shock. Just--"  
  
"No, I'm OK," she said, slowly rising to her feet. Her knees quickly buckled, but she regained her footing with little effort.  
  
"Sister, maybe you should take it easy!" Skuld said.  
  
"Yeah, Bell," Keiichi added, "You should--ow!"  
  
He gripped his shoulder. It was in pain, after hitting the deck with such great force.  
  
"Let me look at that, Keiichi," Belldandy said, not minding her younger sister's advice. She lifted up his sleeve, and his shoulder had suddenly become swollen with red. "Oh, you're hurt! I can take care of the pain," she said, covering the injury with her hand. The goddess closed her eyes, praying for healing to come to him.  
  
Yet, nothing happened. The thoughts of healing would have channeled from her mind and to her hand and into Keiichi's sore shoulder. But it hardly happened as expected. In fact, it didn't happen at all. Of course, Keiichi, not knowing what Belldandy was doing, didn't expect anything to occur, but gathered that something was wrong if she stood beside him in quiet emotional shock.  
  
"Belldandy?" Urd said.  
  
"It's not working," Belldandy said to her older sister.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I can't…my power!"  
  
"What do you mean?" Keiichi asked.  
  
"I mean--ow!" Belldandy looked down. She brushed her skirt aside to reveal her knees, scraped and splintered by the rough wooden floor, red with either faint traces of blood or the burning of the skin. "Oh no!"  
  
Keiichi looked on, oblivious, saying, "Doesn't look too serious. I'll go get something to treat it." He took a step towards the washroom for the first aid kit, when he realized that, in all his time with Belldandy, after all the cutthroat races and after all the scrapes over the years, he had never needed to treat her until now. No sooner had he turned around did Belldandy's sisters rush to her side. Their beloved goddess was standing frozen in the midst of apparent shock. It was only until now did the fierce rain and thunder outside pierce the silence inside the residence.  
  
---  
  
A sound filled Keiichi's ears, though it wasn't the chirping of birds long after the storm died down and the sun rose. He lifted his head from his arms after having slept uncomfortably sitting at the table. He had lost track of time, and the moments leading up to his dozing off were all a blur. Something was wrong with Belldandy…Urd was in a frenzy…Skuld resorted to a full-blown panic throughout the house. Slowly Keiichi pieced together what he still couldn't understand. But the sound the two elder sisters politely arguing with each other entered his hearing again, so he instinctively made for Belldandy's bedroom.  
  
"I am fine, Urd, really!"  
  
"That is not what I think, and I need you to stay in bed!"  
  
"I know you want to take care of me, but--"  
  
"You're damn right! At least until this…whatever you have…is fixed!"  
  
Keiichi listened from outside the bedroom, picking the right moment to enter. Was she sick? Had that shock done something to her? And were those scrapes on her leg a sign of something terrible? The questions raced through Keiichi's mind, and it was clear that there really was no appropriate time to rush to Belldandy's side except now.  
  
"Belldandy?" Keiichi cried as he slid the door open.  
  
"Oh, Keiichi!" Belldandy exclaimed.  
  
"Are you alright?"  
  
Urd looked at her younger sister, as if to persuade her to say what needed to be said, but Belldandy, putting up a weak smile, insisted, "Everything is going to be fine."  
  
"She lost her powers, Keiichi," Urd said in one quick breath, "That electrical shock made her human."  
  
Keiichi was taken aback, "W-what?"  
  
---  
  
"In principle, when goddesses come down to Earth," Urd said, trying to explain to all the rest, particularly to Keiichi, "Our souls are normally projected into these bodies, much like a flashlight shining onto a wall. We're never truly here, but our actions affect everything around us."  
  
Keiichi shook his head, "So what happened when Belldandy was electrocuted?"  
  
"That's the thing. The projection is a two-way connection between Earth and the Yggdrasil system. The electricity was sent through Belldandy and up to Heaven, and the connection was severed."  
  
"So," he said, "Why is she still here?"  
  
Urd continued, "I don't know. This…has never happened before. From what I can tell, the severance is somewhere between Yggdrasil and Belldandy, so when the projection was cut, she had nowhere to go except into her form on Earth."  
  
"That is why I have no powers," Belldandy spoke up. They looked at her briefly; her expression of contentment hid any resentment if it existed at all.  
  
"Can it be fixed?"  
  
"The system techs are confident," Urd said, "But it's going to take some time, they believe."  
  
"Belldandy," Keiichi said emotionally, "I am so sorry!"  
  
"Please, don't be sad!" Belldandy replied, "The condition is temporary until it is fixed, so there is no need to be worried."  
  
"Well," he insisted, "How long?"  
  
Belldandy had no answer. She looked at Urd, who instinctively looked away. "It could be tomorrow," the elder sister said, "But it could be weeks from now, maybe more!"  
  
---  
  
"Maybe more…" rung in the ears of Keiichi…and Belldandy as well. Still, Belldandy persisted in not making too much of a problem out of her plight. It took a day or two before the others hid their concern, and went on with life as best as could be carried out. Urd kept a line to the system technicians of Yggdrasil open every day; some days there were progress, others days there were not. But they took some small comfort that Belldandy had not worsened. She was her cheery, loving self, same as always, with no sign of changing. Daily life was inconvenienced here and there, not because Belldandy had no powers, but because she had become human. Usually, she could almost always read Keiichi like a book, but her sixth sense was gone. Tasks were just a bit more menial, and the strain of daily chores was mild, but physical pain was new to Belldandy. In every aspect, Belldandy was a normal, human woman, who now experienced the world from a smaller, insignificant perspective. The symbol of inner strength that she was, though, she took it all in stride in front of her sisters and her beloved Keiichi and his friends.  
  
---  
  
One day, Belldandy almost forgot about her situation. She had never thought of it as a real problem - she still lived with Keiichi, her two sisters were still there for her, and she had not made any great changes to her routine - but the others insisted that she try to be more careful. Until that day, of course. Finally, she had not heard any of them show any unnecessary concern for her well-being.  
  
Curious. Was she bothered by their constant outpouring?  
  
"Ouch!"  
  
Belldandy looked down at what she was doing. She had been chopping up vegetables on the kitchen counter, until the knife pierced the flesh on her index finger. Quickly, it showed spots of red. She pressed her finger to put pressure on the wound, and brought it against her lips to wipe away the blood. It stung with pain, being exposed to the open air.  
  
"Damn!"  
  
The word barely escaped Belldandy's mouth before she noticed what she had said. With her good hand she covered her lips, and looked around. There was no one to hear it, as everyone was tending to their own tasks. The goddess brushed aside any thoughts of distress, and made light of the pain she was experiencing. Laughing quietly to herself, she wrapped some cloth around the cut and returned to what she was doing, not giving one more thought to her error.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED. 


	2. New Attitude

Only Human  
  
An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic  
  
By Roehl Sybing  
  
Chapter Two: New Attitude  
  
It wasn't that Belldandy had never experienced physical pain before, but this was different. After a long, deep sleep, she felt an overbearing pressure inside of her head. Human beings experienced this upon having been asleep for too long, but for the goddess this was a new sensation that displeased her.  
  
When she opened her eyes and realized the forces pulling her between seeking a few more moments of sleep and finally waking up for the day ahead, Belldandy knew not what was more terrifying to her: suffering real physical pain, or experiencing these new emotions that she had long been able to eliminate from her psyche.  
  
Over what am I distraught? Belldandy thought to herself. It was no use to be this way in front of the others. The Yggdrasil technicians over the phone had assured her that her brief disconnect with heaven was temporary. She could withstand these sensations for a little while. She could withstand being human, being without her powers, in a world of humans. Yes! With a bit of confidence, she could overcome this sudden misfortune.  
  
An emotion familiar to her - happy resolve - returned. Belldandy was determined to take on the day with her revived belief in herself. She had no choice, but she nonetheless believed herself to be ready for any challenge that faced her.  
  
The clock from outside her bedroom chimed at the top of the hour. Belldandy dressed up, silently counting the chimes, ten times. She had overslept!  
  
---  
  
"Good morning, big sister!" Skuld exclaimed as the door to the room slid open.  
  
Slightly blushing, Belldandy apologized to those already seated at the table, "I'm sorry. I must have been asleep for too long."  
  
"Don't worry, Skuld was kind enough to make tea for us this morning," Keiichi said, half-standing up to help Belldandy before he was certain she could help herself at the table.  
  
"Hey! Are you saying that I'm not kind on other mornings!?" Skuld retorted.  
  
"N-no, I-I just meant--"  
  
Urd clutched Keiichi and pulled him closer, saying, "You're not winning this argument, kiddo."  
  
"I suppose," he said, "Have some tea, Bell."  
  
"Thank you," Belldandy said softly, having been lent a cup with some of Skuld's tea. She drew it near to her lips, feeling the heat drift from the surface of the liquid. Inside of the goddess, though, was this sudden fear. She lacked the vocabulary to articulate the sensation, only that it had something to do with her fingers grasping the cup and growing uncomfortable with the heat of the tea being transferred to her skin, and that she supposed that she would not like her mouth to experience the same displeasure.  
  
Regardless, though, Belldandy took a sip of tea, and flinched ever so slightly. The tea was not overbearingly hot, but had a bitter taste to it, and her reaction to to the sensation grabbed the attention of the others, still on edge given her current state.  
  
"Belldandy?" Urd said instinctively.  
  
"Come to think of it, this tea IS rather bitter--" Keiichi said, not being able to stop himself before realizing he had forget who had made the tea.  
  
Skuld rose to her feet, "How dare you criticize my cooking! Just because I've never made any food before!" Naturally, she brought her hand back and pushed it forward towards Keiichi. Down went the hapless Keiichi, who now had "IDIOT" stamped on his forehead. Speechless, he let Urd do the talking as he sat back up.  
  
"You asked for it, I guess," she said jokingly.  
  
At that moment, Belldandy looked at Keiichi. At first, she wore a blank stare, which had slowly turned into a faint smile, then into an amused grin. Before the other three knew it, she had burst out laughing, pressing one hand against her chest and the other against her mouth, as if to contain her amusement.  
  
Skuld caught the moment of humor, and followed along with some childlike chuckling of her own. Urd did the same, simply to add insult to Keiichi's superficial injury. He couldn't say a single word for a long time, having unwittingly been stamped with one more of Skuld's spells. After a while, the laughter still remained but had calmed down a bit. "Could somebody please take this off?" Keiichi said lightly, forcing a weak smile.  
  
"I'm sorry," Belldandy said between catching her breath from all the amusement, "I just couldn't help myself!"  
  
"Well, I'm glad I could entertain."  
  
"No, I'm really sorry!" she insisted, "Skuld, please apologize to Keiichi, now!"  
  
Skuld silently protested, but before she returned to another bout of laughter, she did as her sister told, "Keiichi...I'm...I'm...sorry, OK?"  
  
---  
  
"Well, I'm really not an expert," Chihiro said, sticking a flashlight inside the wall, "But it looks like there's some bare wire touching the metal plating in this wall. You gotta get someone to repair the wiring in here, especially if it's going to leak into this thing."  
  
"Thanks, Chihiro," Keiichi replied as he continued to stack together the boxes of spare parts she had dropped off.  
  
"Was in the neighborhood," she said, smiling, "What're you doing to your forehead?"  
  
"Me?" he said, habitually rubbing his hand across his forehead, "Uh, I spilled something on it this morning, so--"  
  
"Uh-huh," she said, unconvinced but unconcerned, "So, how's Belldandy doing?"  
  
Keiichi turned his head for a moment, hearing laughter outside on the residence grounds. Belldandy was out there along with her sisters. His face expressed contentment after being reassured of normalcy, and he said, "She got hurt pretty bad, but it's nothing that she can't handle."  
  
"I'll bet! She's a fighter, I'm sure of it," Chihiro said, walking towards the stack of machine parts that Keiichi had set up, "So I guess you two will be ready for the race next weekend?"  
  
"Absolutely!" Keiichi exclaimed, "Can't miss out, either, with such a huge chance to win."  
  
"Well, I'm counting on you two. The club could really use the boost in membership, so--"  
  
"Excuse me!" said Urd as the front door slid open. Keiichi and Chihiro looked on as Urd crouched down on Skuld's bicycle. Being older and taller than the intended rider, the goddess struggled to maneuver the device, but managed all the same as her counterpart, not ten paces behind her.  
  
"Wait for me!" Belldandy said, laughing playfully and pedaling on her own bicycle at a leisurely pace. Much to Keiichi's surprise, one chased after the other, from the front door, around the living room and back out again, with Skuld's voice from outside persuading in vain to get her bicycle back from Urd. And as the tire treads intersected the floor of the house, Keiichi could only look on in curious bewilderment.  
  
"Well," Chihiro said, once the bicyclists returned to the outside again, "Belldandy sure seems none the worse."  
  
"I guess," Keiichi replied, the more confounded of the two.  
  
"Keiichi!" Belldandy said, appearing to them again without her bicycle. She walked to him, and locked her arm around Keiichi's, which certainly caught him by surprise. "Hello, Chihiro," she said in a strangely playful tone.  
  
"You're awfully cheerful today," Keiichi's boss said, amused.  
  
"Why wouldn't I be?" she said, now looking at Keiichi, "It's such a nice day, won't you come on outside?"  
  
He was absolutely flushed, spots of red filling his cheeks. Never had Belldandy been such a flirt with him, and he knew not what to make of her new attitude.  
  
"I, uh, better get going. I'll see you tomorrow, Morisato," Chihiro said, reading Belldandy's face like a book, and showing herself out.  
  
Keiichi sought the aid of Chihiro, but was anchored by a bubbling goddess. He could only look at her and guess at her motives. He had finally stopped blushing, saying, "Yeah, it is a nice day, let's--"  
  
"Keiichi?"  
  
"Yes, Bell?"  
  
"Let's go out tonight."  
  
Keiichi recoiled, "What do you mean?"  
  
"Let's - what do humans call it? Let's go on a date tonight."  
  
With those words, he almost fell backwards if it weren't for Belldandy holding his arm so tightly. He stuttered, "I-I-I never th-thought I'd hear you s-s-say such a thing."  
  
"Why?" Belldandy reacted, now letting go and gently pushing away from him, "Does that not make you happy?"  
  
Keiichi gasped, "Yes! Oh, yes, it does! But--"  
  
"Then let's go somewhere. Anywhere," she said, spinning around once for Keiichi. Suddenly, she stopped. Her cheery composure turned to one of slight caution, "I don't know what's happening to me, Keiichi."  
  
The words echoed in his ears, and it was then, for the very first time, that Keiichi finally connected Belldandy's mishap to her sudden change in attitude. Of course, he wanted what Belldandy was asking of him, but he was instinctively more concerned about what brought about this onset of flirting. "Perhaps it's better that you should rest, Belldandy. I mean, I, uh--"  
  
"I just thought," she said softly, almost on the precipice of emotional collapse, "I don't know what these feelings are. Some of them are bad, but some of them are good, I think...I just thought that I could make the best of this with you, Keiichi. I guess I was--"  
  
Keiichi grabbed Belldandy by the arms, and picked up her head. "Perhaps a movie tonight would be a good idea, don't you think?"  
  
She looked at him, and smiled, filled with joy. She kissed him gently on the cheek, and said before rushing off, "I'll go pick a dress for tonight!"  
  
Keiichi grinned as he watched Belldandy run off, but his smile eventually faded, and while standing in the very same spot where he had started, he couldn't help but think that the advantages of the situation could also be coupled with some terrible drawbacks. He didn't know what they were, of course. In his heart, he knew Belldandy loved him as much as he loved her. Unconditionally. But, as Keiichi had seen in many dramas, that never got in the way of some violently emotional disputes.  
  
---  
  
Keiichi slid open the door to Urd's domain, releasing smoke from the various chemicals that made up her makeshift lab. The reactive cough caught Urd's attention.  
  
"So," she said, "I was thinking it might've been more romantic if you were the one doing the asking out, but I suppose it'll do."  
  
"Gee," Keiichi said, gritting his teeth, now finding his ego suddenly bruised, "Thanks, Urd."  
  
"I suppose you need some magic potion from me, one that'll lead to a storybook interlude at the end of the night. What do you say?"  
  
"I can take care of myself," he said, confident of his seldom-if-ever-used dating skills.  
  
"Yeah, whatever," she scoffed, "What can I do you for, then?"  
  
"Well, don't you think that Belldandy's been acting a little, uh, strange? I mean, since the accident?"  
  
Urd finally turned around, "Now that you mention it, I guess I haven't--"  
  
"You mean--?"  
  
She tapped him on the head, "Of course I've noticed! All of us have noticed!"  
  
"Well, shouldn't we do something about it?"  
  
"Like what?" she asked, folding her arms, compelling Keiichi to shrug his shoulders in ignorance. Urd continued, "As near as I can tell, they've got it all under control upstairs. They think they can try something as early as next week, so I really wouldn't worry about it."  
  
"You don't think it's serious?"  
  
"Well, what would you like me to do? Keep the door to Belldandy's bedroom closed?" Urd asked rhetorically. At last, she put everything down and sat down next to Keiichi. "I know what's it like to be in love. I know what you're thinking. 'Belldandy's a delicate creature, I must protect her.'" she mocked.  
  
"I didn't say that," he retorted.  
  
"Well, you must be thinking something like that. So, you put her on a pedastal, keeping her away from everything else. Let me give you some advice, Keiichi. If you do try to shield her, she will absolutely not like it. I really wouldn't do it, kid."  
  
"You think I should let her do as she pleases, even if--?"  
  
Urd grinned, "Let me put it this way. Some birds are just so beautiful, they simply need to fly. And if I were you, I wouldn't keep my bird caged up."  
  
Keiichi thought about it. Perhaps Urd was right. Perhaps it wouldn't be too terrible to give Belldandy what she wants.  
  
"And anyways, I wouldn't worry about Belldandy. Like I said, they've got it covered upstairs."  
  
He took Urd's advice to heart, no longer focusing on the effects of Belldandy's situation but on his prospects on the date. "I don't think I'll be needing any potions, Urd," he smirked.  
  
"Oh, ho ho!" Urd said, "I'll keep Skuld busy tonight, how about that?"  
  
---  
  
"But, sister!" Skuld protested, "It's dangerous out there at night!"  
  
"It will be fine," Belldandy replied, "There's nothing out there that should trouble us."  
  
"I meant with him!" she said, pointing at Keiichi.  
  
"Now, Skuld," she replied, looking at Urd.  
  
Urd sprang to her feet, "Well, uh, it's time to tuck you into bed now, Skuld!"  
  
"What're you talking about?" Skuld cried, picked off the ground and carried away from the entry hall.  
  
Keiichi gripped the back of his neck, laughing nervously and saying, "Perhaps this may not be a good idea--"  
  
Belldandy took him by the arm again, and said, "You're right, let's forget dinner. How about we skip straight to the movie?"  
  
She continued to surprise him in many more ways than one. He felt he could do no better if he didn't chicken out of their date.  
  
---  
  
Before they knew it, Keiichi and Belldandy found themselves in a crowded movie theater. Of course, not before the countless number of heads turned towards the stunning beauty making her way across town and into the movie house.  
  
The scenes played across the screen, light and shadow contributed to the drama, and the moviegoers around them reacted accordingly. Not like Keiichi was paying any attention to the movie at all.  
  
What was once too confident for his own good earlier on had turned into a nervous wreck midway through the film. Perhaps Belldandy was experiencing fear as well, Keiichi reasoned. But that was no way to make the most of an ideal situation! How many times had they gone to a movie theater together? By themselves? He could count it on one hand. And yet, after a number of scenes into the movie, Keiichi had yet to make a single move.  
  
Belldandy laughed at the joke made on the movie screen, half oblivious to Keiichi at that moment. Maybe if he just...  
  
"Oh!" she said gently, with Keiichi's arm wrapped around her. Belldandy blushed, and her red cheeks shone in the light reflected off the movie screen. She responded in kind, holding his hand ever so gently.  
  
Within, Keiichi was ecstatic. As different as Belldandy was on this night, her warmth was felt by him, same as always. He looked at her, and she looked back, and they smiled at each other before she placed her head on his shoulder, pleasantly turning around a rather uneventful date.  
  
---  
  
The motorcycle and its sidecar were parked just outside of a nearby playground, where Belldandy wanted to grasp the sensation of riding on a child's swing.  
  
"Should this be going so high?" Belldandy said with a hint of fear in her voice, now being susceptible to gravity just like everyone else.  
  
"Sure," Keiichi responded between the motions of pushing her to give the swing momentum, "Should I stop?"  
  
"No! No!" she retorted, "Actually, this feels exciting!"  
  
They both laughed and continued the activity for a while longer, until Belldandy simply needed to catch her breath. When she finally came down, Keiichi sat on the swing right next to her. He was still laughing as Belldandy gathered herself, "What's so funny?"  
  
"I don't know," he said, "I was just thinking, you know, here I have a goddess by my side every day, and shows me things I couldn't imagine in my wildest dreams. Yet, she's still amused by simple things, like riding on a swing!"  
  
"Oh," Belldandy replied softly, "I'm sorry..."  
  
"No, don't be!" Keiichi said, "It was a compliment, I suppose. I guess, no matter what happens to you, It's just that you never cease to amaze me."  
  
Those words made Belldandy's heart jump. She smiled at Keiichi, and pressed against her heart, beating faster and faster. She felt wonderful inside. Just being with Keiichi always made her happy, but ironically, being reduced to a mere human being made her all the more perceptive of her emotions. Belldandy was completely uncertain of what she should do. She squirmed in the seat of her swing, until, suddenly...  
  
"Ah!" she cried, falling out of the seat and onto the rocks of the ground beneath her.  
  
"Belldandy!" Keiichi said, jumping off the swing and rushing to her aid. The rocks pinched her hands on which she balanced her weight. "Are you alright?" he asked.  
  
"I-I don't think so," Belldandy said. She looked at her hands; the stones had made small but painful indentations in her hands and wrists. She clenched her hands, and they stung even more. "Pain is a strange sensation," she said, "Should it hurt this much?"  
  
Keiichi knelt down and examined her hands, "Well, this is nothing. You probably won't feel a thing by tomorrow morning."  
  
The goddess was distressed, "How do humans handle this physical pain? It must be unbearable at times!"  
  
He looked at her curiously, sitting down completely onto the ground. He said, "I suppose we've been through worse. I mean, when you think about having hurt feelings, a few bumps or bruises will never compare."  
  
She shook her head, "I don't think I understand."  
  
"Well," Keiichi said, "If I ever get into a motorcycle accident, I know there's only one thing that would hurt more. You know what I mean, right?"  
  
Belldandy nodded, finally understand. She leaned forward, pressing her hand against his chest. Keiichi looked down, and they both felt intense anticipation of what seemed imminent. He would never, ever - EVER - make a move more provocative than pulling Belldandy closer to him. What was required was much more intimate, and yet Keiichi refrained from acting on his courage.  
  
To his pleasant surprise, the emotional barriers that helped shape the goddess Belldandy were, for the moment, no longer. All night long, Belldandy had felt a physical attraction that was never prominent until the accident. She could not describe what she was feeling, only that it felt wonderful and fleeting and that she never wanted the feeling to go away. It was Belldandy's instincts that drew the two closer to each other. What was it like to really kiss the one you love? she thought to herself. I would very much like to find out tonight. Just one kiss...  
  
"No."  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"I said, no. I'm sorry, Keiichi," Belldandy said.  
  
"What's wrong?" Keiichi asked.  
  
She gripped her body. Her chest was tight and her stomach was turning knots throughout an excess of emotions that were foreign to her. "I don't know what it is," she said, "I don't know if I'm afraid or excited or if it's something else. I don't think I can handle what's happening to me when I'm like this."  
  
Keiichi pulled away, though with a sense of understanding. "Maybe we should call it a night," he said softly.  
  
Belldandy slowly nodded, and after one pulled the other off the ground, they made for the motorcycle to head on home. The trip home was absolutely quiet, to say the least, for both were too fearful of hurting each other's feelings. Keiichi dared not say a word because Belldandy was too confused as it was, and Belldandy would not break the silence, thinking she had already disappointed Keiichi after coming so far, just to fall so short. Only the sound of the motorcycle's engine and the friction of its tires hitting the road pierced the quiet nighttime air on the way home.  
  
---  
  
Belldandy opened the door to her bedroom as Keiichi stood behind her. She entered through the doorway, leaving the lights off.  
  
"I..." she tried to say.  
  
"It's alright," Keiichi said, refusing to show one hint of disdain.  
  
"I just want to..." she mumbled, shaking her head.  
  
"Get some sleep," he replied, "There's always tomorrow."  
  
Belldandy nodded, and, after Keiichi walked off to his own room, slid the door closed. On the floor lay her bed, not having been made that morning. She collapsed down onto it and curled up into a ball. The goddess silently cried herself to sleep, but not before asking repeatedly, over and over, "What is happening to me?"  
  
TO BE CONTINUED... 


	3. These Dreams

Only Human  
  
An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic  
  
By Roehl Sybing (zero@infinitedeferral.com)  
  
Chapter Three: These Dreams  
  
"No! Please, don't! No!"  
  
"Belldandy?" Keiichi shouted as he slid the door open. On her bed, the goddess struggled about, pleading aloud in her sleep. Before the night had become too old, her speech drifted in and trailed off and back again, but Belldandy's calling his name remained constant, and that was what woke Keiichi and brought him to her side. It was not even a moment more of watching her cry for help that he could not bear to see her suffer like this.  
  
"Wake up, Bell!" he said as he gently shook her from sleep.  
  
The spell broke and the opening of Belldandy's eyes reflected in whatever light shone through the window. Desperately relieved to see Keiichi's face, the goddess rose up and clung to him as tight as she could.  
  
Keiichi did what he could to calm her down as she choked back the emotions, saying, "It's OK, it's OK, you just had a nightmare."  
  
"A what?" Belldandy said in staggered breaths.  
  
"A nightmare--uh, a bad dream," he said, not finding the right words.  
  
Terrified, she looked at him, saying, "I've never had one before. It was so real!"  
  
"What happened?" he asked out of curiosity.  
  
"Well, I...I don't think I can explain, but--"  
  
"It's OK. They're not real. You just need to sleep, that's all."  
  
Belldandy nodded, and slowly lay back down into her bed. At first, she dared not close her eyes. "I can't," she said with a hint of defiance, "I- I won't!"  
  
Keiichi smiled weakly, as if to comfort her, "There's nothing to be afraid of, really!"  
  
The goddess took his words to heart, and held his hand, just to be sure of what was tangible and what was not. Slowly her gently face, covered with sweat, returned to calm, and her breathing returned from an erratic pace. Belldandy looked at Keiichi one last time. "Promise me," she said.  
  
"Anything," he replied softly.  
  
"Promise me you'll always be with me."  
  
"Always," he whispered to give comfort one more time to allow her to return to sleep. He watched Belldandy eventually fall back into unconsciousness. She gripped his hand a bit tighter as a warm smile grew on her face. Tired as he was, having been woken up in the middle of the night, Keiichi just could not miss the opportunity to see her like this, peaceful and gentle. And as he lay down next to her and drifted into his own sleep, he couldn't help but believe that, whatever their troubles at the time, there would always be moments like this that he lived for.  
  
---  
  
The morning was much of a blur for Keiichi, though not because of the lost sleep during the night. Once Skuld had gone to check up on Belldandy at daybreak, he spent much of the day sneaking around corners of the house, for fear that he could not possibly endure the wrath of Belldandy's younger sister.  
  
Eventually, it was all in vain.  
  
"Keiichi!" Urd called from outside, "Come out here, something's happened!"  
  
Keiichi limped into the hallway, holding his stomach, as if he were keeping it in place. Skuld walked two steps behind him, re-attaching her hammer to the back of her outfit.  
  
"Serves you right!" she said.  
  
"Unh," he groaned, "What is it, Urd?"  
  
They stepped outside and, there, rising up from behind the wall surrounding the temple and the entire residence was a gray cloud of smoke.  
  
"Where there's smoke, I guess," Urd said in an attempt to be witty.  
  
Off went Keiichi, rushing out onto the road to see what was the matter. In front of the temple grounds, there sat a car which was the source of all the smoke dispersing into the air. At the head of the car was a woman, a slender figure in contemporary business clothes. She appeared either a little older or a little younger than Keiichi, whichever it was he couldn't say. He watched her for a moment, kicking its bumper and mumbling words of frustration.  
  
"Stupid car!" she said.  
  
"Miss?" Keiichi asked, "Something the matter?"  
  
The woman turned her head, realizing now she had company. "I'm really sorry!" she cried, "The car just gave out and, well, I guess I'm gonna need a tow truck. Do you, uh, mind if I used your phone?"  
  
Keiichi didn't heed the question, and instead stuck his head underneath the hood, already popped open. Very rarely did he ever get to look at the inner workings of a car to diagnose a problem. "Looks like it might be...uh- huh, yeah, that might be it!"  
  
"What? What is it?" she asked.  
  
Keiichi looked up, holding a dipstick in his hand, "There's not a drop of motor oil in this thing! It was bound to break down!"  
  
The woman stepped back, distraught, "Don't you DARE say that! Not today!"  
  
"I'm afraid so," he said, regrettably.  
  
She tore out her hair, not knowing what to do. "I don't know a thing about cars, and I figured it was going to get me at the worst time!"  
  
"I'm sorry, it's--"  
  
"No, no! It's my fault!" she cried frantically, "I'm so far from home, and I'm so far from where I need to be by this time tomorrow, so something horrible was bound to happen, right!?"  
  
"Well--"  
  
She continued on, "I don't even have any money to fix the damn thing! And this is my parents' car, too! So where am I gonna go? What am I gonna do?"  
  
"I was, uh, just--"  
  
"There goes my career, right? Like the man said, 'Could've been a contender!' But no, that's it! Done in by a car!" The last of her rant flushed out of her system, the woman finally caught a breath and decided to calm down. She looked at Keiichi and said, "I'm sorry, I guess I'm having a bad day."  
  
"It's OK," he said, dumbfounded.  
  
"I just spent most of this morning driving up the countryside, and I still got another three hours to go, so I suppose I'm in the middle of nowhere and--I'm just going on and on, right?"  
  
"I wouldn't say th--"  
  
"No, don't. I just need something to go right today!" she cried before a long pause, "So, what we're you saying."  
  
"Well, uh," Keiichi said, waiting in between words for her to interrupt, before finally suggesting, "I could fix your car."  
  
The woman's jaw dropped ever so noticeably. "What did you say?" she asked in disbelief.  
  
"Yeah, I could put in some oil, and I think I have some spare parts in the back. Won't be good as new, but it'll get you where you need to go, I hope."  
  
Suddenly, her eyes lit up, having been saved by the kindness of strangers. "Oh my God," she exclaimed, "You are so cool!" She then stepped forward to wrap her arms around him. "I'm sorry, I never got your name. Miyo Ichikawa, at your service. Do I, uh, owe you anything?"  
  
"Keiichi," he said, glad to be of help, "Keiichi Morisato. And don't worry about it."  
  
"Ah!" she cried, "I love you, Keiichi!"  
  
Keiichi smiled, red in the face. Even more so, though, when he realized that someone, for some time, had been standing at the foot of the steps leading up to the temple.  
  
"Is something wrong?" Belldandy said blankly.  
  
Keiichi jumped, not knowing how to react. "Belldandy!" he said aloud. The mere appearance of it all...  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry!" Miyo said jokingly, "I didn't realize I was stealing him away from you!"  
  
Belldandy recoiled, quickly running the words in her head, "What?"  
  
"I mean, I didn't think I was taking him--no, I mean...your husband's agreed to fix my car!"  
  
Keiichi was absolutely floored. He was relieved to hear Belldandy laugh at Miyo's remark.  
  
"Well, uh," Belldandy said, laughing, "We're not really, um--"  
  
"Ah, I see," Miyo replied, "Well, anything's possible, I suppose!"  
  
"Keiichi, are you OK?" the goddess asked.  
  
"Yeah," Keiichi said, picking himself off the floor, "If I start now, I could have the car ready to go in a couple of hours."  
  
"You're kidding!" Miyo said, obviously surprised. Keiichi nodded, to which she said, "Isn't he great?"  
  
Belldandy agreed silently, "Yes, he is."  
  
---  
  
Miyo had a loud, bubbling voice, accompanied with an obvious penchant to talk anyone's ear off. She resonated throughout the house as she talked on the phone.  
  
"Yes...yes, absolutely!" she said into the receiver, "Well, of course! If I make the trip by tonight, I could be there by early morning, so...naw, don't worry about it! I think I'm good hands. Car's gonna be OK, but I THINK you're gonna need to look at it when I get...no, not at all. I can take care of myself! I trust them. Well, I'm not fifteen years old, I can take care of myself!"  
  
The words all meshed together and echoed in Belldandy's ears, as she prepared a light snack for everyone. Of course, she said nothing about it to Miyo, but she sure had an instant attachment to Keiichi! Once the food was laid down across the table, she went to summon the others. But as the goddess turned the corner, she stopped to listen in on her guest chatting incessantly on the phone.  
  
"He seems like a nice guy," Miyo said, with words that caught Belldandy's attention, "I dunno, apparently he's some sort of handyman, fixes bikes for a living, I think. Come on, it's not like I'm gonna marry him, I just said he's a nice guy!"  
  
"Ah!" Belldandy cried. She had leaned forward to hear better, and once her hand had slid off the wall, she fell clumsily onto the ground, causing Miyo to look in her direction. She had been caught in the act!  
  
"Are you OK?" Miyo asked.  
  
Red-faced and embarassed, Belldandy picked herself off the ground. "I'm sorry," she said, trying to find the words, "I-I...tripped."  
  
Her story had left her mouth before she could catch it and stop it from being heard. Belldandy had lied!  
  
"Oh," Miyo replied, then talking into the phone, "Well, I gotta go. Have to check up on the car. No. No. Yeah! Yes, I know. OK, bye!" She hung up the phone, saying, "Thanks for letting me use your phone!"  
  
"It's no problem at all," Belldandy replied, still shaken, "There's, uh, some food on the table, if you care for a snack."  
  
"That would be great," she said, turning for the doorway, "Why don't I go get your lover-boy and we'll all have lunch?"  
  
"My--what?" the goddess asked.  
  
Miyo looked back at Belldandy's blank stare, "Your, uh, Keiichi. Why don't I go grab him from outside and we'll all have lunch?"  
  
"Ah, yes," she said, understanding.  
  
The houseguest nodded one more time and off she went to summon Keiichi from underneath the hood of her car. She left Belldandy standing in the hallway, trying to piece together the sequence of events in her mind. The goddess did not see her older sister creep up from behind her.  
  
"Is it possible?" she asked, "I mean, is it possible at all?"  
  
"Urd!" Belldandy replied, startled, "I don't know what you mean."  
  
"Well, I don't know, you've always been so protective of Keiichi, but never like this!"  
  
"Oh, stop it!" she snapped, "Why shouldn't I be, when there's a--"  
  
Belldandy stopped in mid-sentence when she had realized that she had shaken Urd with her emotional retort.  
  
"I'm sorry, sis," Urd said softly, "I shouldn't have--"  
  
"No," Belldandy insisted, her face full of distress, "No, you're right. It's true, I've become so...so..."  
  
"Oh, come, now," she said, putting a hand on her shoulder, "Look at you, you're one of us after all!"  
  
They both laughed, if only to make light of a tense situation. Belldandy smiled softly, and asked out of ignorance, "Is that good?"  
  
---  
  
"Some days, I think my parents wanted a son," Miyo said in what appeared to be a very extensive monologue, "Else they wouldn't be sending their little princess to help run the family business."  
  
"Uh-huh," Keiichi said, still going at it underneath the car.  
  
"Of course, it's not that I don't like it. Well, the hours are pretty bad and some of the people I have to deal with are even worse! Still, I wouldn't miss it for the world, I guess."  
  
"Gives you a lot to talk about, I suppose."  
  
Miyo paused, and said, "Oh my God, I get that a lot. Do you think I talk too much?"  
  
"Well, uh--"  
  
"It's OK, you can be straight with me. I can go on and on for hours! It's making up for lost time, I think. I didn't have many friends at school. I'm not visually appealing, is what the guys would say."  
  
Keiichi rolled out from underneath the car, "I don't think so."  
  
"Naw, it's true! When I was in high school, I was an ol' shorty," Miyo said, unaware that she had finally caught his attention.  
  
"You don't say," he said, captivated.  
  
"Yeah. So, nowadays, whenever I have someone to talk to, I just, you know, talk their ears off! Force of habit, I know I shouldn't. Not many people had my dilemma, I guess."  
  
Keiichi shook his head in amusement, "You'd be surprised, Miyo. But, uh, anyways, I just need to replace a couple more parts, and you should be all set."  
  
"Really?" Miyo asked, "That's great! Well, don't you worry about it right now. I came here to tell you that your Belldandy made some lunch."  
  
"What?" he cried, "That was twenty minutes ago!"  
  
---  
  
Keiichi sat in between the two: Belldandy to his left and Miyo to his right. It seemed innocuous enough; in fact, he didn't notice at all. That is, until he noticed the expressions on the faces of both Urd and Skuld, sitting across from him and fully aware of what could be a tense situation.  
  
Miyo, on the other hand, was completely oblivious. She continued to talk everyone to near-death, as was her nature.  
  
"It's so hard to believe that all three of you are sisters!" she exclaimed.  
  
Belldandy, Keiichi observed, put on her best face and tried to hold it for as long as she could. "What makes you say that?" she asked.  
  
"Well, look at the three of you, no resemblance to each at all!"  
  
"You see, our family is, um--"  
  
"--Very unique," Urd interjected.  
  
"Oh, I'll bet! Listen, Belldandy, thank you for lunch, it was wonderful."  
  
"You're quite welcome," the goddess replied, smiling.  
  
"And you, Keiichi!" Miyo cried, grasping his hand and shaking it for everyone, including Belldandy, to see, "I don't know how to thank you!"  
  
"Well, I--" Keiichi began to say in a bashful tone. When Belldandy cleared her voice, though, he jumped inside and instinctively pulled his hand away. "It's nothing, really," he said with a bit more caution in his speech, "I just love doing it, that's all."  
  
"Oh, you're certainly good at it, I can tell you!"  
  
At that point, Belldandy couldn't stand it for one moment longer. From underneath the table, she sought help from her older sister, gently pinching her on her arm.  
  
"Ow! What--?" Urd said, then looked at her sister. "Oh, uh...Miyo, why don't I show you my lab? I've been cooking up some aphrodisiacs that can drive any man crazy!"  
  
"Really? In that case, sure, I'd love to check it out."  
  
"Wonderful," she said, taking Skuld by the hand, "Come now, kid, why don't we all go?"  
  
"What are you talking about?" Skuld asked, carried away by force, with her voice trailing off, "Let me go! Let me go! Let me..."  
  
What remained was a deafening silence between Keiichi and Belldandy. The two sat motionless at the table for nearly an eternity.  
  
At last, he spoke up, "Talk about bad timing, huh?"  
  
She, on the other hand, lacked the words to respond.  
  
"Bell, you know that I love no one else but you."  
  
"I know," Belldandy replied, almost whispering.  
  
"Then what--?"  
  
"I trust you, Keiichi! With all my heart, I trust you. It's just...HER that I don't trust!"  
  
The silence returned once more, as Keiichi searched for a hint of understanding to something he couldn't possibly consider about Belldandy.  
  
"Are you jealous?"  
  
She looked up once the question was posed. Finally, she was confronted with her dilemma. "I know I shouldn't!" she cried, "She is everything that I am not, and I can't help but wonder if that is what I could've been for you! That I couldn't have given you what you wanted!"  
  
"Belldandy," Keiichi insisted, "I want no one else BUT you."  
  
"I know that!" Belldandy shouted, "But this doubt, this dread...it's never been this strong before. I've never felt like this before!"  
  
He sighed, pressed into action to fix another problem. "I'm sorry, Bell, I guess I underestimated your feelings."  
  
Her feelings? He hadn't considered them?  
  
"Hold on," Keiichi said, "That came out wrong. But you're just going to have to trust me. Believe me when I say that when I walk out that door to finish fixing her car, I'm coming right back. OK?"  
  
Eventually, Belldandy nodded in agreement. She searched deep inside to find the trust that she had lost, but ultimately she put her faith in his pledge. "Go on, fix her car," she said.  
  
With that, he stood up and walked out, but not before getting in the last word, saying, "Jealousy can be good, I guess. It lets someone know how much you love them, and that you don't want to lose that. Thank you, Bell!"  
  
As the door slid closed, Belldandy was left all alone, pleasantly surprised. She had not thought of it in that manner, and without her Keiichi, she would have never considered it at all.  
  
---  
  
"Well," Miyo said, "I can't say it enough. Thank you so much!"  
  
"Don't worry," Keiichi replied, "You've said more than enough."  
  
"Oh, you joker!" she exclaimed. When she leaned forward, she kissed him ever so softly on the cheek.  
  
Belldandy gasped silently, but watched almost helplessly as Keiichi handed the keys to her car.  
  
"Will you make it in time?"  
  
"I probably wouldn't, if it weren't for you," Miyo said, "I just have to--"  
  
"Check the fluids on the way back, right."  
  
"Gotcha," she said, then turning to Belldandy, "Girl, let me tell you something."  
  
The goddess stepped back for a moment as Miyo drew closer, but stopped to heed her words.  
  
"Don't you ever let go of him, do you hear me?" she whispered, "Not for all the universe. Not for anything."  
  
"I won't," Belldandy replied, smiling, and finally changing her opinion of Miyo. At long last, their guest drove off in her car, off to wherever it was she needed to be. Both Keiichi and Belldandy waved goodbye as she drove down the road and disappeared into the horizon. Her words remained with the goddess, of course, and continued to echo deep inside. "Don't ever let go of him," the voice said, trailing off.  
  
---  
  
The clock had struck four. The dead of night would be no longer in a couple of hours, but as it turned out, Belldandy had been agonizing over yet another nightmare for much of her sleep. In fact, it was the same episode that she had experienced the night before.  
  
"No! Please!"  
  
She was helpless to stop it from happening, powerless to keep from watching it so curiously. Over and over in this dream, she stood from afar, and yet saw herself in the distance. There was Keiichi, too, right beside her. They were happy to be together, sure enough, but that was what was so heart- wrenching.  
  
"Don't, no!"  
  
Every so often, the spectre that resembled Keiichi inexplicably abandoned the figure that looked like Belldandy. For any number of reasons, it didn't matter. Every time, Keiichi left her behind, leaving the goddess in the distance behind in despair. As a final insult, the sequence would repeat all over again. There were slight nuances and variations, but the theme remained the same, and it was terrifying each time for Belldandy. Until, that is, she could bear it not one minute more.  
  
"STOP!"  
  
The door opened and, once again, Keiichi stepped through it. Only this time, the bed that server as a place for Belldandy to sleep was empty. The window to the outside was left open, but no one remained inside.  
  
"Belldandy?" he cried aloud, not concerned that there were others asleep. He flicked the switch on, and the glow of the light revealed a clue, a note atop the comforter on the bed. Keiichi knelt down to inspect it, and the words did not please him.  
  
---  
  
I'm sorry, Keiichi, but though you made a promise to me, it is I who must leave. Not for long, just to sort out those emotions that I am not fit to handle. I shall return, of that you can be sure. For now, please believe me if I say that I will never leave you, but until I can be confident of anything, I must simply leave. - Belldandy  
  
TO BE CONTINUED... 


	4. Listen To Your Heart

Only Human  
  
An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic  
  
By Roehl Sybing (indef@infinitedeferral.com)  
  
Chapter Four: Listen To Your Heart  
  
Belldandy was gone. There was no getting around it.  
  
Her two sisters and Keiichi returned after a long early morning of searching for her. The town was, all of a sudden, far too big for their liking. And as the sun climbed into the sky and the town began to fill up with those going about their normal business, it was quickly becoming no use to continue their search without having to take some sort of respite.  
  
"If only she weren't human," Urd said, upon sitting back onto the steps of the temple, "Then I could use my powers to find her. Otherwise it's just trying to find a needle in a haystack."  
  
"There must be something," a distressed Keiichi replied.  
  
"Well, it's not our fault," said Urd, as she and Skuld gave him rather nasty though unfounded looks.  
  
Keiichi stared them back, despite being on the wrong side of a mismatch, "Hold on, what're you blaming me for?"  
  
"Flirting with that woman yesterday, although you knew she didn't like it," Urd accused, "Real smooth, kid."  
  
"Wait a minute," Keiichi snapped, "You knew it too! But, of course, you never raise a finger to help anyone, do you?"  
  
"You better take that back, or--"  
  
"That's enough!" cried Skuld, who quickly drew their attention, "Big sister's out there all by herself, and we're stuck here fighting?"  
  
The two stopped to consider. "She's right," Keiichi admitted.  
  
The youngest of them all, strange enough, took charge, saying, "Now, I'm going inside to launch a few satellites, and when I come back, we're going out to find her, OK?"  
  
"Well, don't take too long," Urd said as Skuld walked past her.  
  
Said Keiichi, "I suppose we could use a quick br--"  
  
"And after I find her," Skuld said in his ear, "You're gonna get yours, mister!"  
  
As the youngest goddess stepped into the house, Keiichi dropped his head into his face, partly because of Skuld's half-credible threat, but more importantly because of having spent a great deal of time not sure of Belldandy's fate.  
  
Urd walked up to him, saying, "Don't worry. She wouldn't go far. If Belldandy's in town, she's not going anywhere."  
  
Keiichi looked up, "How do you know?"  
  
"She's my sister," she said, shrugging, "I know these things."  
  
---  
  
In fact, Urd was right. Belldandy had exhausted herself after so little sleep and so much running away that she had spent the morning curled up on a public bench in an out-of-the-way spot in the park on the edge of town. It was hardly a dignified position, but no one saw her, and when she was too fatigued to go on, she simply stopped and did whatever was necessary to grab some sleep.  
  
Perhaps it was foolish to run away. She was, after all, having second thoughts, those ugly moments of doubt and second-guessing and uncertainty that she had seldom before experienced. Usually, whenever Keiichi or Urd or Skuld was in a predicament, Belldandy was the one who took charge and decided what was best. With her mind so clouded by both wonderful and terrifying emotions, however, the goddess could no longer be so confident about it. At that moment, she wasn't even sure what was best for her. Such indecision made her feel...inadequate.  
  
The morning air was cold. Belldandy took off from the bench and walked around in search of some warmth. Besides that, away from the comforts of home, she didn't even know what she was looking for.  
  
One thing was for certain, though; she was hungry. She had spent the early hours of the morning tiring herself out and she needed some replenishment.  
  
---  
  
"Hey, what're you trying to pull here?"  
  
"It ate my money, mister!" said a boy, repeatedly hitting a ticket vending machine as the clerk behind the counter shouted at him. This conversation of sorts is what Belldandy heard as she walked through the restaurant door and sat down at the table to put down her things.  
  
"I didn't see you put no money in there, kid."  
  
"But I'm telling you the truth!"  
  
"This ain't no charity case, boy, if you want food, you better pay up or go somewhere else!"  
  
Either the boy, an urchin off the streets from his appearance, was just unlucky or purely desperate. He stood his ground, though, and insisted that he had the money and that it was simply lost in the machinery of the device on the wall. The clerk saw right through him, however, and was two steps from throwing the boy off of his property.  
  
"Good morning, ma'am!" a server said to Belldandy as he put down cloth and some water. But she paid him no mind, as her attention was directed towards the rather one-sided argument over breakfast money that never existed and an ordering ticket for food that remained inside the machine.  
  
Belldandy felt the texture of coins that rattled in her pocket. They were left over from her last trip to the store, not one week ago. She reached in her pocket and mentally counted them. It wasn't much - just enough for a bite to eat - but, all of a sudden, it was just enough to make her feel a sense of guilt.  
  
There was this boy that couldn't buy what he so desperately needed, out to be rejected one more time. On the other hand, she was tired and cold and hungry. And coupled with a sense of confusion that had been haunting her for the past few days, Belldandy couldn't help but think that she was feeling a bit desperate herself. But as she clenched her fists on the table she decided which one - that empty feeling in her stomach or the enormous sense of pity in her heart - would make her less unhappy. What troubled her, as she left her seat, was why it took her so long to choose.  
  
"Excuse me," Belldandy said, breaking up the rather heated argument. With one hand on the boy's shoulder, she took the change from her pocket and put it into the machine. The child pointed up and what he wanted, letting the goddess push the right button to dispense the order. "Please don't be upset at this boy," she said, handing the ticket to the clerk.  
  
The man nodded silently, and let the boy finally have a seat at his counter. As the child neglected to look back to offer a sign of gratitude, Belldandy would have been needlessly upset that she didn't get one, had she not used up what little money she had while still feeling deprived of nourishment. She left the restaurant shortly thereafter, and though she knew her decision to be the right one, her stomach needed quite a bit more convincing.  
  
---  
  
Eventually, her feet hurt more than her sense of hunger. It was a strange sensation. Every now and then the ground would be uneven; a rock here, a patch of grass there. Belldandy had thought she would just be left to her thoughts, but after quite some distance of walking she was quite fixated on the sharp pain in her feet, which translated into a dull but equally persistent pain that traveled up her spine. It was new to her, and Belldandy knew not where it came from and it frustrated her greatly, until she sat down and the pressure finally eased.  
  
From her seat in public, Belldandy looked around at all the passersby who hardly took notice of her. It was all she could do to take her mind off whatever it was she was experiencing. But her consciousness drifted to thoughts of Keiichi as a couple sat on a bench on the other side of the walkway from her. Of course, she couldn't hear what they were saying, but their body movement told everything. Belldandy especially associated with the girl, who pushed her partner away because he had come in closer for a kiss. She had made some excuse, while the boy tried to persuade her otherwise. As they argued, Belldandy thought about the other night. She ran her finger across her lips, trying to imagine what might have been.  
  
Her pleasant thoughts were broken suddenly, though, when the argument simply turned out to be too much for the couple, with the boy simply walking off, leaving the girl behind. She felt for the girl, whose face showed all the signs of distress. She ran off in the other direction, partly in tears, and it was then that the moment hit too close to home for Belldandy.  
  
She turned away, trying to force her mind onto other things. But, to her dismay, she would find no relief when her head turned to see a familiar sight.  
  
"Bell-dandy!" cried a voice that had a tone that could only belong to Sayoko. Her apparently new wardrobe, including a shopping spree's worth of bags in her hand gave away the motivation of her largely-superficial grin. Despite the woman having such a sly walk that turned all the guys' heads as she drew closer, Belldandy didn't understand that she was approaching her simply to insult her, with the plain and worn and insignificant clothes that the goddess wore.  
  
But as Sayoko put down her bags and bragged on about herself in place of proper pleasantries, a thought from Belldandy's unconscious emerged. It was dark and unpleasant and was hardly becoming of her and she didn't even know where it came from, but it stuck in her mind as she looked at Sayoko. For the very first time, Belldandy simply did not like her.  
  
"Now, as for you," Sayoko said, with the first words that didn't escape Belldandy's attention, "You do not look at all lady-like today. Look at you, all dirty and jumbled! Are you trying to play some trick on me again?"  
  
The goddess tried her best to put on a pleasant smile, saying, "I've been out of the house since this morning. It's been a long day."  
  
"Well, it looks like it," she said, offering no remorse. Belldandy looked in the other direction, and it was then Sayoko gave her a very studious look. She gasped, "Oh my, it looks like you have man trouble!"  
  
Belldandy looked at her again, her vulnerability apparently exposed. "Sayoko--" she said.  
  
"Well, well," her adversary interrupted, ready to pounce, "I guess everyone gets off their game once in a while, eh? But, boy, do you show it!"  
  
She stood up, ready to storm out. "Excuse me," she said somewhat forcefully.  
  
Sayoko watched her take two steps in the other direction, and clicker her tongue. "Oh, come on," she said, walking in front of her, "Don't be sore! Look, why don't you tell me about it, huh?"  
  
"I don't think so," Belldandy replied, shaking her head.  
  
"Come, now, let's grab a bite to eat, it's on me. I want to know all about how my dear friend here fell from grace!"  
  
As Sayoko wrapped her arm around her, Belldandy ignored an unexpected instinct to grit her teeth. All she knew was that she was quite offended by her mock pity. She knew, however, of pride, and that she didn't want to be a victim to it today. And the offer of a meal rang in her ears...  
  
"Alright," Belldandy said with humility.  
  
---  
  
"What time is it?" Keiichi asked half-heartedly.  
  
Skuld checked the clock, "We're coming up on thirty minutes. Should be any moment now."  
  
"Think it'll work this time?"  
  
"Hey, my devices always work! They just take a bit of trial and error!"  
  
"That's what I mean!" he cried.  
  
Urd slid the door open and stepped out to find Keiichi and Skuld sitting on the steps. "Did it come back yet?"  
  
They started to answer, but the three looked from afar as Banpei slowly wheeled itself onto the temple grounds. The initial disappointment set in as they realized that, obviously, Belldandy was not behind Banpei, but Keiichi gazed in curiosity as it carried a plastic bag in its hands.  
  
"What's he got?"  
  
"Oh, that must be for me!" Urd said. She rushed up to Banpei as it stopped in front of the temple, and took its contents. The two on the steps gasped in plain disgust as Urd happily removed the item from the bag. "Now we're set for the next few days!" she said, treasuring the liquor that Banpei had brought for her.  
  
"Urd, you idiot!" Skuld cried angrily, "Banpei was supposed to be on the lookout for Belldandy!"  
  
"Yeah, what gives?"  
  
"I must've forgotten to tell you guys," Urd replied, taking a step back from their hostile advances, "I reprogrammed Banpei to get this for me."  
  
"Urd! How could you--!"  
  
"Well, the stupid thing didn't find her the first gazillion times you sent it out! And the cupboard is absolutely dry, Keiichi, you haven't filled it in ages!"  
  
"That's not the point, Urd!" Keiichi replied in futility, "And it wouldn't be empty if you didn't keep drinking my stuff without asking!"  
  
"You see? Now you know what the problem is!"  
  
"Grrrr," was the sound Skuld made as she examined Urd's makeshift reprogramming of her Banpei. Urd, oblivious to everything, walked back inside.  
  
Keiichi tried to stop her, saying, "The hell have you been doing in there all this time? Shouldn't we be out looking for Bell?"  
  
"She will turn up, trust me," she said, not turning around, "Besides, I've been on the phone in there. I've got some really great news."  
  
---  
  
Sayoko sat there with her mouth agape. Her eyes twitched in bewilderment as Belldandy told her why she simply had to get some air that morning. The guest, her car, the tension, everything. She tried to piece together in her mind what had happened, filling in the holes where details didn't exist. In the end, after a few sips of her drink and a couple moments of silence between her and Belldandy, she burst out laughing.  
  
"That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard in my life!"  
  
Belldandy did not understand or grasp the humor of it, and sat there, still thinking her dilemma a dire one. She waited for Sayoko to calm down, and then said, "What?"  
  
"I'm sorry, really! I shouldn't have!"  
  
"I'm serious!"  
  
"Yeah, yeah, I know. I really don't know what he sees in--no, you know what? Scratch that--you two were made for each other," she said, scoffing.  
  
"Yes, we are," Belldandy insisted.  
  
"Well, I don't mean whatever silly reason you think it is! I mean...you two are so childish! You've been living under the same roof since forever. He must really love you (I don't know why), and the sight of another woman makes you worry? That's for the books, my friend!"  
  
"I keep telling you," Belldandy said, "It's not that I don't trust him--"  
  
"I understand what you're talking about, you've just never felt you've had any competition before!" Sayoko cried, "I wish I could've been there to see your face!"  
  
That did it. With an emotionless composure, Belldandy laid her tablecloth down in front of her and rose up, saying, "Thank you for the food, Sayoko, I think I'll be going--"  
  
Sayoko, however, was not finished. She grasped Belldandy's hand and leaned forward, saying in a wicked tone, "You know, Belldandy, Keiichi won't be a boy forever. He's got to grow up sooner or later."  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about."  
  
"Well, let me tell you, honey," she said, smirking, "One of these days he's gonna wake up and want something more from a woman, something that you don't have. When that happens, he'll--"  
  
The diatribe broke suddenly once Belldandy could not stand to hear one more word. It was almost involuntary, but she took her free hand and struck it against Sayoko's cheek.  
  
Belldandy gasped. Sayoko's face, red from the force of her hand, was one of shock. She covered her mouth out of instinct, and looked on in wide- eyed trauma.  
  
"I'm sorry!" Belldandy said, all of her rage having left her and replaced with intense contrition. She ran out of the eatery with all of her might, unable to continue with Sayoko for another moment.  
  
---  
  
The tears ran down Belldandy's face as she tensed up in fear over what she was suddenly capable of doing. Did she just hurt someone? And did she gain some undue gratification from it? The questions were terrifying to consider. She didn't want to think about it, but Belldandy had to own up to what she had done. Naturally, she had to go back to apologize to Sayoko- -  
  
Oh, but what she said! So harsh, so biting, she had deserved what was coming to her!  
  
No, no, there was no excuse for her action.  
  
But what she said...they weren't true, of course. She knew a lot of things that had crossed her mind lately weren't true. All of them, however, were hard not to believe. Belldandy wanted so much to dismiss what her feelings were telling her. But their pull on her was so strong, that she was simply rendered frozen to make sense of anything.  
  
At that point, after much frustration, Belldandy realized that a low point had been reached. It was better for her to have just stayed at home, where she understood many things. And she was too tired and too drained to go on. She had had enough. Her time to herself had come to an end. So, then, began the long and dreary trip back to that...easy...comfortable...place called home.  
  
---  
  
Skuld rushed outside once the sound of Keiichi's motorcycle could be heard from inside the temple. It was absolutely certain that he didn't find Belldandy; she went outside anyways, hoping against hope.  
  
"Did you find her? Did you find her?" she said, jumping all over Keiichi. He shook his head, much to her disappointment. "Well, we can't quit now!"  
  
"I have to put some gas in my bike," Keiichi replied downheartedly, "I'll go out again in a couple of minutes." He did his best to screen out most of Skuld's nagging as he headed for the work area behind the temple. He was too busy blaming himself.  
  
Was he just too stupid to pick up on any of the warning signs? Or was it that he just didn't want to believe that anything was seriously wrong? That one time where he was, without any effort at all, so strikingly close to Belldandy must've really made him turn a blind eye to everything else. His selfishness was going to cost him something quite dearly.  
  
A dejected Keiichi took the things he needed and headed back out to his bike. If it took him all night and much longer, Keiichi was going to find Belldandy and get her back. With everything ready to go, he got back on his bike and prepared to set off again.  
  
He was determined to find her this time. Why, he could almost hear those happy sounds when the moment would arrive.  
  
"Big sister!"  
  
Keiichi turned around, surprised. Only one thing would prompt such a noise.  
  
---  
  
"Belldandy?" Keiichi cried, almost tearing off the door of the entranceway.  
  
Sure enough, there she was, exchanging happy greetings with Skuld. Her next move, once she looked his way, made her wrap her arms around Keiichi, holding him tightly as if to never let go.  
  
"I'm so sorry," Belldandy said softly.  
  
Keiichi choked back a bit of laughter, saying in a lighthearted tone, "Just don't ever scare us like that again!"  
  
"What were you doing out there, sister?" Skuld asked curiously.  
  
"Did you do what you needed to do?"  
  
"Well," Belldandy said, beginning to sit down on a chair, "I'm not sure, really."  
  
"Tell us later," Keiichi replied as he took her hand, "Urd has some wonderful news!"  
  
Urd stepped into the hallway, like clockwork. "Is that who I think it is?" she asked.  
  
"Urd! It's so good to see you!" Belldandy cried, running up to embrace her as well.  
  
"I know," Urd replied confidently before catching herself, "I mean, it's good to have you home."  
  
"What did you want to tell me?"  
  
"Oh, that's right! I got--"  
  
"--They called us today!" Skuld interrupted eagerly, "They figured out how to make you normal again!"  
  
"Isn't that wonderful?" Keiichi asked.  
  
Naturally, they all waited with delight for Belldandy's response. They knew she would be happy. No, they knew she would be overjoyed. Much to their surprise, though, she took a step back from Urd. She tried her best to glance at all three of them, but ended up turning away, sitting back down on the seat to find some degree of comfort.  
  
"Sister?" Skuld said.  
  
"What is it?" Keiichi said.  
  
Belldandy struggled to speak, "I...I don't want to."  
  
"What?" the other three cried.  
  
"I said...I want to stay like this."  
  
TO BE CONTINUED... 


	5. She's Got A Way

Only Human

An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic

By Roehl Sybing (indef@infinitedeferral.com)

Chapter Five: She's Got A Way

Keiichi was having one of those mornings.  The kind that appeared when the day before was so hectic and stressful that he could barely recall the details so quickly after waking up.  His head rested between his arms, his face just an inch above the surface of the table, as his ears picked up sounds that barely resembled words from those around him.

"Some more tea?" Belldandy asked.

"Yes, please!" Skuld replied.

Half-exhausted, Keiichi couldn't be sure at all, but from the sound of it, Belldandy was as happy as ever.  Her sisters sounded happy, too, so there seemed to be absolutely no reason that Keiichi should be unhappy.

"Don't mind him," he heard Urd say as she patted his head in a teasing manner, "He's glad that you're home."

"So am I!" Belldandy said.

He had this feeling that he should be relieved, but Keiichi was so tired that he was thankful that at least his head was firmly attached to the rest of his body.  He began to recall what happened just before he collapsed onto his bed so late at night.  There was an argument of sorts, in which Belldandy was quite insistent.  Urd also had her voice raised as loud as possible then, causing Keiichi to be in the room where he experienced a level of ferocity that he had never before seen in Belldandy.  Then...Skuld stormed out of the room...crying.  Through all this, Keiichi still could not recall why.  He did remember that they all made up at the end of a very long heated discussion, and called it a night.  What was it?  What had he forgotten?

Then, Urd snuck it in. "So, how about we give the Almighty a call today?"

"No," she replied, unflinching.

Keiichi lifted his head from the table. "Good morning," he said, with all the memories flooding back.

"But sister!" Skuld said, "It won't work unless you agree to it!"

"I don't want it to work," Belldandy replied, "THIS is what I want!"

Before he could say anything - before he could think about what to say - the conversation had deteriorated again into argument.  More polite this time, more cordial this time, as Belldandy held her ground while her sisters did the same, only now trying desperately to prevent a repeat performance of last night's debacle.

Keiichi was having one of those mornings.

---

It resorted to Belldandy unexpectedly isolating herself in her room, at the first opportunity that Urd and Skuld began to instinctively argue between each other.  Keiichi returned just upon their realization that they had let their sister get away from them.

"Belldandy?" he asked, pressing against her door.

"Please," she replied from inside, "Not now!"

Keiichi stepped back for a moment.  It hurt for him to hear her plead in such rare frustration.

"I-I just want to talk, can we--"

"I can't!" Belldandy said firmly, "I want to, but--"

Her voice trailed off, leaving Keiichi with only questions.  It was almost a given that she would want this, to be returned to normal and have her powers back.  Not just because it is who she was, but that the past few days had obviously been so stressful for her.  The emotions, the impulses, the physical pain...she couldn't possibly want to endure more of it!

Keiichi pleaded some more, either to come in or for her to come out.  His attempt to draw closer to her was in vain, but it invited Urd into the hallway to observe.

"No luck, kid?"

He shook his head. "I've never seen her like this!"

"Maybe," Urd suggested, "Maybe if you told her that it's what you want, she'll go along with it."

Keiichi flinched.  An instinctive reaction, but he was totally unprepared for what Urd was asking. "Uh," he said hesitantly, "Yeah, maybe."

"'Cause, you know, making you happy is what makes her happy, that's all."

"Long as she's happy," he said, shrugging his shoulders, slowly backpedaling away from Belldandy's door.

"Keiichi?"

"Yeah?"

"What are you doing?  Tell her now!"

He stopped.  Of course Urd was insistent, she was her sister.  Difficult as it seems at first glance, she loved her.  She wanted what was best for Belldandy.  She wanted...what she thought was best for Belldandy.

"Keiichi!" she commanded.

"What?" he asked, still frozen.

"Keiichi," she said, moving up to him with suspicion, "Am I mistaken, or is it that--"

"I don't want to lie to her, Urd!" he blurted out suddenly.

Now he did it.  The damage was done, and it stunned her.

"Oh, ho-ho," she said, "I see now."

"Urd," Keiichi pleaded, "It's not my call, and--"

"What kind of a man are you?" Urd demanded, "Are you afraid that she will hate you?"

He gasped, but quickly recollected himself.  For once Urd had got it wrong.  Had this been another place and time, her comic ignorance would have been amusing.  Yet...

"You're wrong," he said, confidently shaking his head.

The two of them stood there in silence, as Urd narrowed down the possibilities until there was only one reason that Keiichi would not do as she asked.

"That's quite unlike you," she said, "Being so selfish like this."

"Urd, hold on, now--"

"Can't you see my sister is in pain right now?"

"Only because you are forcing her!  I haven't done anything to upset Belldandy!"

"Well, you have to do something!  She's obviously not thinking clearly!"

"Says you, I'm not so sure."

"Of course you're not sure!  You don't know what it's like being like us.  I know what it's like to lose my powers, and I won't have that for Belldandy!"

"Fine," Keiichi cried before storming off, "You talk to her.  It's not my decision!"

Urd was left in the hallway in front of the door to Belldandy's room. "Ooh, that little worm!" she said to herself, before marching out as well.

The sound of the wood floor creaking underneath footsteps came from inside the room, with Belldandy sliding the door open and taking a look out into the hallway.  She looked towards the direction where Keiichi had gone, and gave up a soft smile, one of relief.

---

Keiichi worked on the upkeep of his motorcycle to try and cool down his temper, heated up after a round with Urd.  But he understood.  For the moment, he could not believe himself.  Maybe he wouldn't be able to convince Belldandy to change her mind, but perhaps he was being selfish too.  He tried to convince himself in his head that Belldandy returning to normal was best.  He was even able to concede that at the end of the day that it might very well be true.  In his heart, though, Keiichi wanted other things, the most important of them being an ounce of doubt, some evidence that it was wrong.

The wrench in his hand moved as far as it would go, and before Keiichi knew it, he was tightening a bolt on his motorcycle with needless force.  Lost in thought and worry, the wrench gave way, right after he had succeeded in stripping the bolt so that it could not be removed.

"Oh, dammit," he said quietly, gathering his bearings in the real world.  From his position on the ground, he searched for the wrench that had skipped some distance away from him.

"Here you are," Belldandy said, once picking the tool off the floor.

"Thanks," he said.  Keiichi took it from her before he realized who it even was, and went back to work for half a moment before stopping himself.

He turned around, and smiled, saying again, "Thank you."

That was the face he missed, the glowing smile of Belldandy that had been absent within the temple all day yesterday.

Instinct drove Keiichi to his first question. "You seem tired lately.  Are you OK?"

Belldandy nodded as she sat down on the seat of his motorcycle, "I think so, yes."

"Where did you go yesterday?"

"I just walked around, searching for answers."

"And did you?" he asked.

"Yes, I did," she said confidently.

"Well," he said with curiosity, "Tell me about it!"

She looked away, up and into the sky, watching a bird soar through the air. "I found a flyer yesterday," she said, "There's a fair in town."

"Now, don't change the subject," he said.

"I'm not!" Belldandy replied, "Take me there, Keiichi.  Please?  I'll tell you everything."

The goddess reached for Keiichi's hands, and eagerly held them tight.  It naturally made his heart grow wings and start to fly, but given everything he had to be just a bit more cautious.  On any other occasion, Keiichi would not have hesitated for a number of heartbeats.  Still, the choice would have been the same.

---

"So, what are we doing here?"

"Anything we want."

"I don't understand."

"Here, no one can disturb us."

"Yeah, I know, but here--?"

By this moment, Urd and Skuld would have long found out that they were gone.  That's alright, Keiichi thought; if yesterday was any indication, it would be difficult to find him and Belldandy.  And amongst the various, bustling crowds at the local fair, the two of them blended in with all the rest.

The area was nestled inside a park, with only the tallest rides and attractions - and an occasional balloon that had been let go by a child - rising above the trees.  At the heart of the fairgrounds sat a small lake, surrounded by a dirt path that made for a lovers' paradise, a place for couples to share their affection within a scene of beauty.

"Keiichi," Belldandy said, "What's wrong?"

He gave a quick look around at all the romantic pairs around him. "Nothing, I just--" Keiichi said, before looking back.  There, at the edge of the lake, on a patch of green grass, sat Belldandy, with her hand outstretched.

"Come here," she said, "Sit down."

Confidence welled up in the goddess' eyes as Keiichi saw a side of her that he had seldom seen when it came to the two of them.  As a goddess, a sister, and at times a fighter, Belldandy often took charge with wisdom and resolve.  As his partner and best friend, things were always a bit more innocent, and a whole lot simpler.  Today, however, seemed to be a very different day.

Keiichi sat down right next to her, hand in hand. "Is this what you wanted?"

"Mm-hmm," Belldandy replied.

He smiled back at her, liking where the whole situation was going. "So," he said, "What was it that you were trying to tell me?"

The goddess clutched his hand a little tighter.  They both looked down, and then at each other.

"This is what I want," she said.

Keiichi smiled, not quite knowing how to react to such feelings.  All this time, he was still no good at it.  He searched for words, and images of the morning came to the surface.  The breakfast, the argument, the clash with Urd...

The words let themselves out of his mouth. "Are you sure?" he said.

Belldandy broke their contact, pulling her hand towards her.  She looked at him strangely, saying, "What do you mean?"

He caught himself, mouthing the words to make sure he had said what he thought he said.  A look of dumbfoundedness played all over his face, as he stumbled for yet more speech. "I...I...well..."

"I thought you understood," Belldandy said sternly, "Or at least that you respected what I wanted."

"Yes, I do!" Keiichi replied, "It's just that...your sisters, they're worried that--"

"Do you believe them?"

He was taken aback, "What?"

"Do you believe them?"

Belldandy looked at him.  She glared into his eyes, searching for honesty, and Keiichi couldn't betray her. "I-I don't know."

Disappointment was read all over the goddess, and quickly she shot up and turned away.

"Even you don't understand what I'm going through!" she cried, right before storming off.

Keiichi heard his own labored breathing.  For the very first time, their relationship was treading through unsteady territory.  No relationship was perfect, of course, but that was no consolation to him, as he quickly followed after her.

---

One after the other, Belldandy and Keiichi zig-zagged through the pairs of lovers down the path, and his chase after the goddess led them back onto the main fairgrounds.  Belldandy's newfound mortality, however, made the pursuit rather shortlived, as she was the first to stop for air after a winded run.

Belldandy pressed her hand against an upright surface, feeling the beating of her heart with the other hand.  Keiichi was not far behind in catching up to her.

"Belldandy," he said once he drew near.

The goddess still searched for breath, saying, "I'm sorry."

"I probably shouldn't have--"

"No," she replied, looking up at him, "I was overreacting.  I guess I still need time to sort everything out."

Keiichi returned her smile once she stood upright again, but still showed concern. "Is this what you really want?"

"Yes!" she replied with great resolution, despite her emotions being all jumbled.

"But why?" he asked, "You must be suffering, trying to adapt to it all.  And you can be a goddess again, so why--"

"Does it go away?" Belldandy replied, "The suffering, does it go away?"

He paused before giving an answer. "Well, yeah," he said, "But you don't have to put up with the trouble."

"I want to."

"Why?" Keiichi asked again, insisting on a real response, "There must be something."

Belldandy gently touched his cheek, smiling softly at Keiichi.  It took her a moment to frame the words together. "It's--" she started to say, "It's because of--"

Suddenly, a dust cloud kicked up in front of them, at the exit of an attraction of which all the children stormed out.  They acted as rowdy as children should, running right through and past Keiichi and Belldandy, in the way of the next ride.  An instant passed before the crowd of children were out of reach, but not before the goddess toppled to the ground amidst all the commotion.

Keiichi looked down frantically, "Belldandy!"

"Ouch!" she said instinctively.  She sat herself up on the ground, and felt the tinge of pain on her hands and legs.  A bit of dirt concealed a very slight flesh wound on the upper part of her cheek, but patches of red could not be hidden as it showed itself on her left knee.

"Oh, no," Keiichi said, kneeling down, "You're hurt--"

"Stop!" Belldandy cried as she covered her knee with her hands, "I can handle it."

"We should probably get it looked at," he insisted.

"No," she mumbled with a hint of pride, "I can take of myself."

"Belldandy..."

"It's OK, really!"

Keiichi conceded, despite what looked like a not-so-everyday bruise.  As he extended his hand towards her, the least he could do was help her up.

"I'm fine, I said," Belldandy replied to his gesture as she tried to pick herself off the ground.  As powerful as she once was, she was determined to at least rise from a bad fall, the simplest of tasks.  But a quick gasp, and a rough landing back onto the dirt offered her some humility.  At the moment, and much to her dismay, she was quite incapable of helping herself.

Belldandy winced, saying to Keiichi, "You must think I'm--"

He left his hand extended, despite her feeling the slightest bit embarrassed and expecting unintelligently a laugh or two. "Everyone needs a hand up once in a while," Keiichi said softly, "It's part of being human."

The goddess looked up at him, focusing on his outstretched hand, washing away all of her refusal to submit to dependence.  She saw her pride at that moment as arrogant, and dismissed it, taking Keiichi's hand instead.  A lesson she could not learn on her own, a sense of humility returned to Belldandy at a time when she was most seriously tested.

---

"She said that?"

"Yes, and that's when I slapped her."

"Belldandy!"

"I know.  I'm not proud of it at all."

"Well, I can't believe she said that to you!"

"That doesn't matter.  I shouldn't have, and yet, afterwards, there was this feeling...of..."

"Of what?"

"I think it's...satisfaction."

They reached the front of the line of the food stand and took what they needed for a lunch break while sitting on a nearby bench.  Most of their time at the fair involved a lot of walking around, with an occasional children's ride thrown in for amusement.  As far away from the temple, from her sisters, and from a phone call to the Almighty, as possible.  That suited her just fine.

On the surface, and for the moment, it was the same old Belldandy, who enjoyed the simple pleasures of life, who easily took joy in everything she did, and who made every moment that Keiichi experienced with her worth living.  Her smile, her eyes, and everything about her made it difficult to tell what she had been through lately.  It was Belldandy, without a doubt, the goddess that Keiichi loved.

Yet, to hear her speak was nearly frightening as it was fascinating.  It was not just listening to Belldandy say that she almost enjoyed hitting Sayoko for a few unkind words, though that was what really made Keiichi that he was getting in over his head.

To Keiichi, she was the same, and she was very much different, but none of it explained why Belldandy, for whatever reason, would want to remain as she was.  Only that, beneath the surface of her behavior, she had acquired a rough edge that made being around her a little more...complicated.

"It's not true," Keiichi said, "What Sayoko said, it's not true."

"Uh-huh," Belldandy replied, "I know."

Distracted and unconvinced, she broke away from him, walking towards one of the attractions.  Keiichi was certainly dismayed; for all of his persuasions and reassurances to ease her doubts, he was not reaching Belldandy.  He clenched his fists in frustration, trying to restrain himself as she walked about with the impression that she was out of her element.

He walked around Belldandy and stood in front of her, pleading to her, "I don't care what anyone else says!  I love you!  I love no one else but you!"

Belldandy smiled weakly, and looked away, saying, "The way things were, you can't be happy forever.  I know that now."

"What are you talking about?"

"At least like this, there's a chance I can--"

"Stop it!" Keiichi replied, being the most insistent he had been in quite a while, "You may have your doubts, but I don't!  What do I--"

"Something more from a woman," Belldandy mumbled to herself, the sound of Sayoko's voice still fresh in her mind.

"What?"

She remained silent for a moment, then turning her head to Keiichi and pointing up, saying, "Let's go on this ride."

Keiichi's jaw dropped.  He knew not how to react, but finally gave up trying to win any argument, if one existed at all.  He looked up at the roller coaster pointed out by Belldandy.

"OK," he said.

---

Belldandy's sudden desire to do something impulsive slowly disappeared as she and Keiichi waited in a moving line for the mini-roller coaster.  She watched the passengers zoom by, moving up and down and turning in all directions at an unnerving pace.  In her stomach was that feeling again.  Fear.  Adversity.  But for as long as she could remember, Belldandy had never backed down from anything in her life.  It is only now, in her current state, that she had felt this threatened.

"This is safe, right?"

"Yeah, it should be," Keiichi replied, "We've been in races more dangerous than this."

"I know," Belldandy said, "But this is different."

"What do you mean--oh," he said.  He looked down at the makeshift bandage that covered the goddess' knee - a reminder of her mortality - and understood that, without the powers that made her a goddess, things were quite different.

"There's nothing to be afraid of," he said, "That's all part of the fun."

Another wave of riders raced past them as they continued to wait in line. "See?"

"What if the restraints don't work?  Or it stops in the middle?  Or there's--"

"Alright, alright!" Keiichi said, laughing but all the while trying to comfort her, "I guess there are risks.  That's why some people don't ride roller coasters, it makes them afraid."

Belldandy asked curiously, "What about you?  Don't you have any fears?"

Keiichi's head dipped down, "Yeah, I guess.  To tell you the truth...I'm afraid all the time."

"Really?" she asked, tilting her head, "Of what?"

"Of losing you," he thought, not saying it but smiling at her to avoid the question.

More riders zoomed by, but this time Belldandy and Keiichi were in the next group to get on board, just as soon as the ride was emptied.

The goddess looked at him again, "I guess if you face up to your fears..."

"It's the only way," Keiichi replied, taking Belldandy by the hand and leading her into the seat next to him in one of the cars.

"Just relax," he said, "I'll be right here."

Belldandy nodded as the ride jerked forward and started on its way.  All this time, a gut feeling deep inside of her made her hesitant to follow through on her desire, but it was too late to turn back as the restraints kept her firmly planted to the seat.  She would have to take what was coming to her.

The first bump in the track was easy, a quick rise up and a sudden drop offered a chance to elevate Belldandy's heartrate and anxiety.  Her pulse quickened and she let go a nervous laugh to let Keiichi know that she was still there.  She felt his arm wrap around so that his hand could hold her shoulder, and a slight sensation, a feeling of security, enveloped her as another climb in the track led to a more precipitous decline and an unsure, angled turn to the left.

The ride sped up from the pace to which the goddess had just grown accustomed.  The pressure began to mount as she and Keiichi looped around a steep turn.  Suddenly, another drop in the track, and it seemed that this roller coaster ride could not get any more turbulent.  Either that, or Belldandy couldn't bear another second of it.  She wasn't sure.

Yet, she opened her eyes again, after ducking down for a brief second to shut it all out.  The car evened itself out, and Belldandy realized that she had just sped past another rise and fall in the track, all without her noticing.  As the sight of the track in front of her flashed by, the anxiety in her stomach had suddenly disappeared.  Her breathing was still rapid and her heart was still racing, but the goddess ignored it all.  She could focus on the ride in front of her, and Keiichi by her side, and in confronting her adversity Belldandy was no longer afraid.  Of course, the roller coaster could still be unsafe, her seat could give way or the ride could come to a sudden halt.  But there was no use in worrying about it now, and even as helpless as she felt, Keiichi was holding her close, ever present to the end.

The final turn in the track revealed a very steep uphill climb, most surely to be followed by the biggest, and most exciting, drop back to where they all started.  Belldandy took one deep breath and held on tightly to Keiichi, not with uncertainty, but anticipation.

---

The ride stopped at the beginning, and as all the other riders began to leave so that others can take their places, Keiichi looked at Belldandy.  During the whole time, he was trying to keep his own stomach in check.  For him it was thrilling, if only unsettling enough for him not to do again too soon; it must've been too much for her to tolerate, but at least it was over.

"That was...wonderful!"

"Huh?"

"Let's do that again!" Belldandy said eagerly.

A stunned Keiichi looked at her, "You mean you liked it?"

"Well," she replied, trying to get it all out while catching her breath, "It was so terrifying at first, and for a moment, I didn't believe that I would make it, but...it just became so exciting!"

"Yeah," he said, "I guess that last turn did everyone skip a beat."

"No, that's not it!" Belldandy cried, naturally helping Keiichi away the roller coaster, "I was afraid, like never before.  And then...I wasn't!  I faced my fear, and it disappeared.  It's a wonderful feeling!"

He nodded his head, happy for Belldandy, but unable to say it as he rested partly on her.  Perhaps he was more uncomfortable than he thought.

"Let's come back later to do this again!" she insisted.

"Unh," Keiichi groaned, "Don't be so hasty!  Oh, no, I think I'm gonna..."

---

"That's what I've been trying to tell you!" Belldandy said, "This is what I want!"

They had returned to the lake at nightfall, and sat with everyone else on the grass, with a perfect view of the fireworks above.  All the while, Keiichi tried to reason with her, "You won't have your powers.  You won't be able to fulfill any wishes.  You won't be able to do your duties--"

"Right now," she interrupted, "My duty is to be by your side, and I don't need any powers to do that."

"Yes, but why would you want to--"

Belldandy took her hand and placed it on Keiichi's thigh, much to his surprise. "I get...a feeling," she tried to explain, "When I do something like this, there's a feeling, and I think I like it.  I've never felt it until now, when I'm...human."

Keiichi gasped, as Belldandy's hand pressed against his thigh.  He knew what she was feeling, as he also experienced it.

He asked jokingly, "You won't run out on us again, will you?"

The goddess laughed, and shook her head, "I'm still frightened by it all...these new emotions can be so powerful.  But I just need to conquer these fears, and I'll...maybe I'll be able to truly make you happy."

"You never needed to anything more to make me happy."

Belldandy leaned forward, "Not like this.  Not like..."

Keiichi focused on her lips, drawing closer for a kiss.  He couldn't possibly disappoint her, so he held her chin before making his move.

"Wait!" Belldandy cried, and broke away.  She giggled nervously, "I'm sorry!"

"It's OK, it's OK," Keiichi replied.  He was beginning to get used to being this close without actually having it.

She shied away, "I believe I still have more to learn."

"So you won't change your mind."

"No.  Does that disappoint you?"

"I just want you to be happy, that's all."

Belldandy smiled, and leaned her head on his shoulder out of exhaustion. "I can be.  I will be."

"So," Keiichi asked out of curiosity, "How will you explain this to the others?"

"I don't know," she replied, closing her eyes and yawning, all the while making a brief, amateur attempt at humor, "I've been making it up as I go along."

He laughed softly at her ability to dodge the question.  Then Keiichi looked up suddenly, as a flare lit up the sky and burst into a light pattern that amazed all those below.  The fireworks had only begun, and it caught his attention.

"Look, Belldandy," he said.  Yet, when he looked down at the goddess, she had already drifted off to sleep, after a long and eventful day.  Keiichi sighed, gently bringing Belldandy down to rest on his lap.  He looked at her as the light of the fireworks reflected on her delicate face.

"You're wrong," he said to her, "Nothing can make me happier than this.  But...you're welcome to find out."

TO BE CONTINUED.


	6. Another Perfect Day

Notes: Not quite comfortable with the precedent that ff.net has set regarding censorship, I am still contemplating leaving ff.net altogether (the thing about New Yorkers and grudges: we hold them, and WE DON'T FORGET *g*), and setting up shop on another public archive. The conservative paranoids can keep their squeaky-clean safe-for-children environment - or better yet, they can stick it in a place in the body part that light cannot reach, if you know what I mean. You will be given notice if/when I do leave for greener pastures. So stay tuned. :)  
  
Only Human  
  
An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic  
  
By Roehl Sybing (indef@infinitedeferral.com)  
  
Chapter Six: Another Perfect Day  
  
"Keiichi!" Belldandy called out. The temple grounds were not terribly large, so she was absolutely certain that he had heard her in the three times that she tried to summon him. Belldandy could only presume that Keiichi was still preoccupied with worry and concern. So, she went to him, walking back up the steps and finding him standing in the doorway of the main residence.  
  
"Keiichi," she insisted, "They will come back."  
  
He nodded in return, though he continued to stare through the doorway and into the now-empty hall that connected all the other rooms. Keiichi and Belldandy, both so exhausted from the day before, did not bother to check up on Urd and Skuld when they returned from the fair very early that morning. It was only after daybreak when they woke up and discovered that Belldandy's two sisters were, in fact, gone. When they left was not so obvious, but to where they went was almost apparent.  
  
Belldandy knew full well that her decision to remain human would have hit a nerve, if not with her sisters, then with others in the Heavens. Whatever her reasons, Urd did not approve, and Belldandy did not yet know the extent of her superiors' patience. Whether they would be accommodating or otherwise, she would find out in a matter of time, that time depending on how fast her sisters were at blowing the whistle.  
  
Keiichi, on the other hand, was entirely ignorant of the coming storm brewing about Belldandy, and was consigned to just fix his gaze inside the temple and ponder. "It's so quiet," he said, not knowing if he should be relieved or concerned.  
  
"Please don't worry about Urd or Skuld," pleaded Belldandy, "They did what they felt they had to do."  
  
Keiichi looked at her, "And what about you?"  
  
She responded by shrugging her shoulders playfully. "I have seldom asked for anything for myself," she said, "But I have only one reason to be selfish."  
  
A gentle breeze passed through the two of them, as Belldandy stepped closer and stood right up to him, as if to press her body against his.  
  
"You would think that Urd would approve," she whispered, "That I don't think I could be happier than this."  
  
Keiichi's heart skipped a beat, feeling his cheek touch her cheek ever so slightly as they looked past each other. "You've never been selfish before," was all an ignorant Keiichi could find to say to her.  
  
Silence stood between them for a long moment, until Belldandy moved back half a step, if only to giggle and admire him.  
  
"Oh, Keiichi," Belldandy said with a half-mocking tone in her voice, "That's why I love you, you can be innocent when you need to be."  
  
"Huh?" he said, taken aback.  
  
"No, that's good, I meant!" she corrected herself, "Maybe you'll understand someday. But right now, we have to get to campus, there is a race that we have to practice for!"  
  
Keiichi took her arm in arm, adoring her new sing-song tone that beckoned them off the residence and on a motorcycle towards Nekomi. "You seem so eager today."  
  
"Shouldn't I be?" Belldandy asked as they walked, "It's barely midday, and there's so much to do! So much life to experience, so many chances to make today better than yesterday!"  
  
"Well, if you say so, then I can't complain."  
  
They hopped onto their seats and prepared to leave, one more confident - or at least more daring - than the other.  
  
"Say, Keiichi, I think I'm ready for...what's the word? Intimacy! That's it!" she said nonchalantly and in almost one unbroken train of thought spoken aloud, "I'm not too sure of the specifics...but it sounds like something that we should be doing, and since the house is left to the two of us, I don't think I'll ever be more ready..."  
  
A startled Keiichi, rolling his eyes without Belldandy looking, knew not how to respond. "I don't think I'M ready..." he said underneath the sound of the motorcycle engine.  
  
Belldandy looked up, "Did you say something?"  
  
"Huh?" Keiichi said, shouting above the noise of the engine pretending that her voice was indistinct. He tapped the side of his helmet, signaling that he couldn't hear a word.  
  
"Oh," Belldandy replied, then mouthing the words "I'll tell you later, then" right before she and a relieved but wide-eyed Keiichi sped away from the temple grounds.  
  
All the while, a figure watched from afar the motorcycle turning onto the main road. She marked her concerns down in her log, officially opening her inquiry.  
  
---  
  
"Are we going to do our best?"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
"And are we going to win this weekend?"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
"Then let's get to it!"  
  
A roaring applause and fanfare among the members of the motor club greeted Keiichi's rallying cry. He stood in front of all of them, and couldn't help but think that he was part of something great. He was proud of his fellow club members, as they set aside the next two days to prepare and practice for the weekend race, one of the most important races on the club's calendar.  
  
"Well?" he said, once the fanfare turned into a scattered applaused, which in turn faded into a deafening silence that kept them all waiting for another word of leadership from Keiichi. "What're you guys waiting for, let's get cracking!"  
  
"Oh!" said one.  
  
"Right!" another said.  
  
"Of course!" came from a third.  
  
The crowd before Keiichi meshed and mixed as bodies bumped together and struggled to determine where to go, and finally turned into a scattering of club members, each of who slowly attempted to ascertain their purpose for the day. It was a peculiar sight, and had it not spoiled Keiichi's moment of pride, it would have been amusing to him.  
  
"It's difficult sometimes, isn't it?" a voice said from behind Keiichi.  
  
He turned his head, and saw a woman standing some distance away from where the impromptu rally took place. "What do you mean?"  
  
"Rallying the troops, giving orders without bossing others around, hoping to inspire your fellow man. It's a task, I tell you."  
  
Keiichi watched her approach him. She was a short but slender woman, not terribly imposing and having the look of being able to blend into a crowd without standing out. The no-nonsense type that was all work but little else, while having a sense of warmth about her that made her easily likable at one's first encounter.  
  
"I suppose so," he replied, "The leadership thing just kinda fell on my lap, though. What about you?"  
  
"Oh, me? I was merely thinking about my boss. I'm just a follower."  
  
"I see. I'm sorry, I didn't get your name. You are--?"  
  
She looked at him as if she couldn't find what to say. She paused to ponder, and then laughed without an apparent reason. "Excuse me! No, my name's not important. I won't be here long, just hanging around to see what's what."  
  
"Oh, alright," Keiichi said, "Um, you were thinking about joining the club?"  
  
"No," the woman with no name said yet again, "Not really. Just...checking things out, that's all."  
  
"Right...hey, you're not a spy for another club, are you? Trying to figure out our secrets before the race?"  
  
"What?" she said angrily, taking offense and unexpectedly raising her voice, "Are you accusing me of deception!?"  
  
Keiichi backed down quickly, "No, no, that's not it! I'm sorry, I didn't mean anything by it!"  
  
"Oh," the woman replied, all the tension having instantaneously fizzled into nothing. "Well, in that case, don't worry about it!"  
  
Keiichi looked at the woman turn from curiosity exemplified, to focused anger, to undirected contentment, bordering on happiness. He was easily confused, so he said nothing, save a small mumble under his breath to concur.  
  
"Anyways," she continued, "I wasn't aware there was a race this weekend! Tell me, please, what's the race?"  
  
"The race?" Keiichi asked, "Right, the race...well, seven other clubs from around town are joining in, and all of us compete on a road course. The course has been designed specifically for sharp and sudden turns, and the natural inclines make it difficult to handle the curves if you're not expecting them."  
  
"Sounds like an ugly metaphor," she said.  
  
"I guess. Two-passenger machines are equipped to handle courses like these, but we suspect it's going to take some creativity to handle the type of curves that are on this course," Keiichi replied, looking at everything before him, the club members, the drawing boards, the scattered parts, everything. "We have to build a machine completely from scratch, one that's built for speed, control and reaction time. Sometimes you can make up for bad reflexes with good control, but a course like this will be very unforgiving."  
  
"So it's not just about speed?"  
  
"Exactly. Fastest time wins the prize. But if you deviate from the course, the race is over for you."  
  
"I get it! That's why Belldandy is riding left seat with you, right?"  
  
"Yeah, that's right," he said, then pausing for a moment before asking, "You know Belldandy?" The woman took a half step back, startled by the question and not being able to catch herself. "Me? No, I don't!"  
  
"Then how--?"  
  
"Well," she said, fumbling for the right response, "You mentioned her in your little pep talk, remember?"  
  
Keiichi pondered it some, then answered, "No, not really."  
  
"I could've sworn you mentioned Belldandy! You said something like, 'Let Belldandy and I be just a small part in your victory this weekend!'" she said, trying to imitate Keiichi, "Right?"  
  
"I don't think I ever said anything like that," he insisted.  
  
"But, but,"  
  
"Aw, but who cares about details, right?" he said while checking his watch, "Anyways, I'd love to stay and chat, but there's a lot that needs doing. Take a look around if you want, just don't touch anything, we got some very delicate stuff we're working on!"  
  
The woman breathed a sigh of relief as she watched him run off to do his task. Almost caught.  
  
Twice, that is. She quickly ducked behind an obstruction in reaction to the sight of Belldandy walking nearby. For a very brief moment they exchanged the slightest-possible passing glances in each other's direction. The unnamed woman could only hope that she was not recognized.  
  
---  
  
Belldandy intercepted Keiichi in the clubhouse overlooking the makeshift work area, as others outside worked to get parts together and assembled in short order but in top condition.  
  
"Keiichi?" she asked, "That woman...who was that?"  
  
"Hm? Oh, just someone who was curious, she wanted to know what was going on."  
  
"I see," Belldandy replied, unconvinced.  
  
"Belldandy?" Keiichi asked curiously, smiling at her, "You're not jealous, are you?" She looked at him, failing to keep underneath the surface a hint of disdain, "If I was jealous, surely I would let you know it."  
  
Keiichi backed away, apologizing, "I'm sorry."  
  
A long face wrote itself all over Keiichi, and Belldandy couldn't help but watch the consequences of her words. She had never made him feel that way before. "No, I'm sorry," she said, quickly coming over to be close to him, "I don't know why I said that."  
  
He shook his head, "It's okay, it's nothing."  
  
"It's just that...I could've sworn I've seen her before."  
  
"Not me," Keiichi said, "Who do you think it is?"  
  
"I don't know," Belldandy replied, "Ever since the - you know - my memory has been clouded. It takes a little more effort to recall. Names, faces, even memories...they're all there, but it's just not so clear anymore. One of the drawbacks of being...ordinary, I suppose."  
  
"Well, let me know if you remember who she is, and if you need any help."  
  
"Alright," she said, before taking Keiichi by the arm and stopping him on his way out. She asked, "Why do you put up with me? I mean, after everything the past few days."  
  
Keiichi took a good look at Belldandy, and replied, "When we first met, you asked if you were a bother, remember?"  
  
She nodded her head.  
  
"After all this time, I haven't changed my mind. But, even if you don't believe me, at least let me take care of you when you are a...bother. It's the least I can do for, well, everything."  
  
She knew Keiichi long enough to recognize a response that came from the heart. Her heart flew as she, out of instinct and without much notice, planted her lips firmly on his before she could change her mind about it. It was a very brief moment of contact, and not much passionate about it, but it was a pure display of affection, and it was enough to leave Keiichi absolutely paralyzed.  
  
Belldandy, on the other hand, was frantic. She laughed hysterically, "That was...that was...that felt so...oh, wow! I have to, uh...excuse me, I'm just going to..."  
  
Her voice trailed off as she happily left the clubhouse, not noticing that Keiichi was in a state of delusion that could only be created by a dream come true.  
  
---  
  
"Belldandy!" Sora said as she approached to her.  
  
"Oh, hello, Sora," Belldandy replied while still in a state of euphoria.  
  
"I-I just wanted to say," she said, demonstrating that she was always in awe of Keiichi's girlfriend, "You look different today. It's very nice."  
  
"Why, thank you. I...feel different. It's a great feeling."  
  
"What is?"  
  
"Being human."  
  
Sora looked at her curiously, "What do you mean?"  
  
"Well, it's...it's..." Belldandy tried to say, attempting to explain it to Sora, but recognizing that she wouldn't understand her circumstances, "Never mind. What are you doing right now?"  
  
"Me? I'm just taking this box of parts over to the garage to get them assembled onto the machine."  
  
"That sounds like fun!" she quickly presumed.  
  
"Nah, it's a lot of work. I don't mind, but I think the fun is in the racing. Until then, it's work."  
  
"Nonsense!" Belldandy retorted, "Let me help, I can always try something new."  
  
She looked up at Belldandy, "Really? You mean it?"  
  
"Sure! The sooner we finish, the sooner we can try it out, right?"  
  
Sora nodded, "Right! I could use a helping hand anyways, let's go!"  
  
---  
  
The woman found that she did have some sort of a fascination with these primitive machines that were caught in her observation as the day wore on. They were not the primary focus, of course. She stuck to the job that she was given without hesitation. All day, she managed to avoid meeting Belldandy's gaze while still keeping an eye on her as she moved from task to task, from component to component as mechanical parts acted like puzzle pieces, grouping together to form larger pieces until, eventually, the finished product is complete. The woman saw in Belldandy a look of satisfaction and pride as she worked handily on a number of mechanical components, flowing from one area to the next while having a good time.  
  
The unnamed figure kept one eye on Keiichi as well. Keiichi, despite doing the same routine of working on various pieces of the vehicle in development, was unaware that Belldandy had joined in the preparation. All he knew that, instead of having time to make suggestions and get feedback in order to improve the initial designs, he had to spend time trying to fix a costly fault created by subpar workmanship each time he was lucky enough to catch it. To say nothing of the faults that he had not yet caught, six hours into assembly. It was the simple things: parts were not being welded properly, nuts and bolts were not securely fastened, or delicate components were damaged in the process of being assembled.  
  
Whatever the reason, Keiichi didn't know who was responsible for putting the wrong effort into assembling parts. Maybe it was one person, maybe it was several people. With the full membership of the motor club coming together for this big race, Keiichi couldn't tell who it was. Not that he wanted to chew them out, but time was slowly becoming a factor in the hours of the late afternoon.  
  
"Run for cover, everyone!" a person said as he and several others scrambled out of the garage. Keiichi picked his head up to see what was the matter. From the garage, bits and pieces of metal came flying out in all directions, and a cloud of black smoke slowly drifted outwards and up into the sky.  
  
"Say, Sora," Keiichi said, quickly getting used to the growing predicament, "That big chunk of metal, would that happen to be the engine?"  
  
Sora turned her head at two angles just to be sure, "I think it is, sir."  
  
The incredulity continued to mount on top of Keiichi as a club member ran across the work area.  
  
"Help me! Somebody help me! AIIIIEEEEEE..." was the sound he made as he inexplicably ran from the passenger seat, somehow running on wheels and under its own power, prematurely supplied.  
  
Keiichi looked on, just stunned, "Well, I've never seen it do that before."  
  
"Me neither," Sora replied, if only to fill up an awkward silence.  
  
Belldandy came into sight, coincidentally after the episode of mayhem died down. She kept her hands together, clutching her sore palms and fingers. She and Keiichi exchanged looks.  
  
"I'm sorry for keeping you, we should've been out of here one or two hours ago," Keiichi said. She looked around, "What happened?"  
  
"Well, among other things, we need to replace the engine, chase down the passenger seat, and last time I looked, remove a heck of a lot of added parts from what was supposed to just be the steering wheel."  
  
Luckily for Belldandy, Keiichi wasn't looking at her. He would not be able to see, for the first time, her look of wide-eyed shock, and the internal attempt to keep herself calm. The natural response that came to mind was to just not say a word, something that may haunt her later, but Belldandy could not possibly worry about that.  
  
Especially when she could focus on another matter.  
  
"That IS her!" she cried to Keiichi. She pointed the woman out while she was not paying attention to them but rather the bit of chaos engulfing one part of the work area. "I can't believe I didn't recognize her at first, but it's her!"  
  
"Who?" Keiichi said.  
  
"Wait here."  
  
"What, what is it?"  
  
"Just wait here, I'll take care of this," Belldandy said, exhibiting a bit of undirected anger. Keiichi watched her storm away. Given the tone of her voice, he certainly didn't want to argue with her, let alone get in her way.  
  
---  
  
"Whoa, this is pretty amusing," the woman said to herself as she examined the mess all laid out in front of her. Under the pretense that she didn't want to interfere with the important work handled by the club members, she stayed more or less an observer tucked away largely unseen by most. She laughed a little at the comic atmosphere of it all.  
  
"I'm glad you're enjoying yourself," said one voice behind her.  
  
She knew that voice, and could only turn around to see the face of one seeking answers and fast.  
  
"Belldandy! How nice to see you!" the woman said. She had never seen Belldandy angry, but something inside told her that it was better not to know what it would be like.  
  
"What do you want? Are you spying on me?"  
  
"Take it easy," she said, "I was going to let you know in good time!"  
  
"I'm sure you know by now I won't go back. At least not now," Belldandy insisted.  
  
"That's ridiculous! Do you imagine what you're giving up, and what that means to the rest of us?"  
  
"If you could only realize what I have been through in the past few days, maybe you wouldn't be so quick to judge."  
  
The woman scoffed, "Come now, Belldandy! You know that it is not up to me to judge. And it may not be your place to choose either!"  
  
"Who sent you to come look for me? Was it Urd?"  
  
She nodded, "Urd got called up, yes."  
  
"And my big sister told you to find me and convince me to change my mind, is that right?"  
  
"Well..." the woman said, drifting away.  
  
Belldandy looked in her eyes and insisted, "What? What's going on?"  
  
"Don't you get it, Belldandy? EVERYBODY sent me after you!"  
  
TO BE CONTINUED... 


	7. Tell Me Lies

Note: This will most likely be the final story I will post on fanfiction.net. I don't agree with their policies and me and management are not on the same page. The rest of this story will continue to be published to ff.net but further fanfics from me will have to be read on the FFML or my website at www.infinitedeferral.com. In the meantime, Chapter Seven is here, enjoy!  
  
Only Human  
An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic  
By Roehl Sybing (indef@infinitedeferral.com)  
  
Chapter Seven: Tell Me Lies  
  
"I already found her," said a very stern Belldandy, once her sister walked into the room. Belldandy and their new guest had already been home half an hour before Urd and Skuld materialized back on Earth, and were expecting them at the elder sister's insistence.  
  
"Bell, I can explain--" Urd started to say, wearing a smile and a face she knew how to wear a million times before, whenever she was found out.  
  
"Shut up."  
  
The two of them looked at her in stunned silence, startled at her sudden response. Urd, especially, was unable to adjust, despite expecting it in that very moment.  
  
"W-what did you say?"  
  
Even Belldandy still could not believe the sound of her own voice. "I said...I said...Urd, how could you!?" she cried, failing to regain her composure. She stormed out of the room in a hurry, not wanting to choke up a tear in their presence.  
---  
Keiichi, from the second they arrived home, did exactly as he was told: sit in front of the television set and stay out of the impending storm. He was still not aware of how greatly he had underestimated the seriousness of it all. He was just happy that the motor club, after making up for lost time, was still on schedule for tests on the new model in the following morning.  
  
"Keiichi!" Belldandy called from outside the room, with the sound of footsteps telling the rest of the tale.  
  
He turned his head towards the doorway, and Belldandy was already in sight, rushing up to him.  
  
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Belldandy apologized, as if Keiichi required one. Like a small child that had broken something valuable, she collapsed onto him seeking some sort of redemption.  
  
Keiichi held her gently, confused about the matter, "What happened? What's the matter?"  
  
Belldandy looked up, with a few tears in her eyes, "I didn't mean to...I was just...Keiichi, I'm so sorry!"  
  
Her face fell again onto his shirt and she sobbed uncontrollably, never before having said such sharp words at her sister.  
  
"It's alright," Keiichi said by default, "Whatever it is, it's going to be--"  
  
"Please hold me, Keiichi," she pleaded, feeling his grasp on her begin to loosen, "Just hold me..."  
  
He nodded, and supported the weight of her body against his as she searched for breath while in his arms. He looked down at Belldandy, with her eyes closed to keep the rest of the world out. She felt the warmth of Keiichi's body as her cheek pressed against his chest. As she faded away, all she knew was that she was comfortable, relaxed. He made her feel safe.  
  
"If I could just stay like this forever," were her last words before the sounds of anxiety and distress turned to ones of gentle and quiet sleep. Belldandy had slipped into unconsciousness, resting quite comfortably on Keiichi.  
---  
"Yeah," said Keiichi, nodding his head a number of times during Urd's explanation of events. "So, what's her name, then?"  
  
"W-Well," Urd stuttered, "We don't really have a name for her. She's just the Assistant."  
  
He sat back, looking confused, "Right. The Assistant...to who?"  
  
Urd put down her morning tea and stared blankly across the table at Keiichi. She took her hand and pointed straight up.  
  
"Ohhhhhhh."  
  
"She only ever pops her head out to investigate when things go badly. That's why we had to leave; she wanted to question us before making any decisions about coming down."  
  
"And it appears I was right," said a confident voice coming from the direction of the doorway. Sliding the door shut behind her, the Assistant sat down and helped herself to some tea.  
  
"What about?"  
  
"It's quite clear, isn't it?" the Assistant asked after taking a sip, "You saw her last night. We all did. Goddess First Class Belldandy is obviously not capable of handling what is happening to her."  
  
"That's not true!" Keiichi quickly retorted, "Who are you to say anything about Belldandy?"  
  
Almost as immediately, the Assistant snapped back, "I have the authority, Keiichi. I have every right, and it is my firm recommendation that Belldandy is a mess! Wild and uncontrolled emotional expressions, taxing physical burdens, flaws in her decision making...and the absence of her powers, just to name a few! She is clearly not fit to discharge her duties. You are very lucky I don't decide right now to nullify your contract!"  
  
"Hey, you can't do that! Urd, tell her that she can't do that!" he pleaded. But the very slight expression of confirmation found in Urd nodding her head only confirmed that the Assistant was quite capable.  
  
"Belldandy must be up by now," the Assistant said before stepping out, "Why don't I go check up on her while Urd explains it all to you?"  
  
A blanket of silence fell over the room for a moment once their guest had exited the room. Both waited the other to speak.  
  
Finally, Keiichi did, "What did she mean?"  
  
Urd looked up. "Long ago, the Assistant renounced her license, her name and her status as a goddess so that she could work directly for the Almighty. In exchange for giving up her privileges, she was given great power and authority to watch over the rest of us. She is responsible for monitoring Helpers, in search of any abuse or negligence while on the job. Only under the most extreme circumstances is she called upon, but when she is, the Assistant has complete jurisdiction in the field, short of rendering final judgment. She has to make an official recommendation to the Almighty about what to do with Belldandy, but until then, the Assistant is free to execute any temporary remedies as she sees fit. She's very...VERY good at it," she said with a trace of contempt towards the end.  
  
"Urd, you have to help me."  
  
"Keiichi, it's more complicated than you think. Belldandy's accident really created some shockwaves in the Heavens, you don't know what--look, NO ONE opposes the Assistant! And I'm not sure that I want to, either. The changes in Belldandy, it's just--"  
  
Keiichi looked down at her with disbelief, "I would think that you, of all people, should be happy for Belldandy, for all that's happened!"  
  
Unsteadily, Urd shook her head, "I may say things from time to time...but she's my sister! I don't expect anything more than what she is, and neither should you!"  
  
"Fine, deal with it how you want, but I'll stand by Belldandy if you don't mind!"  
  
With that, he stormed out of the room, leaving an uncharacteristically distraught Urd behind to sort out her feelings on the matter. Both were pretty much in their own minds, unconcerned at the moment with how each other felt, though it was clear that they were both narrowly focused on Belldandy's welfare.  
---  
"C'mon, Belldandy!" the Assistant said, banging on the door to the washroom, "Get out here this instant!"  
  
Keiichi walked by to notice her persist with the door. From outside the washroom, he could hear Belldandy. She was moaning and muttering to herself, obviously growing frustrated.  
  
"What's wrong?" he asked.  
  
Replied the Assistant, "Look, you try and deal with her then, alright?"  
  
She stepped aside and let Keiichi attempt to draw Belldandy out of the room. Belldandy continued to mutter indistinctly in between staggered moans. Keiichi knocked on the door.  
  
"I said go away!" she cried.  
  
"Belldandy?" he said.  
  
A pause, then a gasp before Belldandy said, "Keiichi?"  
  
"Yeah. I made some tea, but it's getting cold, so if you want--"  
  
"Please, I just need to be alone."  
  
"Why? What's wrong, Belldandy? You can tell me."  
  
"I'd rather not. Please, I'll be alright, just give me some time."  
  
"Well," Keiichi said while looking at the Assistant, "We're all rather concerned about you out here. Perhaps if I gave a hand--"  
  
"No! I can take care of it myself!" Belldandy refused sharply. Before Keiichi could respond in kind, what was heard afterwards was the sound of moaning from within the washroom once again, as if she were in pain.  
  
"This is nuts!" Keiichi said to himself. Worried about what might be happening to her, he made the decision of forcing the door open.  
  
"Ack!" sounded a startled Belldandy when Keiichi, the Assistant, and now Skuld, who was passing through, got a good look into the room.  
  
Skuld cried as loud as she could at the sight before the three of them. "What happened, Sister?" she asked hysterically.  
  
Keiichi stared blankly with his jaw half-dropped. The Assistant, on the other hand, was doing her best to contain her amusement, even as her lips quivered, ready to burst into laughter.  
  
"I just can't get it to agree with me this morning!" Belldandy said, pointing at her hair with one hand and holding a brush with the other. What was normally long, flowing strands that beautifully complemented her appearance was, for the moment, a tangled mess that dispersed into all directions. "I begged you not to come in here!" she demanded before slamming the door shut again.  
  
Outside the room, the three of them stood frozen in time, as the occupant inside resumed struggling with her hair and the task of straightening it out. Her moans, obviously from the resistance of the tangles that refused to give, continued to be heard through the door. One simply walked away, shrugging his shoulders. Another laughed, finally unable to hold it all in. A third pleaded with the other two, "That's not funny! Hey! Where are you going? Why are you laughing?"  
---  
He had not seen her since, but after a while, it seemed to Keiichi that Belldandy had eventually settled down, now that he heard both her and the Assistant talking to each other. For certain, there was a sense of urgency in the Assistant's voice, with Belldandy trying to alleviate her concerns. Their voices were still indistinct as he turned the corner in the hallway, but he was beginning to just barely grasp the gravity of the situation.  
  
"Internal affairs," he thought to himself.  
  
He tried to conceive the idea that he just might lose Belldandy to the Heavens. After all, perhaps his wish in the very beginning was the most unusual of all, and that goddesses living on Earth seemed to be a first ever since. Perhaps this was the best opportunity to have Belldandy recalled from a binding contract, and no one dared to let that chance slip away.  
  
Or perhaps he was being paranoid. In any case, he was afraid of even the possibility that it might happen. Without a doubt, the Morisato residence was a very big place for just one person to occupy by himself.  
  
Lest he be accused of spying, an innocuous pop of the head inside the room where the two of them argued couldn't hurt, Keiichi thought, and it wasn't like it was a confidential meeting. Not that it was likely he would be able to easily understand, either. From the corridor leading up to the room, their voices could finally be made out.  
  
"This is not about this contract and you understand that!"  
  
"But you're trying to have it revoked, and I won't stand for it!"  
  
"Well, if you want to keep it in effect, you know what you have to do."  
  
"I cannot! This is important to me as well."  
  
"It's certainly not more important than--"  
  
As they argued, Keiichi was certain that there was not really a golden moment to intervene. But he had not seen Belldandy all day, save for the incident earlier that morning. Besides, there wasn't any real harm in peeking in--  
  
"WHAT are you doing?" said the Assistant the second Keiichi caught her eye, "Explain yourself!"  
  
"W-w-w-well," Keiichi replied, taken aback and consigned to stuttering as a response to such a commanding voice, "I-I-I just...you-you see, I...th-th-there's...uhhhh..."  
  
"Please, don't be upset, it's only Keiichi," said Belldandy, standing up for him from across the room.  
  
"Yes, I--Belldandy!" Keiichi exclaimed, turning his head. Another novel sight sat before him.  
  
"Do you like it?" Belldandy asked, clearly blushing.  
  
Keiichi stood and gazed with a look of astonishment. Her light-tinted hair, once delicately long, was now cut short to just above shoulders' length. Whatever the compulsion, a new look accompanied a relatively new Belldandy.  
  
"I thought I'd try something different," she said, her voice now dropping, "You don't like it?"  
  
"Yes, I do!" he replied at once, "It's-it's...wow!"  
  
"Thank you," Belldandy said, giggling, "I knew you would be happy."  
  
"Ahem!" the Assistant said, once finding herself all of a sudden out of the conversation, "This ought to be proof enough for you, Keiichi. What other impulses does Belldandy have for us next?"  
  
Keiichi replied innocently, "But I like it."  
  
The Assistant nearly fell sideways in reaction. It bothered her greatly that everyone she knew was, at least, a little uncomfortable by Belldandy's overall change, but that the person most affected by it, in the end, didn't mind at all. She picked herself up, saying, "Keiichi, may I have a word with you? Belldandy, we're done for now. Please leave."  
  
"B-But," she insisted, "This concerns me as well, I--"  
  
"Belldandy!" snapped the Assistant. Never before was her authority challenged by a fellow colleague, and though she half-expected it, the first time was quite unsettling to her. So unsettling that Belldandy sensed it in her expression, and as a result left the room, but not without trading a warm smile with Keiichi on the way out.  
  
Keiichi was directed to the space across the room where Belldandy had sat. As he got comfortable, the Assistant shot a look of scorn at him. He was supposedly the first person that should be displeased, and she did not understand why it was not so.  
  
"Keiichi," she started to explain, "Perhaps if I could just wrap your mind around the repercussions that could take place if we allowed ourselves to let Belldandy refuse to undergo the reversal process. It's such a delicate time right now and you probably don't understand. Well, I'm sure you don't understand. A mere human just couldn't. Unfortunately, that's the way it--"  
  
"Try me," replied Keiichi softly.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Explain it to me. Ever since I met Belldandy, the things I've seen in this place, all the wonders, I--just try me."  
  
The Assistant paused for a moment to consider, and then nodded her head. She stood up and paced, as if to make a presentation. "Yggdrasil," she explained, "The system is responsible for a great many things, most of which pales to the upkeep of the Earth. The world cannot survive without Yggdrasil, you understand that, right?"  
  
Keiichi nodded.  
  
"Okay. This one incident, it severed Belldandy from the system. For a goddess, being stripped of one's powers, it's akin to a punishment. No one had ever considered otherwise. A goddess rendered powerless, it's just too terrible for some to even contemplate. I guess we shouldn't be surprised that Belldandy found something good in it, huh?"  
  
"That's her nature."  
  
"That, it is. Ever since she became human, a lot of us in the Heavens have been monitoring her. Why shouldn't we? She's one of the finest goddesses ever to grace the system. When it became clear to us three days ago that Belldandy actually wanted to remain as she was, even when she had the opportunity to return to normal, it was a shock. It was a huge shock, Keiichi. The goddesses have been talking about it ever since. Belldandy was not only at peace with remaining human. She was happy! And then they started to wonder if humanity was preferable to what they had. Even I...I--no, not me. That's just not me."  
  
"But what does it mean?" Keiichi asked.  
  
The Assistant looked at him, approaching him and almost pleading with him using only the look on her face, then saying, "Keiichi, Belldandy's severance...we don't know how to duplicate it yet. But now that there's this...envy among us in the Heavens, one of us will want to try. The tension over the last few days is only beginning to grow. What if it affects how the system is run? What does that mean for this world? Keiichi, I have to ask, and you have to ask yourself. Do you really want to be responsible for this magnitude of trouble?"  
  
Keiichi snapped, "That's unfair."  
  
"It's completely unfair, Keiichi!" the Assistant cried, "But what Belldandy has done to all of us can't be ignored. The Almighty...you see, the Almighty grants each and every one of us a form that best suits us, that works to the best of our abilities. Some of us become human, others become gods or goddesses, even demons. It is a delicate balance, one that must never change. We must not ever change what we are!"  
  
The words echoed in his ears and his mind tried to analyze it all. He came up with only one question, "What you just said, they're two different arguments, aren't they?"  
  
The Assistant was caught speechless. She gritted her teeth, stood back and took a deep breath. When she once sought for understanding and sympathy, she now demanded consensus. "Keiichi, I will do everything I can to keep from resorting to any arbitrary judgment. But I need you to help me. You MUST convince Belldandy that she is making a mistake. It is crucial that you persuade her to undergo the reversal."  
  
He considered the weight of the consequences and that what he did might have a huge effect on those consequences. Was the threat real, or was it simply all a bluff? For sure, it had to be somewhere in between, so in any case, perhaps something needed to be done. His heart, though, was telling him otherwise, that it was best not to risk being conned into changing something that wasn't bad, but in fact good. All that mattered to Keiichi is that Belldandy was happy.  
  
"All that matters to me is that Belldandy is happy," he said.  
  
She bit her lip. Apparently, Keiichi would not budge. But patience in her job was a requirement, and patience she needed to exercise right now. "Very well," she replied, "Why don't I give you some time to think it over, to think about what we're talking about here? I'll be here for a while, so don't expect me to take my leave. Just think it over, alright?"  
  
With those words, the Assistant left Keiichi in the room, leaving the door open to let the stillness of the moment air itself out into the corridor. After a minute or two in which Keiichi remained firmly where he sat, Belldandy returned to check on him.  
  
"Keiichi?" she asked.  
  
"Yes," he replied, looking up.  
  
"You seem unsure about something," she replied perceptively.  
  
Keiichi laughed a little, saying, "Yes. We just finished our little talk."  
  
"What did she say to you?" Belldandy asked, sitting down next to him, "Wait, don't tell me. No, I want you to tell me. On second thought, maybe--"  
  
"Don't worry, Belldandy. If you don't want to know..."  
  
"But, I want to know! Oh, it's just killing me! Yes, I want to know!"  
  
"Okay, it's that--"  
  
"Wait a minute," she interrupted again.  
  
"What!" Keiichi cried, "Maybe we should--"  
  
"Lie to me, Keiichi," Belldandy requested, "Lie to me. Tell me that everything's alright. I know it's wrong, but I think I can do with some of that right now."  
  
Keiichi, eager to keep Belldandy's anxiety at a minimum, was happy to oblige, "Alright...the Assistant told me that it was all firmly in my hands. Whatever we want, she'll abide by it."  
  
Belldandy smiled and nodded cheerfully and graciously. Then her face fell ever so slightly, and she leaned against him, saying, "I don't want to go back. At least not yet. You understand that, do you?"  
  
"Of course I do!"  
  
"Tell me, then...that you love me enough to support me no matter what."  
  
"Well," Keiichi said, "I don't need to lie to say anything of the sort."  
  
She closed her eyes with contentment, "That's good."  
  
TO BE CONTINUED... 


	8. Look At Me Now

Only Human  
An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic  
By Roehl Sybing (indef@infinitedeferral.com)  
  
Chapter Eight: Look At Me Now  
  
The test course was set up and waiting. The vehicle was rolled out to the start line. Spotters at various points beside the track were equipped with stopwatches and radios. Those in front of the clubhouse paced back and forth. They didn't appreciate the tense waiting. Perhaps Keiichi and Belldandy weren't ready. Maybe they didn't like how the final product turned out. What if they were inside, only thinking about calling the whole thing off?  
  
"I'm sorry!" Sora cried once Chihiro shot her a look for making everyone else overly anxious, "I've never been this nervous before!"  
  
"Well, keep it to yourself, if you please," Chihiro replied, "It does no good for your club!"  
  
"But they should've been out here twenty minutes ago! There must be a problem."  
  
"Alright, alright," the former club leader said, "I'll go check, okay?"  
---  
"I am not forbidding her to race. I simply think it is very unwise, in her present condition, to put her body under such stressful conditions."  
  
"Well, I suppose so--"  
  
"Keiichi! Are you going to stand up for me or what?"  
  
"I'm sorry!"  
  
Belldandy, standing in front of a mirror while preparing herself, persisted, "I've been through worse."  
  
"Yes, you have, but--" the Assistant said before being cut off.  
  
"And please don't talk about me as if I'm not in the room."  
  
The Assistant with a stern look placed her hands on her hips, "From where did you pick up this attitude of yours? It is so unbecoming of you!"  
  
Keiichi had remained silent, looking back and forth between the two, until that moment, "Look, perhaps we should--"  
  
"It is NOT!" Belldandy shouted. Her voice shook the walls of the clubhouse and kept both Keiichi and the Assistant from responding in kind. "I'm sorry," she said, her tone returning to the usual calm, inviting demeanor, "I am not accustomed to having my judgement questioned in this manner."  
  
"If I may say so, your judgement is clouded by your emotions," the Assistant said firmly.  
  
"And I am so tired of hearing that! Why is it so dangerous to aspire to be human?"  
  
"I would hardly call it an aspiration."  
  
"Well, you are wrong."  
  
"And humans don't possess the knowledge of the Heavens," the Assistant added, "You do. It is a gift that is earned at great sacrifice."  
  
Belldandy walked up to the Assistant, trying to stare her down. She looked into her eyes, saying, "I don't accept that."  
  
"It is not for you to accept. Humanity is not a trait for goddesses to wield, and your mistakes could be harmful to others and yourself. Even fatal."  
  
She remained silent, unable right away to respond to such a remark. When she could, however, she stood beside Keiichi and held him. "If I die," she said, "At least I would have done so serving the one I love."  
  
Keiichi looked at her with a sudden feeling of fondness, "Belldandy."  
  
The door creaked open and the afternoon sun shone in, creating a silhouette in the shape of Chihiro, who stood in the doorway.  
  
"I'm sorry," she said, "Am I interrupting anything."  
  
"No, not at all!" Belldandy said cheerfully, jumping on the opportunity to break the conversation.  
  
"Well, they're all waiting for you. And we DO have a race day after tomorrow, so--"  
  
"Yes, of course," Keiichi replied, "We were just going over some things."  
  
"Alright," Chihiro nodded, then looking in another direction, "I'm sorry, we haven't met, have we?"  
  
The Assistant picked her head up, "No. No, we haven't."  
  
"Where's my manners? I'm Chihiro, and you are--?"  
  
She looked cautiously at Belldandy and Keiichi before trying to answer. "W-well," she stuttered, "I'm--"  
  
"--One of Belldandy's old friends," Keiichi said.  
  
"No, she's not."  
  
"Belldandy!"  
  
"I'm sorry, Keiichi, but she's not. Chihiro?" Belldandy said, beckoning Chihiro with a hand gesture to follow her out.  
  
"Yeah, of course," she replied with bewilderment in her fading voice, "Hey, did you cut your hair?"  
  
The Assistant watch them both go out the door, leaving her with Keiichi, who was picking up his gear on the way out.  
  
"This could be on your hands, Keiichi," she said softly, "You have to help decide what's best for her. After all, you have more experience about being human."  
  
Keiichi took one last look before heading out, "Perhaps. But I think she's doing pretty well on her own."  
  
She followed him only to stand in the doorway and watch the two of them seat themselves in the vehicle in front of the clubhouse. Belldandy smiled at all of them before settling herself down in the rear seat, as Keiichi was being fed some last-minute pointers by fellow club members.  
  
"We'll see, Keiichi," the Assistant mumbled to herself.  
---  
Even though it was a test run, the sound of the engine could not drown out those who were cheering for the club's two brightest racers, now giving it their all for the most important race on the calendar. Everyone in sight were jubilant, save for one man, the last spotter positioned at the finish line. He held his stopwatch firmly in his hand, paying no attention to the distraction at the nearby start line. The time on his device was the most important; it was determined that the official course could easily be run with a time of five minutes. If Keiichi and Belldandy were somehow unable to complete the test course under four-fifteen, they would not stand a chance against the rival clubs on race day.  
  
For Keiichi, it was business as usual. Another practice for another race. It was more difficult than most, sure, but he had been here before, and it was always his way to put great confidence in those around him: his fellow club members responsible for building the machine, Chihiro and Belldandy's sisters, who were there for moral support, and, most of all, Belldandy. He had no doubts in Belldandy's ability to co-pilot the vehicle through the course. Before Keiichi lowered the visor on his helmet, he shot a look of determination and confidence at Belldandy.  
  
She saw right through him. Not on purpose, of course. The sound of the engine drowned out all of her senses. The sight of Keiichi and the sound of cheering from everyone on the side bypassed her completely. It was the engine. Or the beating of her heart or the breath of trepidation from her lips or the weight of the expectations placed upon her. Belldandy wasn't sure, but her knees trembled nonetheless and a blank stare wore across her face as she settled into position.  
  
"Start!"  
  
In a flash, the vehicle and its two occupants took off in a hurry, with the noise of the eager participants fading in the distance. Keiichi blinked during the initial moments while picking up speed on the first straightaway. His judgement told him to be prudent with the acceleration; the course made it difficult from the start with the first sharp turn and a narrow opening through which to turn. Following this, a wide left and a right with an incline awaited. Keiichi took a deep breath. All he had to do was trust himself and Belldandy.  
---  
"Wow! Look at her go!" Skuld cried as she peered through a pair of binoculars. When the clubhouse crowd, with their unassisted sight, could not see them in the distance, they resorted to some very nervous clockwatching. Yet, Skuld remained energetic and boisterous, marveling at both the custom machine and its co-pilot, her sister. "Ooh, watch out!"  
  
"What're you so bubbly about?" Urd asked her younger sister.  
  
"I'm just paying attention to Belldandy. She's doing pretty well," she replied.  
  
"Yeah, well, she shouldn't be out there to begin with," Urd mumbled.  
  
Skuld put down her binoculars when the vehicle was out of sight and asked, "What's your problem?"  
  
"My problem? Aren't you with me on...this?"  
  
She thought about it for a second, and said simply, "I dunno."  
  
"What do you mean, you don't know?"  
  
"Well...look at her, you dummy! Isn't she happy? And if she's happy, I guess I'm happy. And I'm right here in case Keiichi tries to take advantage of her as usual, of course."  
  
"That's hardly the point. She's being unreasonable!"  
  
Skuld rolled her eyes, "Oh, like that's not someone else I know!"  
  
The elder sister flinched and bit her lip. "Skuld, dear..." she began to say.  
  
"And why are you so serious lately? You need to take it easy."  
  
"I'm just worried, that's all."  
  
"Well, don't be! It's not like you were before! Just leave it to me, I'll take care of her!"  
Chihiro checked her watch. They had to be halfway through the course at this point, or else they would rather not show up in two days time. But she was confident that Keiichi and Belldandy would have a good first practice.  
  
She tiptoed over to her guest, the third that was in the room before she popped in.  
  
"So," she started, "How do you know Bell?"  
  
The Assistant turned her head suddenly, not expecting to have to make conversation while she was wrapped up in intense brooding. "What?" she asked blankly.  
  
"You know Belldandy from somewhere?"  
  
"Yes. From work."  
  
"Oh, really? What work did you do previously?"  
  
The Assistant searched her own thoughts, looking for an answer. "Uh, well," she stuttered, "I don't know how to say it in your language."  
  
"No kidding, could've fooled me," Chihiro joked, "You seem to speak pretty well!"  
  
She leaned forward, "What are you trying to say about me?"  
  
Startled by the Assistant, Chihiro put up her palms and slowly backed away, chuckling nervously.  
"Base," the radio cackled, "Come in, please."  
  
"Yes, spotter, what's your status?" Sora asked.  
  
"I am not seeing them at turn sixteen. They have not passed me yet."  
  
"What's wrong?" said Chihiro, now walking over to Sora.  
  
"I don't know, he says that they didn't reach the checkpoint yet."  
---  
A group of five raced to Belldandy and Keiichi's last known position on the course, about half a kilometer from the clubhouse. First in sight was the vehicle, which had knocked over a few traffic cones that made up the course boundary. Skuld was the first to point to the two drivers, just starting to pick themselves up from behind the machine.  
  
Slowly taking off his helmet, a disoriented Keiichi looked about him, and saw his friends quickly approach them. He lifted a hand in search of a hand up as they all passed him by.  
  
"Sister! Are you all right?" Skuld questioned as Keiichi fell back onto the ground.  
  
Belldandy lifted the visor on her helmet, "Unh...I'll be alright."  
  
"What happened?" asked both Chihiro and Urd, a question visibly on the mind of the Assistant as well.  
  
Keiichi leaned up against the vehicle, which had suffered very minor damage at first glance. "Just an unfortunate turn of events," he replied, "I wasn't careful eno--"  
  
"Keiichi, please," Belldandy retorted, hanging her head, "It was my fault. I caused the spinout."  
---  
Sora and Chihiro looked over the machine back in the garage. There was no damage of consequence that couldn't be fixed right away in time for another practice run.  
  
"They really went full blast with this machine."  
  
"Yeah, they might've set an amazing time on their first run if they didn't overshoot the turn."  
  
"Are they alright?" Sora asked the Assistant when she walked in the doorway.  
  
"Belldandy will be just fine," she replied, "Just a couple of scrapes after hitting the road, but otherwise everything's alright."  
  
Chihiro asked, "Well...what about Keiichi?"  
  
The Assistant shifted her eyes, halfway dropping her jaw, saying, "I'm sorry, I didn't really pay too much attention to him."  
  
Looking at her peculiarly, Chihiro folded her arms and walked past her. Into the clubhouse she went, where Belldandy applied a wet cloth to clean an exposed area of skin on Keiichi's arm.  
  
"OW!" he shouted, "It hurts!"  
  
"I'm sorry!" Belldandy cried, recoiling, "Are you alright?"  
  
"Chihiro," Keiichi said upon her entrance, "How's the machine?"  
  
She waved him off, replying, "It'll be fine, as long as you two are ready to go again."  
  
The couple looked at each other, and just as Keiichi was eager to say that he could be out there in a heartbeat, he pulled back his response when the hesitance was clear on Belldandy's face. "Just...give us a couple of minutes, alright?"  
  
After a moment, she nodded accordingly and left the room. The room remained silent as Belldandy stood up and moved two steps apart from Keiichi.  
  
"What's wrong?" he asked.  
  
Her back turned to him, Belldandy looked out the window and gave a soft laugh. "Th-this--this isn't the roller coaster, is it?" she replied.  
  
"No, it isn't," he said, holding his arm when approaching her.  
  
"I could've seriously hurt you back there."  
  
"This? Naw, it's nothing. That's what the gear is for."  
  
"Keiichi," Belldandy said, turning to face him, "Please tell me the truth this time. It was me. I signaled you to go too fast because I thought I could make the turn. But I hesitated. It was my fault."  
  
"Belldandy, it was just--"  
  
"Say it, Keiichi!" she snapped before gently pulling back, "I ruined the practice run, didn't I?"  
  
Keiichi paused to think over his words very carefully. He looked into her eyes, and saw them filled with guilt that he didn't think was warranted. "It's a practice run," he said firmly, "That's why we do it, so we get it right."  
  
She turned away again, stepping away again. Flinging her arms about, she wondered aloud, "I used to be able to make the calculations in my head. Turn this way, turn that way, when to turn, how much to turn...and when to just do nothing. It was all so precise, so easy. And it was fun to do it because it was so easy. And now..."  
  
Keiichi held her hands. They were shaking uncontrollably, and she hadn't noticed until he had gripped them.  
  
"Now I'm just gasping for air, trying to keep up. It's so...frightening!"  
  
Listening to Belldandy, he nodded understandably. He chose to lick his lips rather than bite his tongue, and suggested, "It's not too late. I could get another co-pilot if that's what you want. There're plenty of good--"  
  
"No."  
  
Keiichi looked up, "What?"  
  
"I wanna do it," she said, half-determined.  
  
"B-b-but I thought--" he stammered.  
  
"I'll be more careful this time. I'll pay more attention to the road. I won't do it again. I want to get it right, just please don't drop me!"  
  
With those words, she collapsed into Keiichi's arms. Why she thought she would need to beg, Keiichi would never know, because he had already made up his mind.  
---  
The sun was high in the air and just beginning to come back down. There was plenty of time to make up the lost ground from the initial, unexpected spinout that took some of the fight out of the club.  
  
Keiichi settled back down into the vehicle rolled out for the second time that day. This time, the fanfare was somewhat subdued, though still confident and optimistic. He looked at his co-pilot, still shaking but determined to keep at it. This time, it was more about being deserving of the trust Keiichi put in her than it was finishing the course in good time.  
  
One nodded, followed by the other. They had to finish the course. Not just that they were counting on each other, but that the whole club was counting on them.  
  
As was the first time, the spotter at the end of the track adjacent to the start of the track kept a steady hand in possession of the stopwatch. He waited only for the word from Chihiro.  
  
"Start!"  
  
Off they went, and when they did, the cheering rose up again, as jubilant as the first time, if only to keep Keiichi and Belldandy in high spirits during those first moments when they were still in sight.  
  
"So, c'mon," Chihiro said minutes after the fanfare died down, "What is it that you and Belldandy used to do?"  
  
The words rung in the Assistant's ears. "'Used to'?" she thought to herself. She had to give a kind reply, and so it was, "We, uh, help people. People in need."  
  
"Oh!" Chihiro said, "Well, that certainly explains a lot about Belldandy."  
  
"Of course," the Assistant replied proudly.  
  
"People in need...like the poor, the homeless?"  
  
She nodded, "Yeah. People like that. And others, as well. Those who are deserving, I should say."  
  
"Really. Well, that's a very noble cause."  
  
"Nothing more worthy."  
  
"I see, I see. So, anyways," Chihiro said again, "What brings you into town to see Belldandy for?"  
  
The Assistant looked up, and then at Chihiro. She paused for a moment, and said, "I came to bring Belldandy back."  
  
Her jaw dropped and she let out a gasp. "Y-you're here to bring back...really?"  
  
"Yes," she said firmly, "What's wrong with that?"  
  
"Well, nothing, I suppose," Chihiro said, searching for words, "I mean, it's just so sudden!"  
  
"That's my plan," the Assistant said, right before stepping away.  
  
She was still processing the news in her mind. Belldandy leaving? What a strange thought! Chihiro pondered it some more, not watching the time as closely as the rest of the club. If she had, she would have been as slightly distraught as the others.  
  
An oblivious Chihiro waited at the finish line to greet the two contenders on their first complete practice run. Just as quickly as Belldandy and Keiichi pulled into sight, the two of them pulled the brakes just as soon as they crossed the line. Keiichi, darting upwards from his seat, hung his head. Belldandy was looking for words, but remained speechless. Chihiro was met by Skuld and Urd, but the three of them wondered what was the matter.  
  
The spotter examined the time on his stopwatch. "Five twenty-seven," he said.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED... 


	9. Crawling In The Dark

Only Human  
  
An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic  
  
By Roehl Sybing (indef@infinitedeferral.com)  
  
Chapter Nine: Crawling In The Dark  
  
Belldandy sunk deep into her own self, recollecting her memory of the past two days. First, she fixated on the concept that she lost count of how many times she and Keiichi had run the test course. Until recently, she had never lost count of anything in her life. Her memory and her knowledge was always crystal clear. Now every image, sound and sensation blended together with every other image, sound and sensation. She felt confused for a good deal of the last two days. Looking back, she found it was no longer easy to search herself and determine the right words to say or the right things to do in response to the world about her.  
  
---  
  
Her heart beat furiously, unable to settle down into a calmer, slower rhythm after those last two turns. Even though she, on four occasions, signaled for Keiichi to decelerate to a speed somewhat below what was required to finish the course with a respectful time, and that she had at least three dozen time trials before this one to memorize the turns and become accustomed to them. As they raced for the finish line on the final straightaway, Belldandy stole a glance at Keiichi. His helmet concealed most of his face, but the look on his eyes was one of both fatigue and frustration. Of course, in between time trials he would never tell her what he was obviously thinking. On this, he was too tentative, too...cowardly to give her an honest--  
  
No. She could never think that. After all, it was her fault. She was hindering their performance, thus letting everyone down. Now on top of everything she had pressure to deal with, and as it crept past midday it was killing her.  
  
The machine slowed to a stop past the finish line, and the stopwatch read four minutes and forty-one seconds. It was a marked improvement over their first try, but Keiichi and Belldandy had been consistently meeting that time for the past couple of hours. Their progress since has been more or less stagnant.  
  
If there was any vocal displeasure among the club members, Belldandy did her best to shut them out. Slowly, it was getting to her, and she wanted so much to be as polite and respectful as possible. She smiled gently as she helped Keiichi roll the machine back to the start line to get it refueled and going again. The incessant buzzing in her ear...  
  
"Stop! Just stop!" she cried out.  
  
Belldandy had vented her unforseen frustration on Sora, who had thought she was being helpful by giving some pointers in between time trials. After a while, her voice meshed in with all the others, because Belldandy just could not stand to hear any of it anymore. As always - and, to her, it was beginning to feel a lot like habit - she caught herself just a moment too late.  
  
Everyone around her stood silent. Even Keiichi was motionless. She put a hand on her mouth, searching for the appropriate words for an apology to right the wrong.  
  
"Yes, ma'am," Sora said before Belldandy could get the opportunity, "Sorry, ma'am."  
  
Before her voice could crack any further, Sora tiptoed away from the two of them as quickly as she could.  
  
"Sora, wait! I--" said Belldandy as her voice trailed off once Sora darted inside the clubhouse.  
  
This was new to her, the looks that she drew from everyone just then. Of course, she was always conscious that just her very presence often shifted focus on her, but this time it was different. She could not make out what was behind the faces. Some of it was shock. Just a tiny bit of it was scorn. The Assistant, behind all of them but in Belldandy's view, stood triumphant and couldn't help from showing just enough to be noticeable.  
  
---  
  
Belldandy sequestered herself to a corner of the clubhouse, away from the rest of the members that night. No doubt they were all dejected, considering their prospects on race day.  
  
She spent an inordinate amount of time after the final trials collecting herself and contemplating what had transpired. Even when her sisters walked in, she remained deep inside herself as Skuld pleaded with her.  
  
"You can't give up now! Think of how hard everyone's worked!"  
  
Belldandy bit her lip for a moment, and finally replied, "I'm not giving up. But it's over."  
  
"How can you say that?" she cried, "I know you can win. Everyone's pulling for you!"  
  
Out came a course map that Belldandy had pulled from her pocket. "Do you see this?" she said forcefully, all the while pointing to a sharp turn in the latter half of the track, "I cannot make that turn without telling Keiichi to slow down. I have had to run this course all day, and still I am petrified of this turn, and I don't know why! Tell me, Skuld, what should I do?"  
  
"I don't know, I don't know!" cried Skuld, right before turning in the other direction and running out of the room.  
  
For a moment, Belldandy and Urd avoided looking at each other. Their silence broke only at Belldandy's insistence, "I shouldn't have done that."  
  
"She's just disappointed," Urd replied.  
  
The younger sister choked on a tear, "She's not the only one."  
  
"Oh, man," Urd said to herself when Belldandy started breaking down. She sat down beside her to try and comfort her as she cried. "There, now," she said, "It's usually me that has to do the apologizing!"  
  
"I-I'm sorry, U-Urd," Belldandy stuttered in between tears, "It's just been so difficult these last few days."  
  
"C'mon, you don't have to prove anything with us," Urd pleaded, "Why do you go on like this? You know what you have to do."  
  
"Please, don't," she said softly, lowering her head on her elder sister's shoulder, "I don't want to argue right now."  
  
"Alright."  
  
So she gently comforted Belldandy to stop her from crying any longer, as if that was what big sisters should do in order to tire out their younger siblings. This was a change for Urd as well; for as long as she could remember, she was never the more mature between the two of them. And perhaps she didn't seem to mind it at all.  
  
"May I come in?"  
  
"Get out," Urd said sharply.  
  
"Come now," the Assistant said, ultimately walking into the room, "Eventually, I am going to have to tell her of my decision."  
  
The elder goddess shot up, demanding, "How can you be so cruel? Don't you notice that she's in pain right now?"  
  
"You forget yourself, Goddess SECOND Class Urd. For your sake, please leave us now."  
  
She looked at the Assistant with contempt, but there was nothing Urd could do but follow her command. On her way out, she looked at Belldandy, as if to pity her. Belldandy considered the expression on her sister's face, and then lowered her head.  
  
"What do you want?" she asked, not with defiance, but a sense of helplessness in her voice.  
  
The Assistant had her hands on her hips, almost feeling victorious. "I've decided," she said, "That I really can't force you to undergo the reversal."  
  
Belldandy gasped. It seemed too good to be true.  
  
"You're absolutely right, Belldandy. It doesn't get in the way of your current duty to Keiichi. Since you are fulfilling the current contract, there's nothing left to discuss on the matter."  
  
The Assistant was most gracious, Belldandy thought. "Thank you," she said, "Your judgement is quite accomodating."  
  
"However," she stipulated, "I've come to a conclusion about Urd and Skuld."  
  
Belldandy froze, "What?"  
  
"I fear that they may be influenced by what you are telling them about your condition."  
  
"'Influenced'?" she said, nearly horrified, "My condition!?"  
  
"Now, don't deny it, Belldandy, humanity is dangerous for any goddess to handle," the Assistant said in a calming but superficial voice, "I am surprised and relieved that you have been able to make good on this terrible ordeal."  
  
"Assistant, I don't believe you understand--"  
  
"No, Belldandy, I understand it completely. That is why I have decided to recall Goddesses Urd and Skuld so that they may fulfill other duties. We cannot risk further incidents like this one, for fear that it could lead to events more dangerous or more harmful."  
  
Belldandy stood up and walked around, thinking about what was just said. When it was all processed, she once again boiled over in anger, shouting, "How dare you! How dare you to think you can take my sisters away from me!"  
  
By then, they stood toe to toe, trying to stare down each other. The Assistant, needless to say, stood her ground, "You're doing it all by yourself, Goddess First Class Belldandy. You are making your stubborness a terrible example to all the other goddesses. You can end this now, of course, but if you don't, the order will go into effect in ninety-six hours."  
  
Out of frustration, she flung her arms into the air and walked about the room, but when she calmed down she conceded with a hurried voice, "Alright, I understand where you're coming from, but you can't recall my sisters! It's just been a difficult week, that's all, dealing with the trauma, adjusting to this new experience, the race tomorrow--"  
  
"You will fail in tomorrow's race," the Assistant said coldly.  
  
Belldandy held her breath. "What?"  
  
"Your status as a goddess gave you great power. In time, you could have done all that was yours to achieve," she said, now turning compliment to insult, "Now, you can't even help yourself."  
  
Perhaps those words did it for Belldandy. She was fed up. Here, right in front of her, was this arbitrary force whose sole purpose was to come down to Earth and make her miserable so as to convince her to become what she was again. Against such an underhanded tactic, Belldandy was powerless. But she stood her ground.  
  
"You won't sound so proud when I win that race tomorrow afternoon."  
  
"Not a chance."  
  
"Do you think so? I'll show you, I won't need any powers to cross that line first," she said resolutely.  
  
"We're just going to have to--where are you going?"  
  
Belldandy had stormed off before the Assistant could finish her sentence. She walked hurriedly among and past, largely unnoticed, those drinking the night away inside the clubhouse. Once outside, she hid in the nighttime shadow of the building, where she could let down the expression of courage on her face and give way to panicked helplessness.  
  
"What am I going to do now?" she asked herself.  
  
---  
  
"You seem to be taking it well," Chihiro said to Keiichi.  
  
Sitting down at the table as the last of his fellow members began to leave one by one that night, Keiichi shrugged in reply, "I've lost before."  
  
"Sure you have," she said, rolling her eyes, "No, it's because this race isn't on your mind. What's going on?"  
  
He shook his head innocently, saying, "Nothing, really, it's just been a rough week, and--"  
  
Chihiro hit him lightly on the head. "I wasn't asking you seriously! You're the leader of this club, I expect you to set an example!"  
  
"You're right. I'm sorry," Keiichi replied.  
  
"Now, I know you're doing your best. But it's Belldandy I'm worried about. She's scared stiff, and I don't know why. But I figure you do."  
  
"Heh. What gave it away?"  
  
"It's my antennae. Female intuition," she said, as she grabbed her keys, "Get her straightened out, alright? I still want to win tomorrow."  
  
"Will do. Thanks, Chihiro. Where is she, by the way?"  
  
"Don't you know? She was in the storage room all this time," Chihiro said on her way out, "See you tomorrow!"  
  
"Hmm."  
  
Keiichi finally got up from the table and walked into the storage room. He had seen both Skuld and Urd leave by themselves, with the Assistant following them home shortly after that, but he had not talked to them or Belldandy after the trial runs. All that he understood is that she wanted to be alone. But when he had a good look around the room, no one was inside. She couldn't have gone with them, and she couldn't have walked home by herself. When it dawned on him that her disappearance - again - may have been deliberate, Keiichi darted out of the clubhouse for a look around the immediate campus grounds.  
  
---  
  
"Belldandy!" he called out, "I'm getting ready to leave!"  
  
No one responded in return. The street lamps on campus stretched into the outer vicinity from the view of the clubhouse, but not one thing moved, and not one person was in sight.  
  
Keiichi joked about it to himself, that he might have to get used to this. But before Keiichi was able to contemplate what was quickly becoming habit, a familiar noise sounded in the distance.  
  
"AIIIIIEEEEE" accompanied the roar of what Keiichi quickly recognized was the engine of his motorcycle.  
  
It wasn't running terribly fast, just enough to keep itself from tipping over with both of Belldandy's feet off of the ground. The vehicle and its driver spun around in circles in front of Keiichi. It turned all angles as she took control of the motorcycle and lost control and gained it back and lost it again. As it was slow moving, Belldandy was hardly a danger to Keiichi. But when she drifted too close to him, he backtracked out of safety, only to trip on an unforseen object in the dark shadow of the clubhouse. After getting back on his feet, he found the sidecar that Belldandy had detached, with the help of a few tools that she had hurriedly taken from the clubhouse.  
  
Not a crash, but a loud thud shook the ground and had Keiichi running to where Belldandy had suddenly stopped. The motorcycle on its side was largely undamaged, but its rider was on her hands and knees, obviously disoriented from the experience.  
  
"Belldandy!" he cried, "Are you alright?"  
  
She lazily lifted her helmet, saying in between breaths, "H-Hi, Keiichi."  
  
---  
  
Back inside where the first aid kit was stored, Keiichi tended to Belldandy and the scrapes she had suffered from tumbling to the ground. Eventually, they got around to recounting all the incidents in the past week in which she needed aid.  
  
"I've noticed," she said, "That we're so fragile."  
  
"Who's that?" replied Keiichi, applying medicine onto a rather nasty cut.  
  
"Humans," she said, "It's amazing how delicate we are.  
  
He looked up at her for a moment, mentally double-checking her choice of words. Keiichi focused again on his handiwork when carelessness caused Belldandy to flinch in pain.  
  
"I'm sorry," he said, "But what were you doing out there anyways?"  
  
"I was trying to--" said Belldandy weakly, trailing off.  
  
"What was that?"  
  
"--scare myself. I was trying to scare myself."  
  
Keiichi shook his head, "I don't understand. Why?"  
  
Belldandy stood up prematurely, walked around for a while, and explained, " I thought that I should frighten myself with something I needed to do. The roller coaster, Keiichi! If I could just conquer that fear, then I could do anything."  
  
"Bell, if it's about the race--"  
  
"It's more than just the race, Keiichi!" she cried, "Lately, I've come to realize, all my life, I've never been truly tested."  
  
"You don't really believe that, do you?"  
  
"I don't know what to believe, Keiichi. But everything I've ever accomplished has come so easy to me. And now comes a challenge that I couldn't handle from the start. I didn't know what to do at first, but I believe the only way was to overwhelm myself and sort it all out in my head."  
  
"Well, I don't know if I would--"  
  
"Keiichi," said a firm Belldandy, "If I can make that turn by myself, I can make that turn in tomorrow's race."  
  
The determination was there, he thought. For the first time, though, she truly didn't know what she was doing.  
  
"I don't think taking apart my bike will solve your problem," Keiichi said half-jokingly.  
  
Belldandy, on the other hand, remained as serious as before, saying, "I'm sorry about the motorcycle, Keiichi. It was a foolish idea."  
  
"Bell, these machines are very complex. Before you do anything on a motorcycle, you have to learn how to ride it!"  
  
She listened to Keiichi and nodded her head, all the while looking away, embarrassed and dejected.  
  
"And we have, let's see," he said, checking on his watch, "Twelve hours to get it right. We'd better get started."  
  
Belldandy lit up. It was a familiar sight to see her smile, but Keiichi hadn't seen the bright expression that was on her face in quite a while. She drew closer and wrapped her arms around her tightly.  
  
"Oh, Keiichi!" she said, "Thank you!"  
  
"Yeah," he replied as her grip on him was quite firm and secure, "So, let's get started. Belldandy? Belldandy?"  
  
---  
  
Having Keiichi agree to it was the easy part. For six hours late into the night, an intense crash course took place in which Belldandy had to learn the basics of the motorcycle. Early on, the determination in Belldandy faded at times, as the vehicle tipped over on its side repeatedly while she processed all of the advice given to her by Keiichi.  
  
"I can't do it," she said one time.  
  
"Don't say that!" he snapped, only trying to motivate her into action, "Just keep at it, you'll get the hang of it sooner or later!"  
  
Belldandy nodded, and got back on the motorcycle. "Thank you," she said before lowering the visor on her helmet.  
  
"No problem," a smiling Keiichi replied, "Uh, I mean, do it again!"  
  
They used the clubhouse around which Belldandy took laps. It took her a dozen trials before she could finish one circle without falling off. Once she did so, Keiichi told her to go in the other direction. And then back again. And then through the test track. And then all of it, only faster.  
  
Along the way Belldandy suffered even more scrapes and bruises, but she wouldn't tolerate any delay, and quickly bandaged herself with makeshift dressings, refusing any timely help from Keiichi and only insisting on more practice.  
  
Closer to sunrise, Belldandy had one go at the test track, but as she finished the run, she became careless on the brakes and didn't stop when she wanted to. The bike slowed gradually and then to a halt, but turned against Belldandy as she flipped over onto the ground while the vehicle spun itself into a spiral and died tipping sideways.  
  
"What happened?" Keiichi cried, hurrying over to fallen Belldandy, "Are you alright?"  
  
"I'm fine," she replied though she was clearly otherwise. Her rapid breathing was erratic and she twitched while leaning on her hand. "Let's do it again."  
  
"Belldandy, you've been practicing for four hours, it's time to take a break."  
  
"Just help me off the ground, please!" she insisted, "I can handle it, we can't stop now!"  
  
"Belldandy!"  
  
"Just help me, or leave me alone!"  
  
Keiichi didn't have much choice against Belldandy. He gave her a hand up and watched her limp to his motorcycle, quickly setting it upright again and taking off for another practice run.  
  
By then, Keiichi had good reason to be concerned, but he put a smile on his face over the fact that Belldandy, at this point, could take care of herself. She was a very quick study on the bike, and nothing was going to stop her from doing what she wanted with it. It was now up to her to fight her own battles.  
  
---  
  
Spots of dawn in the sky appeared over the horizon. Neither Keiichi nor Belldandy cared one bit for it, as one, then the other, yawned out of fatigue.  
  
"We should at least take a break before we do this," Keiichi said.  
  
"No," Belldandy insisted, "Just this one time. I know I can do it."  
  
"Alright."  
  
The engine on the two-passenger machine turned over. They put on their helmets and gave each other a look of confidence. Keiichi set his own watch and they took off from the start line of the test course. It was for the first time that he noticed that the speed of the vehicle was impressive, much faster than he calculated for the initial design. From the first turn, Belldandy kept eyes straight ahead, not for one moment signaling to slow down, and the machine performed wonderfully on the sharp curves. More familiar with the course now, he was all the more wiser this time around, speeding up when prudent and keeping off the accelerator when avoiding the spinout, but Belldandy handled the steering with the concentration she had needed to exercise for the race. There was little hesitance from her, save the tension she was enduring and showing from beneath the helmet's visor.  
  
Keiichi's hand hovered over the controls for the brake. Up ahead, where the straightaway turned a sharp right, a series of street lamps surrounding the turn had burned out and gone dark. With not nearly enough light to see where the turn took place, he was reluctant to go full speed ahead. But as he touched the controls, Belldandy promptly shook her head, insisting that he stay where he was. Now he was more nervous than she was. But the tires screeched against the pavement as Belldandy cut hard to make the turn and stay within bounds. Keiichi let out a sigh of relief, not believing that she had memorized the course so well. He would have no doubt in his mind afterwards.  
  
But then came the final turn. She had the most difficulty with this sharp left curve that took place on an intimidating decline. Keiichi looked at her briefly, and this was where she showed the least confidence. But that she showed in her eyes any at all was good enough for him. Her eyes widened, her jaw dropped and she made one final move to secure the machine against the turn.  
  
---  
  
The vehicle slowed gradually after crossing the finish line, but Keiichi, so tired after not having had a night's worth of sleep, yanked on the brakes. Rotating and stopping to a halt, the machine threw its two passengers sideways, landing Belldandy on top of Keiichi after they went for a tumble.  
  
"Ouch!" Keiichi said, "I'm sorry!"  
  
"Forget about that! How did we do?" Belldandy replied, looking down on him.  
  
"Oh, right!" he said, reaching for his watch. He looked at the time, and smiled faintly. "We're ready."  
  
Belldandy gasped. Her eyes filled with delight. "Keiichi!" she cried, "I knew we could do it!"  
  
Without a moment's notice, after grinning from ear to ear, she lowered her head and kissed him, making sure he knew how thankful she was.  
  
They both sat up, letting go of each other for just a moment. Belldandy was so happy. Happier still when, to her surprise, Keiichi returned the favor and kissed her again. They stayed like this for a longer time, and when they finally broke away, she placed her fingers on her lips, delightfully amused.  
  
"You've been the perfect gentleman for too long," she said.  
  
"I've learned that it's good to take chances," he replied.  
  
"I wonder who from," she said, almost playfully.  
  
But the moment had passed when, after locking their gaze at each other for a long time, Keiichi yawned again, and Belldandy had laughed nervously.  
  
"I am tired."  
  
"Me too. Come on. Change of clothes in the clubhouse."  
  
They helped each other up and, after pushing the machine back to the front of the clubhouse, returned inside to start a new day.  
  
---  
  
A change of outerwear and some washing up preceded a bit of breakfast with tea shortly after the sun was fully in the morning sky. In reality, breakfast had turned into a full meal, one that required a great deal of items from the refrigerator.  
  
"I'm so hungry!" Belldandy exclaimed, after a night of expending all of her energy on the test course. She reached for two plates at one time and politely but hurriedly ate as much as she could.  
  
"Slow down, you're going to upset your stomach!"  
  
"What?" she said, only after gulping down, "What does that feel like?"  
  
Keiichi laughed, "Keep that up, and you're going to find out."  
  
The door swung open, and the two of them turned their heads to find Chihiro enter the clubhouse. "Good morning!" she said to them.  
  
"Morning," they replied.  
  
"My, you two got here really early," she noted when she put her things down, "Must be really excited, despite the odds."  
  
"Well," Belldandy said, looking at Keiichi, "I wouldn't worry too much about today."  
  
"Oh, really?" she asked curiously.  
  
"I think so."  
  
Chihiro finally looked up, and when she did, she noticed something odd. The expressions on their faces looked very different from yesterday. Something in the way of confidence, but she wasn't quite sure.  
  
"Something happen between today and yesterday?" she said innocently.  
  
"Don't worry about it," Keiichi said, letting out a laugh, "I think we're going to do just fine."  
  
TO BE CONTINUED... 


	10. On A High

Only Human  
  
An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic  
  
By Roehl Sybing (indef@infinitedeferral.com)  
  
Chapter Ten: On A High  
  
The goddesses had arrived later that morning to go out with the rest of the group, and Sora had found Skuld moping around the boxes of supplies she had put out for transport to the race grounds, so she asked her for help in getting the rest out of storage. In her listless state, Skuld didn't seem to mind. Unluckily for Sora, though, Belldandy's sister was so spiritless that her lack of attention dropped a small carton on her foot.  
  
"Oh, I'm sorry!" Skuld cried.  
  
Falling to the ground, Sora held her foot in pain. "It's alright, I'm fine! I'll be a moment!"  
  
"Let me help--"  
  
"No no, that's the last of them, I think. Just make sure we have everything there."  
  
"Right," she said, reverting to her state of depression.  
  
Sora watched Skuld go through the checklist she gave her. "You're thinking about Belldandy, aren't you?" she asked when she stood up by herself again.  
  
Skuld recoiled, unable to produce a response.  
  
"You know her better than I do, isn't there something different about her lately?"  
  
Sure there was, Skuld thought. She just didn't know how to say it and how it got to be this way.  
  
"Sora!"  
  
They both looked up, and there was Belldandy. She rushed up to the two of them, as if it were the last chance to see each other today. "I'm so glad I found you," she said, catching her breath, "I wanted to apologize for yesterday."  
  
Sora blushed, "Oh! T-T-There's really no need."  
  
"No, I need to confess, I was very rude to you during practice. I was tired...frustrated...but there's no excuse for it. I hope you'll forgive me," a very contrite Belldandy said.  
  
"Well, yeah, of course, nothing to it!"  
  
Belldandy smiled in relief, but she was not finished. "And to you, Skuld. I shouldn't have shouted at you."  
  
"Sister..." Skuld replied softly.  
  
"I hope I can make it up to you eventually. Can you forgive me?"  
  
Without a second thought, Skuld leapt into Belldandy's arms. The younger sibling could never be happier, "I could never be angry at you, Sister!"  
  
Belldandy sighed to relieve herself of all the tension. It was killing her inside and it showed, up until the resolution. "Maybe tonight I'll fix up some dessert to celebrate, alright?"  
  
Skuld nodded, "Mm-hmm!"  
  
"Good. I have to go, I have a race to win. Wish me luck!" she exclaimed, rushing off to prepare.  
  
They both looked at each other, and Skuld let out a happy sigh, saying, "No, she hasn't changed at all."  
  
---  
  
The contingent from the Nekomi Motor Club was in full force. Everyone had a role at the competition site. Some were making final tune-ups to the vehicle. Others were among the spectators, promoting the club. Even those in the cheering section from the stands were important. Today was race day, and the club was always at its best when it was racing.  
  
Keiichi looked all around him; he loved this atmosphere. He was quite at home, even among opponents, all who, on this day, had a halfway-decent chance of winning it all. Today was going to be the most open race in the club's recent memory.  
  
"Ready to go?" she asked him.  
  
"Yeah, just about--Belldandy?"  
  
Keiichi turned his head. Besides her usual racer's gear, Belldandy was sporting a pair of sunglasses with a look on her face that revealed as little emotion as possible.  
  
"Yes? Oh, these! There's this pressure that's bearing down behind my eyes--what do you call it?"  
  
"A headache?" replied Keiichi.  
  
"Yes. A headache," said Belldandy nonchalantly, "I have a headache. And the sun was bothering my eyes, so I bought these from a vendor."  
  
"Bell, are you sure you want to race? You haven't slept for over twenty hours, that's why you're feeling this way."  
  
She leaned on Keiichi and sighed, as if to signal that she was thinking it over. Then she looked across the racegrounds. In the distance, there were Urd and Skuld, following the rest of the club members to their seats. She lifted her sunglasses to get a good look at them.  
  
"Yes," a resolute Belldandy said, "I want to race. And I want to win, too. C'mon, let's get going!"  
  
Keiichi nodded, and followed her to the race track. Then it occurred to him to ask. "Bell, how did you pay for those?"  
  
Belldandy stopped. Color filled her cheeks. Then she smiled innocently. "These?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"I, um...Itooksomemoneyfromyourwallet," she said hurriedly, right before planting a kiss on Keiichi. She walked on, giggling like a little girl.  
  
"Oh, right," he replied, while softly running his fingers across his cheek. "Hey, wait a minute! What do you mean you took my money?"  
  
---  
  
The race was on. One by one, each vehicle sped through the track, with each pair of racers in search of the fastest time, all the while dazzling and winning over the spectators. Each team had two runs through the course, but it seemed that no one would be saving their best for last. Nekomi was in the middle of the running order, so its team would be able to see a good number of performances before they were called to the starting line. Some runs were successful, while a few were not, but all of them were aggressive and fearless, and awed everyone in the Nekomi camp.  
  
That is, until it was their turn to race.  
  
---  
  
"--And don't screw up!" were the last and only words from Chihiro that rung in Belldandy's ears as she settled herself into the vehicle. The real thing had a different feel that all those practices didn't prepare her for. Of course, Belldandy lacked confidence in herself and in Keiichi during those test runs. But this time, the pressure was on, and everything was on the line. So time moved a little faster. The noise from all the spectators was a little louder. And the watchful gaze of the Assistant was a little more offensive.  
  
When she turned her head, though, Keiichi's smile brought her back down to reality. Belldandy had never needed anything from him before. Now, it was all she needed, and what she needed most of all. She was ready.  
  
The lights before them flashed, one by one, until green was shown, and the inseparable pair took off.  
  
---  
  
From a distance, the Assistant watched Belldandy speed away with Keiichi on the race vehicle heading into the course. All the sensations of the moment were mentally discarded; she didn't care much for the race at all, and the fact that Belldandy cared about it a great deal puzzled her. She was the best among all the other goddesses, and her accomplishments as Goddess First Class would have been boundless, and yet she chose to live her life with a human, the most ordinary one could ever meet, to her mind.  
  
The Assistant just could not grasp the logic, of this and her desire to be just as ordinary herself. The choices the Assistant made were far different than Belldandy's, and she was defiantly proud of the path she took. She had surrendered her license, renounced her name, burying it so deep into oblivion that, when she was reborn, she had forgotten what it was. In return, she had greater power that came with her new responsibilities. She enjoyed unconditional access to Yggdrasil's most sacred resources, and the ability to speak for the Almighty in the fiercest of disputes. In time, the Assistant was feared and respected.  
  
But after all this time, it was Belldandy who was loved. Everyone loved her, but oh, how the Assistant envied her! She could not and would not give up her power just to know what that would feel like, but she had spent the last few days, much less a great part of her life in which she had known Belldandy, wondering endlessly over why it was so desirable, and why it was the one thing she could never have.  
  
Everywhere the Assistant walked, people kept their distance. Since her arrival, she had not endeared herself to the people that knew Belldandy, especially after word had traveled that she was there to take her away. The Assistant hadn't noticed it until now, but when she looked at them, they had on their faces a terrible look of dread. They couldn't possibly understand her responsibilities, of course.  
  
But even Belldandy's sisters, whose support she had when they presented their dilemma to the Almighty, reversed in their eagerness to save Belldandy, so much so that they were now urging her on to a race victory. Now they were among the Nekomi faithful, joining the fanfare that awaited their drivers at the finish line.  
  
The very thought of it infuriated her. Skuld always stood by her elder sister, so her change of heart was understandable. But Urd knew better, at least in this inquiry. She was, after all, the one who requested her. The eldest sister was quite conflicted about it once the Assistant had come down to Earth, and when she had snapped at her the night before, it was clear that Urd no longer wanted any part of Belldandy's involuntary recall. But most importantly, it was also clear that the Assistant was all alone, and for the very first time she had taken notice of it.  
  
The Assistant folded her arms, watching from afar that to which she did not belong. She did not belong to the throngs of cheering spectators, or among the closest friends of the race's drivers. The Assistant just did not fit. She was only doing her duty, and she did it faithfully and with absolute loyalty. Yet, never before did her work bear so little reward. Either that, or the rewards of her responsibilities no longer seemed valuable.  
  
Belldandy and Keiichi's vehicle was in sight, making the final turn and crossing the finish line, slowing to a halt only when the whole of the machine was over the painted stripe. Then it echoed in the Assistant's ears of her firm prediction that the goddess would not finish the race in first.  
  
"Three forty-one!" cried one spectator, reading off the official clock.  
  
The Assistant turned around, and all the people not already standing rose to their feet as the leaderboard indicated the new time set by Nekomi. She hardly knew what to say after that.  
  
---  
  
Belldandy slowly got up off the vehicle, catching her breath and still unaware of the result. In fact, her first words were contrite. "I'm sorry, Keiichi," she said, "I guess I wasn't paying attention to those last few turns--"  
  
Keiichi, on the other hand, heard nothing that Belldandy had said. With very little sleep in the past two days, he was exhausted and his parts were sore, and he was jumping up and down as a child would.  
  
"We did it! We did it!" he said.  
  
She looked all around her, seeing the entire club engulf the two of them and their vehicle. She watched as volunteers posted their time on the giant leaderboard; only then did she believe the reaction from Keiichi and the others. Belldandy was ecstatic. On instinct, she let out all of her emotion in one loud scream. Animated by the earth-shattering time, she embraced Urd and Skuld, who were standing in the inner circle of the crowd around them.  
  
"Can you believe it?" she said, "This is incredible!"  
  
Despite everything, Belldandy's sisters were happy for her, and joined everyone in celebrating, long before the competition came to an end.  
  
---  
  
Not long after their first run, Keiichi and Belldandy found themselves in a open, public field of trees and grass that neighbored the racegrounds. They were told to stay near; the second run was a formality by now, but they were required to run it.  
  
The feeling of sitting against a tree and having Belldandy sitting beside him, leaning on his shoulder to rest, was unfamiliar to Keiichi, though he was quickly getting used to it.  
  
"It's nice like this."  
  
"Yes, it is."  
  
"So what do you think?" he asked.  
  
Replied Belldandy, "I think we're going to win."  
  
Keiichi laughed. "Well, yeah, of course. But I meant--" he said.  
  
She looked up at him as he trailed off in mid-sentence. "What is it?"  
  
"I mean...it's just that, after this, you'll go back, right?"  
  
"Back to what, being a goddess again? What for?"  
  
"W-Well," Keiichi stammered, "I would think that you would like your sisters to--"  
  
"My sisters!?" she cried, sitting upright, "Who told you about that?"  
  
"Belldandy..."  
  
"Because if it's the Assistant, I can tell you that I won't change for her! I mean it, Keiichi, I won't be bullied by that creature, I don't care who she dares to speak for!"  
  
Keiichi watched her spout off, letting it out until she could calm down.  
  
Belldandy bowed her head, looking only at her feet. "It's another strange feeling...pride," she said, "I can't help it, I'm sorry."  
  
He nodded, "I understand. But Urd, Skuld...you'll never see them again, will you?"  
  
"I suppose not, not if I remain human," she said, resting her head on his shoulder again, "Oh, Keiichi, I love being like this. I love being a goddess, too. My whole life has been about helping people. It's all I've ever known. But lately I've realized...maybe there's more to life than a goddess could face. There's so much I haven't done, that I couldn't do as a goddess."  
  
"That sounds so strange," Keiichi said.  
  
"I know it does," she said, "But it's true. What if you hadn't made that wish? I would've missed out on so many experiences. And they've all been wonderful, but I've never understood what they meant to you. I learned how to ride a motorcycle this week, Keiichi. The sense of achievement was incredible. I didn't use any magic or process the numbers in my mind to imitate the act. Only with your help, I did it all on my own. And it felt great."  
  
"I think I understand."  
  
"Yes," Belldandy said, placing a hand on his cheek, "Someday I'll make it up to you, for helping me to learn about humanity, putting up with me for all this time."  
  
"You're wrong. You're not a bother to me. Not now or ever," he said, smiling.  
  
"Don't say that," she said, "One day, you might not like the human I become."  
  
Keiichi scoffed, "Will you stay with me, no matter what happens?"  
  
She looked at him, saying sincerely, "Of course."  
  
"Then how can I ever resent you?"  
  
Belldandy smiled, "Thank you."  
  
She leaned in closer against his body, closing her eyes to rest for a while as Keiichi did the same. Their ears picked up a faint roar from the racegrounds.  
  
"What about Urd and Skuld, then?"  
  
"I'll talk to the Assistant after the race. I hope she'll be reasonable. I'll cancel my license if I have to, I won't need it anymore anyways."  
  
---  
  
"Cancel your license? But...why?"  
  
"You know why. Besides, what good is it for a goddess who has but only one wish to fulfill?"  
  
"Yes, but...why don't you simply do as the Assistant says?"  
  
"Oh, Urd," Belldandy said, playfully clicking her tongue, "You used to be so defiant, so troublesome. What happened?"  
  
Urd watched her sister wrap her arm around her, holding her close and making light of their dilemma.  
  
"C'mon, where's that annoying, irresponsible big sister I used to know and love?" she nagged.  
  
"Annoying?" Urd thought to herself.  
  
"In spite of everything," Belldandy said in a more serious tone, "You had this light about you. Where has it gone, Urd?"  
  
She turned away even as her sister tried to make eye contact. "I think," she replied, "I think I began to see a bit of myself in you."  
  
"Oh, well. We're sisters, what do you expect? Unless there's something you haven't told me," she joked casually.  
  
Urd laughed a little, then reversed herself. She broke from Belldandy and walked around. This is serious, of course!  
  
"I don't think I've been a good example for you lately."  
  
Belldandy scoffed, "What's that?"  
  
"I mean it. I'm supposed to be your sister, and as immature as I am, I'm not getting any younger."  
  
"Actually," Belldandy said, "You're not really getting much older, either..."  
  
"Belldandy!"  
  
"Urd," she said, looking up at her from mere inches away, "Do you think you're responsible for me?"  
  
The elder goddess bobbled her head and mumbled under her breath, searching for the right verbal response.  
  
"Urd!" she replied with delight, "That's so sweet to hear you say that! Of course, I've always known, but I don't think I've ever heard you admit it until now."  
  
Hearing this, Urd smiled as her sister placed her hands on her shoulders, looking eye to eye at her.  
  
"But you're wrong," Belldandy said bluntly.  
  
Urd's face quickly fell. "What do you mean?"  
  
"You have your own mind, and so do I. I've let you do as you please because that's who you are. I hope that you will do the same for me."  
  
"Ha!" Urd said, "And what about Skuld?"  
  
"Skuld? Well, I love her, but she's gonna need plenty of guidance from the both of us!"  
  
They both laughed, and it took the both of them a while to settle down, and only because it hurt inside to laugh so much. When one was able to talk, though, she did so.  
  
"Urd," Belldandy said, "You don't have to take care of me. You don't have to feel guilty or feel that it's your fault if I do anything wrong. You're my sister, and if I ever need help I know where to turn. But don't protect me."  
  
Urd searched the look on Belldandy's face for a moment or two, and found it to be sincere. She cracked a smile once again, right after letting out a great sigh.  
  
"Well, that's a relief!" said Urd, "I was beginning to worry for a while!"  
  
Belldandy grinned, "Good. Now. Only one left to worry about is...her."  
  
They both frowned. They had not seen the Assistant all day, although they were sure she went with the rest of the people from Nekomi. At last count, she was still determined to put Belldandy in her place.  
  
---  
  
Behind the stands, she paced back and forth in front of Belldandy. Her arms were folded together and the look on her face was as stern as ever. The Assistant would not make eye contact with her, even as she pleaded with her to reverse her decision.  
  
"You know, you look really nice with those human clothes," Belldandy said. It seemed like the only natural thing to say.  
  
"Quiet."  
  
"Sorry."  
  
The Assistant sighed. Looking at her, she was obviously so happy here on Earth. But it just wasn't that simple.  
  
"I can't accept a Goddess First Class to be compromised by humanity," the Assistant said.  
  
"You said it yourself, it does not interfere with my duties," replied Belldandy, "But I will accept expulsion if I have to."  
  
"Don't you understand? You are the best of us, and if you can leave at will, then--then...then every goddess in the system can abandon their responsibilities for their own sakes. And I can't allow that!"  
  
"I know. But I know I must follow my humanity, wherever it takes me. Whatever I become, just please don't take my sisters from me!" she pleaded.  
  
The Assistant shook her head. She examined Belldandy's look of desperation and felt a terrible sense of guilt.  
  
"I don't know. It's so difficult. Someone would need to take your place. A gap like this among the membership is just too large to ignore."  
  
"Well," Belldandy suggested, "You could become a goddess again."  
  
"What?" the Assistant said, scoffing at the idea.  
  
"I remember. You received a perfect grade in training. You worked so hard to earn your license."  
  
"Belldandy--"  
  
"You had a bigger heart than I did, perhaps. But you didn't think you could do enough as a mere goddess, and so you decided to work in direct contact with Yggdrasil."  
  
"It was the only choice I could make," the Assistant said.  
  
"Yes. But I hear the whispers. You have been so alone all this time. It must be painful to have no one as your equal," Belldandy said, walking up to her even as the Assistant turned her back, "But it doesn't have to be this way."  
  
"It does," she replied, "We all have our roles, we cannot change who we are."  
  
"I did," Belldandy said softly, "So can you."  
  
They stood silent like this for a moment, with one's back turned away from the other. The Assistant was a half step from giving way, but it was that half step that was the most difficult. The weight of the entire system was on her shoulders. And the thought of becoming a goddess again was enticing. Despite her most fiery efforts to bring down Belldandy, in her seemingly weakened state that was humanity, it was Belldandy who was turning her around. All she had to do was say it, and the recall of her sisters would be nullified.  
  
"Belldandy!"  
  
The two looking behind them, and it was Keiichi approaching them, his helmet on his head and hers in his hand.  
  
"What's wrong?"  
  
"C'mon, we have to make our second run," Keiichi said.  
  
"Don't worry, Keiichi," Belldandy said, "We're going to do fine."  
  
"You don't understand," he insisted, putting the helmet into her hands in a rush, "I don't know how it happened, but they've beaten the time on our first run!"  
  
TO BE CONTINUED. 


	11. Bad Day

Only Human  
  
An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic  
  
By Roehl Sybing (indef@infinitedeferral.com)  
  
Chapter Eleven: Bad Day  
  
On their first run, they had beaten the fastest time by over a minute. Now they were trailing by fourteen seconds.  
  
Belldandy, who had once been overwhelmed with fear, intimidation and despair, sometimes all at the same time, felt none of those emotions before her second and final run.  
  
Someone had the upper hand on her, like never before. Her advantage over everyone else was quietly yet quickly taken away from her. She was angry. Though Belldandy had no emotional attachment to any of the competitors in the field, deep down her hope was that whoever led the pack would not be within sight of her at the moment.  
  
Keiichi didn't pay any attention, though. He was working with his repair crew on some last-minute modifications to the vehicle, and simply making sure that they would be in top shape for the second run. The rush of adrenaline before an important race was familiar to him. Often times he would not know what to do with the intense feeling of anticipation and excitement. But today was race day, and the pressure fit Keiichi like comfortable shoes. His pace was a bit hurried and tensions were still running high, but he remained calm despite everything.  
  
A large, iron hammer dropped to the ground beside him, just as he relayed final instructions to his fellow club members. From the direction that it was thrown, a violent storm centered around Belldandy. And since she didn't know what to do with herself as of late, taking her frustrations out on a small but heavy object taken from a toolbox seemed like the right thing to do.  
  
"Belldandy--"  
  
"I did everything right, I don't understand what happened!"  
  
"Calm down, we have to get--"  
  
"And I don't know how, but one way or another I'm going to--!"  
  
"Belldandy!"  
  
Keiichi planted his hands on her arms, trying to get her to stop. She was still fuming, but Belldandy always held herself in place for him.  
  
"What do you want!?"  
  
Time stood still at that moment.  
  
"I'm sorry, Keiichi," Belldandy swiftly replied in her quietest voice, a stark turnaround from the temper she was just carrying. "Did you want something?" she asked quite calmly.  
  
"I--uh--um--" stammered Keiichi. "I was just about to say that we have to go now."  
  
She looked at him blankly, "Really?" Taking a look over his shoulder, she saw the vehicle all prepped and ready to go, flanked by most of the club membership. "Well, I guess it's time then!" she replied, genuinely all smiles.  
  
Belldandy took Keiichi by the hand on that note, but he wouldn't budge, as he reviewed in his mind what had just transpired.  
  
"Don't worry, Keiichi," she said in a matter-of-fact tone, "I wore myself out after I threw that hammer onto the ground."  
  
"And after--?"  
  
"Oh, that? I didn't know what to do with myself, so I just pretended angry. I don't know now, but it seemed like the thing to do."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"C'mon, we gotta get going!"  
  
---  
  
The crowd was at a fever pitch as Nekomi geared up for its final run through the course. The spectators were assured of a real treat, as the competition saved its best for last. With Keiichi and Belldandy piloting the vehicle, the club was a certain lock to win it all.  
  
Skuld knew better than that, and yet she still favored her elder sister. After twice getting in the way of the repair crew in between runs, she was relegated to watching from a distance. It didn't make any difference; she loved to watch Belldandy race. She loved to watch Belldandy do anything, for that matter. And whatever the circumstances, Skuld never discounted her sister for a moment. Belldandy was human, but, to Skuld, she was the brightest, most promising human on the racegrounds.  
  
"Aren't you going to watch?" she asked.  
  
Urd replied, "In a moment! I'm off to get the beer for everyone to celebrate!"  
  
Skuld looked at her sister in disgust, "How can you even think of missing the race?"  
  
"Well, we're going to win, aren't we?"  
  
The goddess walked away shrugging her shoulders, despite all the pouting her younger sister did behind her back. Urd figured that she should be watching in any case. A million things could go wrong and the race was hardly won at the moment. And, as she had begrudgingly shown over the past few days, she loved Belldandy more than anyone else that knew her. As a human, she was a whole new Belldandy, and yet quite the same underneath all of her irrepressible emotions and unchecked behavior. A curiosity to others, perhaps, but a cause of grave concern to Urd, who knew from past experience what it was like to be mortal, all vulnerable and imperfect. Still, her younger sister was right; Belldandy didn't need any protection. Whatever happens, she would deal with it. Among other things, she never lost her resolve.  
  
And since they were going to win anyways, Urd felt the urgent compulsion to break out the drinks.  
  
She walked in front of and right past the Assistant. And while trouble swirled in a halo around the mysterious, grim messenger, the Assistant was lost in her own little world, unconcerned with Belldandy's elder sister for the moment.  
  
The Assistant wasn't convinced. At least that was what she told herself. But she had to remind herself every few moments that the whole proposition of being part of the system was not about self-interest, but rather an infinite concern and compassion for others. And Belldandy walking around as a human being, trying to pretend to be one of them. It was bad enough that a careless wish kept her anchored to the Earth and to a simple, unremarkable mortal, but now she was exactly like them. It angered her so much, in fact, that she just had to persuade the Almighty to send her down to perform the inquiry.  
  
Now things weren't so clear. The Assistant had only been there for three days, but while she hadn't yet caught on, she understood that there was a certain...rustic appeal to being among humans. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, and until she understood it, she could maintain her opposition to Belldandy's defiance.  
  
In the meantime, though, the Assistant was quietly supporting her to win.  
  
---  
  
"I think, no matter what happens, you've all done very well," Keiichi said to all, "We've built a great machine and we've ran a great race. Party back at the clubhouse tonight!"  
  
The entire Nekomi delegation erupted in jubilation. To Keiichi, it felt good to get them going. Belldandy had done it so often that, even as leader, his only real responsibility over time was to just run the race.  
  
"Well, that was the hard part," he said to Belldandy as they walked to the vehicle.  
  
"I suppose so."  
  
"Well, you should. You used to always have something helpful to say."  
  
"Nah," Belldandy replied, shaking her head before donning her helmet, "Not anymore. I just want to ride."  
  
Keiichi lowered her down into her seat. She would not see him flash a smile of agreement and sport a nod of the head as he settled himself into the vehicle.  
  
---  
  
Slowly, they rolled the machine to the starting line, but long before that, they were already feeling the hopes and support of the entire club riding on their backs. But the pressure didn't come from them.  
  
Keiichi didn't know what had really transpired between Belldandy and the Assistant. To him, this was just another race to win, and he so loved to win. But to Belldandy, a great deal of pride, much more than in competitions past, was on the line, and a lot of that came from showing up another former goddess that thought very little of her recent decisions. She got a glimpse of the Assistant, who observed from afar. The expression on her face was a mystery. Finding out if Belldandy had convinced her would have to wait until after the race. All the better, she supposed. The second run would give her one more chance to prove herself worthy, without the benefit of being a goddess. Never before had she wanted to win so badly.  
  
"Start!"  
  
The couple took off, and by now, after a full day and a half of running through the same course on the same vehicle, the second run was nothing but a sure thing. Keiichi and Belldandy were exhausted, at times discouraged, and often in pain, either by physical fatigue or emotional distress. But they remained determined to finish what they had started, and finish on top.  
  
By the first few turns, Belldandy was grinning underneath her visor. The speed was up to Keiichi's discretion, but the turning was her responsibility. To her surprise, the curves were taken with nothing but instinct, and the vehicle responded to her in perfect form. For the first time as a human, she felt the same way as when she raced as a goddess with Keiichi. The calculations of piloting the turns and straightaways were second nature, and her reactions to the course, to the vehicle and to her partner were quick and smooth. With her mind off the the complications of racing, Belldandy could now live in the moment. The wind that whipped across her body, the grip of the handlebars at the palms of her hands, that feeling of exhilaration in the pit of her stomach, they all felt good. They were what riding under pressure used to be before her transition.  
  
"I'm going to win, Keiichi," she said underneath her helmet.  
  
When Belldandy felt like this, she could take risks, worthwhile risks that gave her an even better edge in this competition. She knew where the turns were and how sharp they were, and all of her fears were conquered. And when the giant curve more than halfway through the course was more than beaten, Belldandy already felt as if the win was hers. Now she was determined to make it a grand performance for everyone to remember.  
  
Much like everything else as of late, the experience was intense, but only one thing she did that day was more exciting, or more satisfying, than this. Belldandy was enjoying herself, and when her newfound humanity made such a feeling all the scarce, it became much more rewarding. Save for her beloved partner, she was doing it all by herself. No tricks, no magic, no special powers. Nothing more than raw resolve and acquired skill was needed to conquer the most complicated twists in the course.  
  
The last bit of adversity left for Belldandy to face lay not with the Assistant, or her sisters, or with anyone else. Her heart beat profusely, almost begging her to quit. Belldandy couldn't stop now. In her mind, to her estimation, she had already beaten the clock, and there was not much more to go. But Belldandy had to finish. The race was to be won by crossing the finish line. With four turns still left in the course, she couldn't just put all of the burden on Keiichi.  
  
Nonetheless, Belldandy was tired. On the last major straightaway, she tried to remember the order. Left, left, right, left...or was it right, right, left, right? The first one would be just over a small hill, just large enough to conceal what lay ahead. Then she blinked twice, and remembered an old trick. The visor on Keiichi's helmet was dark, but not dark enough to conceal his eyes. They were looking away from her, a sign that he anticipated a turn to the left.  
  
But a turn to the right it was, when a blink of the eyes shifted his gaze in Belldandy's direction.  
  
She gasped out loud, even though it would not be heard above the sound of the engine. She had performed the turn with ease. The rest of the order, fitting a minimal pattern that Belldandy had memorized, fell into place with great simplicity.  
  
If she could wipe the sweat from her brow, she would. The worst of it was over. Belldandy was ready to pounce on the victory. A final burst of speed from her partner as they rocketed over the finish line, and the race was complete.  
  
---  
  
When it was over, Belldandy had collapsed into her seat. The last of her strength was reserved simply for breathing and whatever movements were necessary for her not to fall into unconsciousness. She was happy, but she was tired. Keiichi's voice echoed in her ears.  
  
"Come on, now."  
  
"A moment, Keiichi."  
  
"Alright," he said somberly, "It was a good race, though."  
  
"Yeah, it was."  
  
Then she held her breath.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
Keiichi turned around, "Huh?"  
  
"You said, 'It was a good race, though.' What do you mean?"  
  
He was at a loss for words. He thought that it could not have been more obvious, so obvious that he felt he didn't need to break it to Belldandy until now.  
  
"I'm sorry, Bell," Keiichi said, "We didn't cut it."  
  
He must've been mistaken, Belldandy thought. Then she looked at the clock above the leaderboard. It read a peculiar sight. She knew it must have been wrong or someone had failed to properly keep time, because it was more than a few seconds slower than their first run.  
  
---  
  
The clubhouse was open. The refreshments were laid out. The karaoke machine was on. Second place was such an unfamiliar position for the Nekomi Motor Club that they didn't know what to do in case they hadn't won. And so the victory party went on as scheduled.  
  
"It's time to party!" was the cheer, followed by fanfare and plenty of drinking to go around. The whole place was lit up for their usual celebratory ritual, both for the new members among the university students that had attended the race, and all the old members looking for an excuse to party. Almost everyone was in attendance; Sora was behind the microphone, Chihiro had drawn herself into a drinking match with two other members, while Urd was just plain getting drunk.  
  
One certain club member, on the other hand, made herself scarce shortly after the festivities had begun.  
  
---  
  
"Belldandy?" Keiichi said, sitting next to her on the bench outside the clubhouse.  
  
She looked at him blankly. "I'm sorry," Belldandy said, "I'm not really in the mood for a party."  
  
"Don't be silly, everyone's in there. They're all waiting for you."  
  
"Hmph, what could they possibly want for me after today?"  
  
"Belldandy, please don't look like that--Belldandy! Where are you going?"  
  
"I just need to be alone for awhile, that's all."  
  
"But it's dark and cold out here," he said, making her stop, "Say, why don't the two of us go home early, what do you think?"  
  
She walked around in circles, going over in her head what might have gone wrong.  
  
"I had that race nailed, Keiichi. That course was mine."  
  
"I know it was, Bell. It happens sometimes."  
  
"Not to me, it doesn't!" she retorted, as the fire in her eyes remained long after the race was over. Fortunately for Keiichi, the burning anger had left her, leaving only a sense of deep determination even after the battle had been lost.  
  
Belldandy bit her lip, and said softly, "I know I can still do it."  
  
It was then that Keiichi stood up to her, "Belldandy. It's time to go inside. There will be other races. Really!"  
  
She looked at his smiling face. She never doubted his sincerity, and despite any desire to do as she wanted, she could never refuse him. Belldandy nodded her head slightly, and followed him back into the clubhouse.  
  
---  
  
The door closed behind Belldandy, and for a brief moment she put away her frustration when the entire clubhouse lit up when it became known that she was in the room. Streamers and confetti filled the air, regardless of the result, simply because she and Keiichi were their best chance at victory, and no one would ever come close to their performances in any competition.  
  
Conciliatory words met Belldandy as they made their way across the room.  
  
"You'll do better next time!"  
  
"You did your best!"  
  
"Don't worry about it, it was a good race!"  
  
It irritated her. Not the people that said it, but that the result she put up on behalf of Keiichi and the club compelled her to hear what she didn't want to hear. Still, Belldandy feigned a smile. She was so deflated after such bitter disappointment that she did not feel at all well inside, causing her to sit down at one table.  
  
"Do you want something to drink?" Keiichi asked.  
  
Her smile was gone by the time of his question. Belldandy clutched her hair, and shook her head, "Thank you. I'll get something if I need it."  
  
"Alright," he replied, sitting down next to her. And while the music played on, they remained silent to each other, as one searched for the right words to say, and the other, by saying nothing and intending to say nothing at all, declined to be the least bit diplomatic. In the meantime, Keiichi was sizing up just how big the loss was to Belldandy.  
  
"Big Sister!" a voice called out from among the small crowd. Once she was seen, Skuld led Chihiro by the hand to Belldandy and Keiichi. Sure enough, Skuld felt just like her elder sister. "How can anyone party at a time like this?"  
  
"It's alright, Skuld. Let them," Belldandy replied tersely. Her eyes remained pointed to the ground.  
  
"So how are you doing?" Chihiro asked, "First loss is always the toughest, I figure."  
  
"Well, now I know how it feels."  
  
Keiichi spoke up, "I've been trying to tell her that she did her best back there."  
  
"Yes, I know," she snapped, "I just don't have to like it, that's all."  
  
The four of them remained in place. Seeing how it couldn't possibly be Belldandy who stepped over the line, the rest wondered who among them was the culprit with the ill-timed remark.  
  
"Why don't you come with me," Chihiro said to Skuld, "Let's go get you some dessert or something."  
  
Skuld resisted, "But what about Sis--"  
  
"Just follow me, kid."  
  
"Hey, I'm not a ki--!"  
  
"Skuld!"  
  
Belldandy, ready to fire, stopped herself in her tracks. Though she was quite agitated, a directive, reinforced over the last few days, repeated in the back of her mind. Don't snap at Skuld. Ever.  
  
"Please go with Chihiro for awhile," she said softly, "I'll find you later."  
  
The youngest of the four looked at Chihiro, then at Belldandy. She complied reluctantly as she was taken by the hand.  
  
"Oh, Keiichi," Chihiro said, "There are a couple of students up front that want to become members. Could you please make sure they're signed up?"  
  
Keiichi nodded, "Sure."  
  
Then looking to Belldandy, "You'll stay here?"  
  
"Mm-hmm."  
  
Left by herself, she took a cup of water that was within reach from where she sat. Belldandy coddled the drink for awhile. She was not angry. And she didn't have any tears. In her mind, she was going over her strategy during the race. She was not fast enough, and it wasn't even Keiichi's fault. Her turns had to be sharper, simply as that. Once then, she knew that she could duplicate and even improve on her initial run. If she were not so tired at this point, she would have done so with Keiichi's motorcycle.  
  
"May I?"  
  
Belldandy looked up, only to see the Assistant standing across the table from her.  
  
"Those are the clothes of an Earther," Belldandy said, examining her casual dress taken on to blend in with everyone else, "They don't suit you."  
  
"All the kindness in the universe, Belldandy. Is there none for me?" the Assistant asked, seating herself.  
  
"I'm sorry, I was trying my hand at humor. What could you possibly want?" she said curtly.  
  
The Assistant sighed. She said genuinely, "I don't want to fight."  
  
"Well, that's a relief."  
  
"I just wanted to say...you ran a very good race."  
  
Begrudgingly, Belldandy nodded her head, "Thank you."  
  
"But it's over."  
  
"Like my Keiichi said, there will be other races."  
  
"No, I mean, it's over. I have made my final recommendation to the Almighty. I didn't want to inform you until after you've won, but now..."  
  
She stopped in mid-sentence, as if the next word would take her over a precipice and into a very deep hole. She knew it was her job, but never before had she resented it as she did now. Belldandy was right, but the Assistant had an inquiry to finish.  
  
They looked at each other, one uncertain and uneasy about what was to be said by the other.  
  
"Please, just say it."  
  
The Assistant exhaled, reluctant to get it done with. "Very well," she said finally underneath the music, "Goddess First Class Belldandy, I am ordering you to undergo the reversal in three days. I must have your decision in two. Failure to comply will result in the unconditional cancellation of your license."  
  
Nothing that she hadn't heard already, Belldandy thought. She was quite willing to break with it all; perhaps less so at the moment because of the competition, but she remained quite adamant about what she wanted.  
  
"I thought you understood," Belldandy said.  
  
The Assistant leaned in closer to her. "Belldandy," she replied, "There's more."  
  
Belldandy looked up at her.  
  
"Whether you remain human or become a goddess again is up to you, but in seventy-two hours I am recalling your sisters in either event. This will be a permanent transfer."  
  
Her face fell again. Belldandy turned away, trying to piece it all together. It was too much to take in at once. She shook her head, and said with a taint of vengeance on her lips, "I'll fight you."  
  
"You can't," the Assistant replied blankly, "I speak for the Almighty. My authority is absolute. I admit, this has not been an easy case for me to decide, but this is the best solution for everyone. Your sisters' recalls are mandatory. I am giving you three days to put your affairs in order."  
  
The room was silent for both of them. Belldandy was devastated.  
  
"Of course, the only way you can ever return to the heavens and see them again...is if you end this and renounce your humanity."  
  
That, of course, became the last insult. Belldandy shot up like a dart, as the party music filled the clubhouse once again. "Not if I have anything to say about it," she said, walking past the Assistant and storming out of the clubhouse.  
  
---  
  
The outside air was a bit thinner, all of a sudden. Belldandy couldn't breathe. She was being forced to do that which she refused to do. One way or another, this was a punishment. She was absolutely sure that they would not let her remain as she was now. And in any case, she would lose her sisters in the process. When faced with circumstances such as these, it was difficult for Belldandy to be what she was taught to be. She had every right now to be irrational and emotional about her situation.  
  
Keiichi was too busy to talk at the moment. There was only other one thing in the world that could distract her and take her mind off of her troubles.  
  
---  
  
Keiichi had long since delegated the new membership duties to Sora. Now he was making sure that everyone was having a good time. He kept a sharp eye out, though. The Assistant, for one, and Urd, just to make sure she's not causing more than the usual amount of chaos. Chihiro had found Skuld some ice cream, so that was at least one less worry in the mix.  
  
This was a party, of course. Everyone was having a good time, and that was all that matters. It was a difficult field of competitors to contend with, Keiichi thought, and he couldn't win them all. Underestimating her reaction to the loss, he had hoped that the party would lift Belldandy's spirits.  
  
Where was Belldandy? He asked himself the question a few times as the sound of screeching tires came before a loud crash that shook even the walls of the clubhouse.  
  
---  
  
It was a simple enough mistake. She didn't intend it at all. Belldandy had turned too sharply. She wanted to prove it to herself that she was worthy, but more importantly, she just wanted to get one last twinge of excitement up her spine, seeing as how moments like these were, all of a sudden, running out. But she had turned too sharply, and only the markers and traffic cones on the test course remained, having had all of the safety barriers taken away by sunset.  
  
The motorcycle lay a bit of a distance from her. Much similar to the bike, Belldandy lay flat on the ground, arms spread out and her left foot moving back and forth, just so that she could be sure that she could move it at all. It was difficult for her to breathe. And it had become so cold all of a sudden.  
  
"So tired," Belldandy said, struggling mightily to cry for help as she inevitably drifted into unconsciousness.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED. 


	12. Don't Dream It's Over

Ah! My Goddess is created by Kosuke Fujishima. All of the characters contained within this fanfic are either creations of Kosuke Fujishima or independent incarnations based on his work. 

infiniteDeferral Productions presents

Only Human

An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic

By Roehl Sybing

Chapter Twelve: Don't Dream It's Over

Belldandy recalled the sequence of events over and over. Not the mistake of her own doing that caused her to be thrown off of Keiichi's motorcycle, but what had transpired quickly after she realized that she was in grave danger.

She was airborne for no more than a second or two, after which Belldandy hit the ground hard. Out of sheer inexperience, she flung her arms in front of herself to try and break her fall. When they eventually collapsed against her chest, she tumbled across the road, where one of her ankles made contact with an unseen metal object in the dark. When it was over, there were serious cuts and bruises all over her body, some more visible than others because of the spots of red they made on her clothing.

The number of conscious moments Belldandy had to examine the damage all around her was short, but if her blurred vision picked up on the shattered motorcycle from a distance, she had to conclude that she was not in much better shape.

With her eyes closed to the world, she saw nothing, but only heard wailing noises and a commotion of voices from people over her. Even those sounds faded into silence, and Belldandy was soon alone with herself to contemplate the consequences.

"There you are," a voice called out.

She looked around, finding nothing and no one around her. Still, it was a familiar voice.

"Who's there?" Belldandy asked.

When she spoke, however, only then did she recognize who was calling to her.

"I am," the voice replied.

Then, she felt a tap on her shoulder.

She turned around, and a chill traveled up her spine as she looked at herself.

"Thank heavens I found you!" said Belldandy, or what was a reflection of Belldandy. She was what the goddess had once been, only but a few weeks ago. It was the Belldandy whose body and clothing were perfect and intact, while the other's dress was torn in many places and skin red with scrapes and scratches. It was the Belldandy who had not cut her hair or broken loose from her reserved behavior.

"Wow," she said in astonishment, all the while examining her former self.

"It's me," the reflection replied, "Actually, it's you."

She shook her head, "Not anymore, you aren't."

"Why not? It's not too late."

Belldandy looked away, taking a step or two in the other direction. All of a sudden, there was something appealing in the offer. The voice of her shadow was distinctly different from that of her own. The tone, the inflections, everything was softer, more polite and refined. She had changed so much in a short amount of time, only to be able to remind herself, by way of a perfect copy of the original goddess, of what she used to be.

"I don't suppose I have much choice in the matter, now do I?"

The reflection smiled back, saying, "It's up to you. It all depends on what you want."

The words echoed in her ears, and Belldandy collapsed onto the floor in a heap of exasperation. Despondent, she replied, "I don't know what I want anymore."

Belldandy sat on the ground, discouraged and exhausted. She looked up and gasped, however, when it was her reflection that had wrapped her arms around her in a loving embrace.

"I'm dying, aren't I?" she asked.

The reflection declined to answer, resolving only to hold her tighter.

"Don't be sad," she finally said, "It's beneath you to act this way."

Belldandy scoffed with amusement, "Obviously, you don't know me too well anymore."

"Ah! You were joking at that moment, weren't you?"

Breaking through her sadness, Belldandy laughed, if only for a brief moment.

"Now I know this is a dream."

"Belldandy," the reflection said, facing her, "We don't have much time. It is up to you if you want to live. You have to act quickly."

Keiichi and Urd ran right up to her. "Well?" he asked, "How is it?"

"It's difficult to say," the Assistant said, "Much of Belldandy's body is trying to knit itself back together...but she was always a delicate sort. They told me that they have a few ideas, but I don't know if she can handle the stress."

Urd cried, "What do you mean you don't know if--there must be--it's in your power to--!"

"That's enough, Urd!" she snapped back, "Please go find Skuld, see if she's alright."

The elder goddess looked at the Assistant, then at Keiichi, then stormed off. At first, Keiichi didn't want to be left in the presence of the Assistant, but he noticed that even she was not seeming as proud as before.

"I don't know if this is my fault," she said, "I'm just performing my duty."

To be sure, there was more than enough blame to go around, Keiichi thought to himself. He had let Belldandy out of his sight, and allowed her to ride off without his knowing about it. He spent much time after the incident calculating the price for a moment of carelessness.

"How could this happen?" he said out loud.

The Assistant looked up at him, replying, "I've been asking myself the same thing."

"Please, there must be something you can do. Or maybe--"

"Belldandy did this to herself," she insisted, "I may have...pushed her by doing my job, but this is her own manifestation."

The Assistant paced, back and forth, in front of Keiichi. With the authority that she wielded, he dared not to test her patience, even as she appeared to be contrite.

"Free will is a dangerous thing, Keiichi. Mortals are masters over it, but it is foreign to us goddesses. It just wasn't meant for Belldandy to have."

"W-what do you mean?" Keiichi said hesitantly, "Belldandy...is she going to...?"

A pause in the Assistant's answer allowed him to trail off, never finishing his thought. "I don't know, Keiichi. This is...quite new to me."

Desperation filled up in his eyes, while his mouth stood agape. "I have to see her again," he said, "I have to see Belldandy before--"

"Keiichi, they promised me that they will call for us once they're done. Right now, we need to..."

"Alright. Alright!" Keiichi said, running off. He brushed his lower arm against his eyes as he rushed out of the building to grab some air.

"Oh, I'm sorry," he said, bumping into an unseen figure outside. "Chihiro!"

She was stopped in her tracks, but she was naturally understanding. "How're you doing, kid?" Chihiro replied, to which he had shrugged. "Just wanted to see how it was going. From the look of her sisters going in the other direction, doesn't seem too good."

Keiichi shook his head, "They're not really saying anything. I don't know what's happening."

"Hmm," she sounded, not knowing what to say. "We collected the bike. Pretty smashed up."

"I'm not really worried about that right now."

"Well, don't you worry. Belldandy's a fighter, I see it in her eyes all the time. I imagine you do, too."

"Please tell me," Belldandy said, "Am I being punished?"

Her reflection glanced back with a stern look. "You know full well that it isn't."

"Yeah. I do. It's my fault."

"Yes, it is. You were arrogant, and prideful, and foolish."

Belldandy looked up. "That's not very comforting," she scoffed. Deep down, though, the words rang true to her. "Then, are you here to judge me?"

Shaking her head, Belldandy's shadow replied, "I could never be angry at myself. Could you?"

"I guess I should be. Look at me! I was too dumb to accept losing, so I tried to pull off a stunt on Keiichi's bike! He'd kill me if he had the chance--" she said, stopping suddenly to consider her choice of words.

"Keiichi would never do that," the shadow said softly.

Belldandy looked at herself, smirking at the reply she received. "That's just a joke!"

"Oh."

"Wow, I can't believe how innocent I was."

The reflection replied, "Belldandy, you are running out of time. What will you do?"

Belldandy shrugged. She was genuinely lost, having been caught up in a conversation with herself in the depths of her own soul. "I don't know," she said simply.

"Then, I suppose you have a problem."

"Yeah, I suppose."

The two of them stood silent for a moment. Belldandy reasoned that this was a dream, but no dream or nightmare was this vivid. Her reflection was a stark reminder of her past, and that it was here to either pull her back or haunt her in advance of an inevitable death.

"I wonder how Keiichi is. And my sisters," she thought out loud.

"You wish to see them?" her shadow asked.

"Yeah," Belldandy nodded.

"Very well."

All of a sudden, the dark all around her lit up, slowly lifting her upwards while blinding her from seeing her reflection.

"Come back quickly!" the reflection cried from beneath her, "You don't have much time!"

Belldandy slowly opened her eyes, and found herself in an empty room, filled with machines to which she was connected. Not that she could have done anything about it, for she found it difficult to move. She groaned in pain, and a figure appeared over her in response.

"Hello," he said, "I'm your doctor. How do you feel?"

When she tried to speak at first, she was shocked to discover that it was just as difficult to speak as it was to do anything else. But she struggled to do so. "The others," she said, "Where are they?"

"Oh, yes. They're just outside, I'll send them in."

As the doctor walked out, Belldandy examined the room. Never before had she been in such an impersonal environment. She concluded that she must be in grave danger.

One by one, the five of them entered the room slowly and solemnly, the least solemn of which was the Assistant, who had no facial expression at all. With her eyes, Belldandy greeted all of them.

It was Chihiro who broke the silence, saying, "I just stopped by to see how you were doing."

Belldandy lifted a hand to acknowledge her, then looked at Skuld.

"Skuld," she said, "You don't...have to stay...if you don't want..."

The youngest sister nodded hesitantly, replying, "That's alright."

Belldandy nodded in return, then turning to another, "Keiichi?"

A fearful Keiichi stepped forward. "I'm here, Belldandy. How are you feeling?" he asked.

"Well, it hurts like hell," Belldandy joked, "I can...say that now...can't get in...any more trouble."

Keiichi laughed, or rather forced himself to laugh. But soon after he reverted back to his gloomy and apologetic state. "I'm sorry," he said gently.

"Please don't," she replied, "It's my fault. All of it...is my fault."

"Don't worry about that now," Keiichi told her, "Just try to--Bell?"

Involuntarily, Belldandy broke out crying softly, apologizing profusely. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..."

At once, Keiichi instinctively sat down at her bedside, holding her hand delicately, persuading her to respond to him. But it was no use, as she unwillingly drifted back to sleep, leaving a despondent Keiichi to weep over her body. The emotion was too much, that it forced Skuld to bolt out of the room, followed by the Assistant. Urd watched her leave, and suddenly followed her out as well.

"Assistant!" Urd cried, storming towards her, "Where do you think you are going?"

"I don't know! I need to think by myself for a moment!" the Assistant replied.

The elder goddess pursued her still, chasing her down from a hurried walk away from the building. "You would let Belldandy die? And for what? Is it pride?"

"It is not my pride that started this," the Assistant retorted, "And it is out of our hands. If you do anything to interfere, I will--"

"You'll what, punish me? At least she would live," Urd said forcefully. The Assistant began to walk off again, only to be held by Urd before she was two steps away from her. "Get back in there and help her," she demanded.

"I can't! She has made her choice quite clear, and now she has to live with that, as well as die with it."

Urd gasped, and abruptly loosened her grip on the Assistant. "You disgrace us," she said, "Our duty is serve others. How is it that we cannot serve each other?"

Her words struck at the Assistant, who had no reply. "Urd..." she replied softly.

"No," Urd said, breaking in the other direction, "You've made yourself clear. You live with your decision now."

"Urd, please!" she cried, but it was too late after the elder goddess ducked back into the building. The Assistant was alone.

Keiichi and Chihiro paused their conversation as they watched Urd storm into the hallway, angrily pace across the floor for a few laps, and storm back outside. If Urd was this upset, they could imagine what Skuld must be like, even though she took off long before her older sister.

"They are taking it really hard," Chihiro said.

Keiichi turned to her, saying, "Wouldn't you?"

"I don't know, really. Belldandy's really lucky to have two sisters that love her."

"Yeah," he replied. Unable to settle in his chair, Keiichi walked around, visibly disturbed by the recent turn of events.

"It's not your fault, Keiichi," Chihiro said, "Everyone makes mistakes."

"I knew she was upset after losing today, I didn't know she was going to do something like this. I should've kept an eye on her."

"Perhaps, but I think she's the kind of person who makes up her mind all by herself."

He sat back down, asking her, "What do you mean?"

"Well, she loves you, anyone can see that," she explained, "But something's different about her lately. I don't know what, but I'm sure you understand what I mean, you must see it. She doesn't seem dependent on anyone anymore. No, Belldandy has to make her own choices. It's up to you to make sure she doesn't do anything stupid, but besides that, she has to decide for herself what is best for her."

Keiichi nodded. He didn't know if Chihiro was right or wrong, but it was something worth considering in the future. He looked at his watch and it told him that it was late. Instinctively, he stretched his arms and yawned.

"I just hope she can get through this," he said.

"Well, I sure can't promise you anything," Chihiro replied, "I'm not a miracle worker."

The shattering of glass vials and flasks and the constant rifling through books and other objects betrayed Urd's presence in the Morisato residence. She spent twenty minutes channeling her powers into a mixture she hoped would have some healing qualities. Though she was quite noisy, Urd tried her best not to have anyone know that she was there, for fear of the Assistant shutting down her efforts before the deed was done.

With the complexities of the potion she was creating, Urd could have certainly used a helping hand, especially considering the urgency of Belldandy's condition. But Keiichi didn't know the first thing about magic, and Skuld would have had to suffer the same consequences that she did. And the elder goddess always did things like this by herself. This was her fall to take, and with Belldandy's fate uncertain, she was going to take it without a second thought. She was not going to let anyone tell her that her sister was beyond anyone's help, especially hers.

"C'mon," she said to herself while waiting for the mixture to boil and set. Time was indeed short.

When it was ready, she transferred the potion into a small vial and concealed it underneath her garments. Taking flight, she bolted for the door the second she had what she needed.

As it was dark, however, she could not see a figure lurking in the hall.

"Hey!" she uttered as she fell to the ground.

"Watch where you're going!" the startled figure exclaimed.

Urd knew that voice, and quickly turned on a light. There, in the hall, was her youngest sister Skuld, fooling around with some headgear invention of hers in the dark.

"Skuld!" Urd cried, "What are you doing here?"

"What does it look like, you big dummy?" Skuld snapped back. She stood up and collected the loose parts of her machine, and it was suddenly quite clear to Urd what she was doing. "What are you doing here? The Assistant will punish you!"

Urd checked for the potion to see if it was still on her. Sure enough it remained in her pocket.

"Well, what about you?" she retorted.

"Me?" Skuld replied, "Well, I, uh...Belldandy's my sister, and I'd do anything for her!"

"Don't worry about it," Urd insisted, "I'll take care of it."

"What do you think your potions are going to do? I just have to make some modifications on this so Sister can get better. Besides, we can't both get into trouble!"

Urd watched Skuld tinker with the headgear that was in her hands. It was clear that her sibling wasn't going to back down, and neither was she going to change her own mind about Belldandy.

"I'll give you five minutes," Urd said, "Then we're going back together."

Belldandy lay in bed, unconscious and unaware of Keiichi's presence in the room. He continued to sit at her side, hoping that she would wake up on her own.

"Belldandy," he said, "I don't know if you can hear me. I just wanted to say...it never mattered to me what you were. First, you were a goddess, and then you became human, but I didn't care one way or the other, just as long as you were happy. Because for a long time, I just can't imagine what life is like without you in it."

He held her hand as if to elicit a response from her. Despite that, Belldandy remained motionless.

"And if you want to be human," he added, "I would never have stopped you. But...please wake up, Belldandy. I know you don't want to go back, but if it's the only way...please wake up, Belldandy!"

Keiichi continued to hold on to her, but in all of his exhaustion and desperation, his head slowly dropped to her side. There he remained, waiting for her to respond.

Touching down in front of the building, Skuld and Urd readied their creations and resolved to go in together.

"Now," Urd said, "I will use this potion on Belldandy, and only after that you can use your invention."

Skuld retorted, "What are you talking about? My headgear is sure to work, I'll go first!"

"Are we going to get into this now? I'm going first."

"Fine! Not that your potion will have any effect anyways!"

"Ahem!"

The two goddesses turned around. To their shock, there stood the Assistant with an angry expression on her face.

"What are you two doing?" she asked blatantly.

Both Skuld and Urd fumbled for an answer, but all they had to give were incoherent syllables and unfinished thoughts.

"Er...I...um...well..."

"This...uh...it...we..."

"Give me those," the Assistant demanded, showing the palm of her hand.

The sisters looked at each other, silently persuading each other to do something and fast.

"You are in enough trouble already," the Assistant said, "I will not allow you two to make things worse for Belldandy. Give. Me. Those."

Unwillingly, the two conceded, reluctantly giving up their possessions to the Assistant.

"Good. You two will stay here with me where I can see you, but you are not going back into her room. Is that understood?"

Defeated, Skuld bowed her head to the ground and went inside, leaving the two of them to spar with each other.

"Just what were you two thinking?" the Assistant asked.

"She's my sister," Urd pleaded, "I wasn't going to let her die!"

"Yes, well...as it is, her injuries are far too severe," she said, "Do you think these were going to do any good?"

Urd scoffed at the Assistant. Insulted, she said, "At least I was willing to do something! I'm certainly not going to follow orders that don't make sense!"

Determined to get the last word, the goddess turned around and marched into the building. It didn't matter, for the Assistant had no response, and had Urd stayed, she would have seen a complete change in the Assistant's demeanor, from one of strictness to one showing fragments of compassion and contrition.

"You are running out of time, Belldandy."

"You keep saying that!" an annoyed Belldandy retorted, "It's not like I don't know what's going on."

"Than what are you waiting for?" her reflection asked.

Belldandy let the question hang in the air for a moment, as she walked in circles around herself, gazing out into the depths of nothingness.

"I'm not waiting for anything," she conceded reluctantly, "I'll do it at the last possible moment."

"Do what?"

"What you want me to do, of course. Go back to what I was, become a goddess again."

"I see."

"Yeah, I've decided," Belldandy said with a hint of defiance, "Actually, I was made to decide. It may be hard for the others to believe, but I like who I am now. My life as a goddess was wonderful, but I never knew what it was like to feel my heart really pound against my chest, and have blood fill my cheeks when I blush as I hold Keiichi's hand. I found out what it was like to be afraid and to be truly defeated, and I learned how to face my fears and become more than I thought I was. Do you know what a rush of adrenaline feels like? It's almost like being in love. That comes from not knowing what my future will bring. It's terrifying and unpredictable, and I realized I wanted that more than anything."

Belldandy paused. All this time, a smile played across her face as she recalled what she had experienced in recent days. But the expression faded into oblivion, replaced with bitter sadness over what she believed to be inevitable.

"All that's over now, I guess," she said somberly, lowering her head but fighting back a wash of emotion filling her eyes.

Belldandy's former reflection approached her. She looked at her from underneath her lowered head. "Is that what you think?" she asked politely.

Not knowing what to say, Belldandy stood there with a confused look on her face. She did not understand what her shadow was asking. On top of everything, the faint implication in her question was too complicated for her to untangle.

"You're here to tell me that I have to go back. You're supposed to remind me of what I used to be..."

"Belldandy," the reflection replied, smiling, "I have seldom forced anyone to do anything that they didn't want to do. You know that of yourself better than anyone!"

"Then--then what--"

"If you want something, Belldandy, then fight for it! Don't accept what is being done to you. Do what you believe will make you happy!"

She knew she was right. In fact, it was what she always believed. But Belldandy remained as confused as ever.

"But I'm dying," she said quite simply, "How am I supposed to--?"

"Come now, Belldandy. You're still me, after all. You know how to solve your problem," her reflection said.

Belldandy thought about it. A few moments before she would not have thought it possible, but slowly it was coming to her. She was human and lacked the clarity and wisdom of a goddess, but in her mind she was conjuring up a solution.

"It's crazy!" she exclaimed.

Her shadow nodded.

"Yes."

"It'll never work."

"It's your only chance. What do you have to lose?"

She paused. "Not a lot," she mumbled, "But what about you?"

"Me?" the reflection asked, "I...I will cease to exist. You will be all that remains. From this point on, there is no turning back. There are many challenges that you have yet to face. You will find mortal life to be difficult and unkind, and you may even regret it at times. But if you are who you want to be, you will prevail and be happy."

Belldandy nodded resolutely. "I'm sorry I called you innocent."

They both laughed.

"It's not in my nature to be angry," the reflection replied.

Once again, Belldandy began to wake up. As darkness all around her turned to a searing bright light, Her former self drifted from her view for one last time. Before she was completely gone, she whispered to her, "Goodbye."

Belldandy, for a second time, woke up to the whirring of machines at her sides, monitoring her or keeping her alive. But her blurred vision focused on two figures on the opposite end of the room.

"Keiichi" she said faintly.

He rushed up to her at once. "I'm here, Belldandy," Keiichi said.

"My...sisters...are they...?"

"They're outside. Chihiro's here, too. Do you want to--?"

"Keiichi."

He paused as Belldandy struggled to speak. "What is it?"

"Please," she said, choking on her words and taking painful breaths to remain conscious.

"Yes?"

"Please tell me the truth."

Keiichi's jaw dropped. He uttered a few incoherent sounds before he found his voice again. "I c-can't."

To his surprise, Belldandy let out a soft laugh. "It's that bad, huh?" she joked.

Even that made Keiichi smile, if only ever so slightly. "Belldandy..." he said.

"Keiichi," she replied, "I need to speak...to her...for a moment...could you please--?"

"Yeah, sure," he said, nodding his head quickly. He stepped out of the room at her consent, leaving Belldandy with the Assistant, who was sitting at the foot of her bed the whole time.

"Belldandy," the Assistant said, "I am so sorry."

"No...don't be. But once I'm out of here...I'm gonna...kick your butt for everything..." Belldandy replied, fading in and out.

The Assistant lowered her head, saying, "You have every right to be angry, Belldandy."

"Oh, my. Doesn't...anyone know when I'm joking? What's wrong with you p--"

She stopped in mid-sentence, coughing and convulsing violently, but only for a moment. She settled back down into her bed, taking a moment to breathe normally again.

"Please, Belldandy," the Assistant said, "Your condition is getting worse."

"Assistant," Belldandy whispered, "Please come closer."

The Assistant did so, leaning in to better hear her voice.

"Assistant...you have a choice. If humanity has taught me anything...it's that...we all have choices. Do this...for yourself."

She looked at Belldandy, and all of a sudden, instead of the obvious course of action, a new alternative seemed like an easy decision to make. But she remained hesitant.

"I don't know if I can," the Assistant replied, "I don't know if I will be accepted again."

Belldandy breathed heavily, still struggling to make her voice heard. The Assistant leaned closer still, with an ear to Belldandy's lips.

"Then...do it for me," Belldandy whispered weakly.

She gazed at her again, not believing what she was asking, despite its simplicity.

"Consider it a last request."

The four of them sat close to each other as they waited somewhat impatiently for news of any sort, either from the Assistant or the staff. They were out of words at the moment, and so they sat silently, hoping that something would happen and happen soon.

Unable to withstand the tension, Chihiro stood up, saying, "Well, I'm going to catch some air."

That left Keiichi and Belldandy's sisters in a virtually empty hallway.

"What did she say to you?" Urd asked.

"Nothing," Keiichi replied, "She just wanted to be alone with her."

The elder goddess nodded. "Well, that should settle it very soon."

"Urd," Skuld asked, "When Sister is, um...the Assistant will rescind the recall order, right?"

"I think so. Everything...will be back to normal again."

"Hmm," uttered Keiichi, almost unnoticed.

The door swung open, and out came the Assistant, walking towards Keiichi quite methodically. She had rare, warm smile on her face. Something had occured, and to the three of them it could only be good.

"Yes?" Keiichi asked her, "What happened?"

The Assistant chuckled briefly. To Urd and Skuld, it was unusual to hear such a sound come from her lips. But in that cold hallway, a sense of warmth radiated from her.

"What?" Belldandy's sisters said.

Her smile grew even larger. Finally she responded to them, "I granted her wish."

They all gasped, Skuld and Urd moreso than Keiichi for they better knew the implications. Regardless, the three of them were quite surprised. Still more surprised, when a fountain of light shone all around the Assistant. She closed her eyes and allowed the light to swirl around and envelop her. Within moments, as the illumination took over the entire hallway and disappeared in much the same manner, the Assistant was gone, transported back to the heavens, having completed her first duty in what was virtually an eternity.

She had granted Belldandy's wish. They looked at each other as they pondered what that had meant, until they finally thought to check up on her.

"Belldandy!" Keiichi cried as he opened the door just as abruptly.

Her sisters quickly followed, pouring into the room and descending upon her to learn of her fate.

"Skuld! Urd!" Belldandy exclaimed with a newfound energy, "I'm so glad to see you!"

She remained confined to her bed, but Belldandy was more than happy to embrace her two sisters. Holding them tightly, she shed a tear of joy, right before she winced in pain.

"Ow!" she said, "Easy now. I'm not all back just yet!"

The two goddesses stepped back and examined her. Belldandy was alive and out of danger, but she still sported fading bruises and cuts from her accident.

"Sister," Skuld asked, "Are you still--?"

Nodding her head, Belldandy didn't know how they would react. Yet, the youngest of the three sisters responded quite favorably with a smile in return.

"Alright," she replied, "I'm so happy you're alive!"

At once, she hugged Belldandy again, and was rewarded with a kiss on her forehead.

"Me too," Urd added.

"Really?" Belldandy said, looking at her curiously.

"Yeah!" she exclaimed, "I was afraid I'd have to come visit you every day from now on!"

Belldandy scoffed, but ultimately took her hand and held it to express her thanks. Holding them both, she looked at them and asked, "We'll always be like this, right?"

Skuld quickly replied, "You bet!"

Urd's response, however, was just a bit more measured, and her expression, while one of relief, remained cautious. "Yeah, why not?" she said.

From the doorway, Keiichi silently looked on the three of them, quite content that the ordeal was over, even though things had not returned completely to normal. In fact, they would never be the same.

"The doctor said you should stick around for another day," Keiichi said.

"Yeah, and he said I could go if I wanted to, and I want to," Belldandy replied as she prepared herself to leave. After gathering her things, she looked in the mirror, all the while combing her hair. "I've spent three days in bed, doing nothing but grow older. Which is kinda new to me. I can't wait to get out of here. Besides, Urd and Skuld said they had prepared a cake for my homecoming today. Which means I'm going to have to make a substitute for everyone."

Keiichi laughed. "You can't do everything, you know. At least not anymore."

"I'm human," she replied, nodding, "I'll do what I can. And I can still make the best dinner you've ever had, am I right?"

"Actually, the least you can do is fix my motorcycle, seeing as though you've rendered it unusable," he joked.

Belldandy kissed him on the lips. "Aw, Keiichi. Don't you know by now I can't fix anything besides tea and sandwiches? Nuts and bolts, that's your job."

She then whispered under her breath, "Lord knows I don't know where they go, and I mean that."

Keiichi rolled his eyes, amused as he took her personal effects. "C'mon, let's go."

The door to Morisato residence slid open, and Belldandy rejoiced. "I'm home!" she cried loud enough to echo through the temple hallways.

On his way to the washroom, Keiichi put down her things on the table, where surely enough a cake made by her sisters stood. It was a rather nice creation, and she resolved to have some later once they sat down to dinner. There were so many things she wanted to do with them, the first of which was take them to a movie that she wanted to see after the race was over. There was also a weekend event in town and she wanted to take Keiichi to see it with her. Of course, the house was a bit of a mess, and she would have to spend some time cleaning up. She thought about how nice it was not to lay in bed for a significant stretch of time and do nothing. Now, with the all-important race behind her, Belldandy could finally get back to resuming her regular routine with her sisters and Keiichi.

"Skuld?" she called out.

Belldandy felt as light as a feather. Actually, she was careful not to bounce around as she was still healing, but she could not be happier. Her troubles with the Assistant were over and she survived a major accident. Belldandy managed to walk away from all of it. In a way, this was a clean slate for her, free to do with as she pleased.

"Urd?"

Her future lay before her, and she knew not what it was, and that in itself was exciting to Belldandy. She welcomed the new challenge of being human, and for good.

"Skuld? Urd?"

Keiichi met Belldandy in the hallway. "Bell?"

"Have you seen them?" she asked with a hint of desperate anticipation in her voice.

"No, I haven't," he replied.

Belldandy looked to her left, then her right. She slowly walked towards the next room, saying out loud, "Something's not right."

She checked the residence and all of the rooms in it, and then searched it again. Fifteen minutes passed, but the house remained silent, save for Belldandy's hurried footsteps and Keiichi's following behind her. Ten more minutes went by, and the conclusion was easy to draw, but it was difficult for Belldandy to say.

"The Assistant," she finally mumbled in a frantic voice, "She never rescinded the order."

"Belldandy?"

"My sisters, Keiichi!" Belldandy exclaimed, "They must've been recalled. They're gone!"

TO BE CONCLUDED.


	13. Epilogue

Only Human  
  
An Ah! My Goddess Fanfic  
  
By Roehl Sybing (indef@infinitedeferral.com)  
  
Epilogue  
  
Keiichi took the week off from his usual duties at the club and at the shop. The break was easy to grant once word had gotten around that Belldandy hadn't left her room in four days, except to eat or bathe. The story was Urd and Skuld had to fly back home in an emergency, which was partly true. The real problem was that she and Keiichi would never see them again.  
  
Belldandy didn't even have the power to appeal. As a human, she was unable to communicate with the heavens through her usual means, and after three days it had become quite clear that no one was being sent down to explain why the redundant recall order had taken effect.  
  
Day four, then, was the quietest in the Morisato residence. Belldandy hadn't come out of her room all day long, and nothing Keiichi had done to persuade her to eat or at least talk to him had worked. Day quickly turned to night, and by early evening Keiichi fixed dinner for himself, setting aside another serving just in case Belldandy was hungry.  
  
It wasn't long after he sat down, however, when he heard her door slide open, and she tiptoed out into the dining room.  
  
"Belldandy?" Keiichi said.  
  
She nodded weakly, walking past the dinner prepared for her. She sat down next to Keiichi, looking at him with a sullen expression on her face.  
  
"I was a fool," Belldandy said.  
  
Keiichi shrugged. He replied simply, "I don't know."  
  
She sighed. "I didn't even think to have them check for me. But even so, I started all of this. I don't know why Urd looked like that the other day. She knew. The Assistant...maybe she forgot to rescind the recall, or maybe she couldn't, I don't know. But Urd knew. I was such a fool!"  
  
"I don't know what to say."  
  
"It's alright, I understand. There's nothing that can be done about it. My sisters are gone. Forever."  
  
The tone of finality was on Belldandy's lips as she stood back up and walked out. Keiichi looked about ready to follow her, but she waved him off on her way out.  
  
"Where are you going?" he asked.  
  
"It's time to move on," she replied.  
  
Keiichi was curious, but eventually thought it best to leave her alone for the time being. He picked up a morsel of food on his plate, but put it back down again as he considered her response. What did she mean?  
  
A large thud shook the floor, followed by the sound of dragging across the hallway. Now Keiichi had to look. There, in the hall, Belldandy was carrying her mat into Keiichi's room.  
  
"Don't mind me," she said with half of a smile on her lips. Keiichi raised an eyebrow as she let herself into his room.  
  
He stood in the doorway, turning on the lights and watching her rearrange the furniture. "What are you doing?" he asked.  
  
Belldandy continued to work. "They're gone," she said, "It's a very quiet house all of a sudden. I can't deal with that all by myself in my own room. Besides, there's been a bit of draft in there for some time. Gets cold at nights. Skuld's room is too small, and really, do you want to tinker with whatever potions Urd has in her room? So it has to be your room, Keiichi."  
  
Keiichi looked around as she made short work of the arrangement of his room. Knocking over several objects in the process.  
  
"Oops, sorry about that."  
  
"You weren't needing that, were you?"  
  
"Oh, I'm sure we can put that somewhere else."  
  
"Belldandy!" Keiichi finally said.  
  
She looked up at him, replying, "Yes?"  
  
Keiichi stared at her inquisitively. "Where am I going to sleep?"  
  
Belldandy's jaw dropped slightly, and she laughed. "Right here, silly!" she exclaimed, "I want to sleep here with you, if that's fine with you."  
  
He remained in place, speechless.  
  
"Wow," was all he could utter.  
  
She smiled. "Keiichi," she said, "I don't know what will happen to us now. But I don't want to face it alone. And since my sisters are gone, you're going to have to make do all by yourself. So what say we start a new life together?"  
  
Keiichi liked the sound of that, and repeated it to himself just to make sure it was real.  
  
"Alright," he said.  
  
"Good!" Belldandy replied, "Hold that thought, I'll be right back."  
  
She walked around Keiichi, towards the living room. "So," Keiichi asked her, "What are you going to do now?"  
  
Belldandy turned around and looked at him. She walked right up and kissed him gently on the cheek. "Anything we want," she said resolutely.  
  
END.  
  
---  
  
Writer's notes:  
  
Well, that just about concludes this story. It began in March of 2002 as an innocent enough project revolving around a simple "what if?" Twelve chapters and 40,000+ words later, I am quite pleased with the result.  
  
The following are just some of the many people I wish to thank:  
  
Chan Wei Lik, for prereading some of the early chapters.  
  
DB Sommer, for generously providing much-needed comments and criticisms on the FanFiction Mailing List.  
  
Kevin McHorney, Schobronics and SmkViper, for prereading both Chapter Twelve and the Epilogue, making sure that the story ending was ready for the masses.  
  
Some people have suggested that a sequel was in order. I wouldn't necessarily rule it out. :)  
  
Thanks to everyone for reading this fanfic from start to finish. Until next time!  
  
- Roehl Sybing 


End file.
